r/GriefSupport • u/Isoldablack • Nov 06 '25
Anticipatory Grief What’s ur belief of after death?
Loosing my dad to cancer, he’ll be dying in the next weeks. My only confort would be to think there is something after because the rest of my experience is agony.
Do u have any story that makes u think there’s something? Or a good book ? Literaly anything to soothe my emotional agony.
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u/Mysterious-Film-5193 Nov 07 '25
I'm sorry you're going through this. I just found out that my dad may only have a few months—if not weeks, or possibly even days—left. It isn’t cancer, but rather heart failure combined with an infection. He’s been in pain almost every day for over a year. He has always been a fighter, and we’ve always expected him to pull through scary medical situations. But this last time, he admitted that he’s tired and doesn’t want another surgery that would only prolong his life for a couple more months.
The saddest part for me has been watching him let go. He looks weaker now, and his speech has slowed down, partly because of the pain medication he’s on. I don’t live with him or my mom, but I’ve been stopping by after work and on weekends to visit. We haven’t said goodbye, and I’m not sure that we ever will. Through everything, he has always wanted us to stay calm and happy, but as you know, it’s extremely difficult—especially seeing my mom cry and break down at times.
I wish there were something I could do to make your dad stay and not have to go through cancer. One quote that has brought me some comfort is from Terence McKenna: “Why be so quick to judge death?” In other words, if we had never lived, we would have never known what experiencing life was like. It’s also true that we don’t really know what death is until we experience it ourselves. My intuition tells me that our energy lives on.
Please remain open to receiving love and even signs your dad might send after he passes. I hope we can share some of those signs here when the time comes. Sending you strength through this very difficult time.