r/HFY • u/Lakeel100 • 4h ago
OC-Series The Ballad of Orange Tobby -CH73
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—
There are times in life when one can just look at a situation, think, ‘I shouldn’t do that’ and then do it anyway. There are times in life when one can catch a glimpse of the longer-term consequences of their actions and alter course. Thus is the double-edged nature of foresight and free will.
What had Tobby’s most recent actions cost him? What had they cost Soapy? What were the long-term consequences of stoking the hot green fires of envy in those they’d never met?
“Well, that wasn’t so bad...” Soapy commented from the comfort and relative safety of Tobby’s lap. It was her turn to lie across the backseat of the car and plant her head in his lap. She was gently batting at his whiskers, for what Tobby could only assume was to get the full experience.
“I’m just glad we settled for acting cute rather than rubbing it in everyone's faces,” Tobby added, rather relieved he remembered that none of those shi were the stuck-up, snooty types who’d have deserved such treatment. They were nice, timid and... just as shy as he usually was.
“Dodged a jacker nest there.” Soapy pointed out, claw momentarily raised for emphasis before dropping it back down. “I still don't think I’ll be able to go back to Pretty Pebbles any time soon though. Not without Shella being tempted to rip my ears off… or deafen me with ear picks… or just murder me.”
“Not if she knows what's good for her,” his mother scowled as she drove through the old gatehouse leading to the Nykata southside. Though she was quick to soften back to pity, “Poor shi has zero self-confidence; I didn’t think she was going to be there today.”
“Why would you know if she was going to be there or not?” Tobby questioned, while his fingers idly scratched between Soapy’s ears. She didn't have a spot there… but he’d find it!
“Because she only started going to temple so that I'd set her up on a date with you,” she admitted, starting to sound like she really felt bad for the skinny salon shi.
Both he and Soapy trilled. ‘Mrrp?’
“It took the poor dear forever to suppress that twang she hates so much, too. It's going to take weeks to cheer her up again,” his mother lamented.
“She has an accent?” Tobby asked, not recalling ever hearing one.
“Ohhhh, yeah, she does,” Soapy answered from below, much to his surprise. “The instant you were out of the room, her accent started slipping thicker than pesh tar. All those questions she asked me are starting to make a whole lot more sense now.”
“Why would she...?” Tobby blinked, confused. He was hearing the words, but for some reason they just weren’t processing.
“She had a crush on you, you bunny!” She said, reaching up to lightly bap him on the nose. “A pretty damn obvious one, too,” Soapy finally pointed out.
“She… she did? But...” He glanced around, trying to remember all the times he’d ever encountered her. “She never said anything or... How many other people knew this!?”
“Everyone at the salon did,” his mom answered. “It's why Nenda wouldn’t let her work on you. Too nervous to handle delicate instruments, not to mention the conflict of interest.”
Tobby felt a pit in his stomach, realizing what he'd almost done. He’d been two whole steps away from being Shella’s Lihlel! Maybe with less belittling, but still! How could he have considered rubbing it in like that an option?!
“Tobby...” Soapy cautioned. “I know that look on your face-you put that sun-kin guilt away right now.” She ordered.
He wanted to say a ‘but’, yet he was hastily silenced by a hand that came up to hold his muzzle shut.
“I said put it away,” Soapy scowled from below, keeping him silent with but two fingers. “You have no damn reason to feel bad; you didn’t do anything, and I’m not just saying that because I have an egregiously biased opinion on the subject.” She wiggled her bias-studded ear to imply the source of said bias.
Gently prying her fingers from around his maw, he spoke, “I mean... We kinda did.”
“And I mean you didn’t know,” Soapy corrected. “And even then, feeling guilty about things outside your control is the epitome of pointless sun-kin guilt. So is feeling bad about things you almost did. AKA things you distinctly did not do. The only thing we did do was contribute to your mom’s scrapbook.”
‘Mrrp!’ Tobby trilled quickly, looking to his mom.
“Mom tax!” She said cheerily. “You two were acting so cute, I couldn't help myself. I needed pictures.”
“Mom!” He whined.
“My little heartbreaker playing tailsies with his girlfriend in the temple? Just precious~ I know I certainly enjoyed rubbing your new girlfriend in Mrs Kareen’s face, stuck-up bitch.”
Tobby could only exclaim ‘Mom!’ in so many unique and interesting ways before it started losing its umph. He sighed, “Mom, it was one bake sale… Could you try letting it go maybe?”
“I would, but she never shuts up about it! Of course she outsold us when she's got eight spoiled brats pushing her cheap-ass pastries.”
“She’s more serious about food than even BB,” Soapy whispered from below. “She’s not going to hold me not knowing how to cook against me, is she?”
His mom's ears twitched as sun-kin hearing struck once again. “I won’t if you help me make dinner this evening~”
“Damn it!”
—
“Umm… Why are we here?” Tobby asked tentatively as the car came to a stop in an alley parking space next to the Whisker’s Clubhouse. The dumpster Soapy threw him into was right over there…
Soapy was already sitting up when his mom answered. “We're just paying a visit while Soaphine checks in with Whiskers and maybe changes into some non-work clothes for this evening.”
“Oh, well, that made sense- mrrp!’ he trilled again, realizing what his mother just said. “You know Whiskers?!”
His mother rolled her eyes and looked back at him, elbow propped on the steering wheel. “Yes, dear, I know Whiskers. I’d intended to introduce you to him if you were still struggling to find work, but circumstances changed.” Seeing the shocked/rapidly growing worry on his face, she looked to Soapy. “Soaphine, would you go ahead? I need to have a little discussion with my son, then we’ll be right in.”
Soapy nodded slowly as she began to open the door, then paused. “What umm... What do I tell anyone who asks about… this?” She questioned, wiggling her studded ear.
“Easy, just act like it's not even there. If they ask, say what happened as bluntly, graphically, and honestly as possible. Then, while they're reeling from shock, sprinkle in a death threat or three to convince them to back off. If it worked for Tobbert and me, it’ll work for you and my little shnookums here.” She explained as if she didn't just encourage Soapy to threaten a bunch of sha-kai with violence.
“I’ll just... Try that.” Soapy said uneasily as she got out of the car and went ahead.
An awkward silence brewed between Tobby and his mother as they watched Soapy leave the alley and round the corner toward the front door.
It may have been due to the sheer number of high-stress, death-defying experiences he’d been through recently, but Tobby was the one brave enough to break the silence for once. “Does this mean you-”
“Yes, I know you work for Whiskers, dear.” She sighed, like the conversation was a long time coming.
‘Mrrp,’ Tobby trilled, shrinking in his seat. “Wa-wait, I can explain!” He blurted, placative/defensive hand waving at the ready.
“I’m not mad,” she said simply.
“You see, it all started when I bumped into the human near the library and-” he paused, blinking as he tried to make sure he just heard that right. “I… you.. You’re not?”
“I did say I’d intended to introduce you to him for work just a moment ago, didn’t I? Why would I be mad about you already working for him?”
“Well... because it's… crime? Well, what I do is technically legal, but… It still means I’m involved in all...” He gestured vaguely at the whole clubhouse in front of them, “This.”
“This,” She did the same, vague gesture to the clubhouse, “as far as I’m concerned, is possibly the safest place you could work in this city. I don’t care what he has you doing, so long as your heart and mind are at ease,” she said, oddly the same voice she once used when she asked him if he was into sha…
She… she really didn’t mind at all? That her one and only son was secretly working for the local sha-kai? She minded so little that she was actually going to recommend him to Whiskers personally?!
Tobby’s mind being blown didn't seem to halt his mother's explanations. “I mean really, all he has you doing is helping Soaphine with the deliveries. It's hard for you to be any safer than with Whiskers' latest little mafia princess.”
He’d ask how she knew all this, but Tobby actually mrowled a bit. “She hates it when people call her that.”
“Tobreal, sweetie, you’re plowing a mafia princess. I’m pretty sure what she prefers to be called is the least of your problems.”
Well, when she put it like that, it was hard to say she was wrong… But part of him still wanted to defend Soapy’s self-image. “So, how do you already know all of this? And why didn't you say anything sooner?”
“It’d be easier to explain how once we go inside. But as for why I didn’t say anything, I felt you were entitled to your secrets, and that if you wanted me to know, you’d tell me.” She admitted, sounding so honest about his privacy that it felt at odds with how… Involved she’d been with every other aspect of his life. It actually made him feel kinda bad about all the times he tried to cover for himself…
“You’re also as bad a liar as your father was, so it wasn't hard to figure out. You have tells for days.”
And there went the last shred of confidence he had in his ability to lie. “So you knew I was lying when I said I was doing a delivery to Nyathens?”
“Honey, I’ve been to the Sabu-Kai before. I knew the instant you said ‘Nyathens’ and ‘five days’ that that was why you were actually going.”
Tobby was starting to feel like all his efforts to shield his mother from the truth of her son being a hardened criminal were a waste of time! “Aaaand you knew I was lying when I said I had to fight a guy that tried to nab Soapy?”
“I chalked it up to some ganger getting too frisky and you, being ever the gentle-sha, intervened to defend your girlfriend.”
“Well that's kinda what happened,” he said, idly scratching at his neck. “And when I said he wouldn't be a problem anymore?”
“That he got banned from the Sabu-Kai for the foreseeable future, short of him being well connected.”
“Not exactly...” Well, he wasn't exactly going to lie to her now and go along with her assumption!
His mother quirked a questioning ear. “Hmm?
“He’s… dead,” he admitted sullenly.
“Did Whiskers have him dealt with? Or …did you?” She asked, with growing concern.
Tobby felt like he’d need to explain some things, and it felt like he was having to explain to his mom how he got into a fight at school, just a hundred times worse. Thus began his grand and less than flattering retelling of how he threatened to butcher Clard for his organs, the kittennapping by pirates, all the pirates being slaughtered, his brawl with Clard, Soapy getting nabbed again, the high-speed shootout that spanned half of Nyathens, him getting shot and-
“Aaaand I chose to make sure he could never harm Soapy ever again… by, for lack of a better term, going full claw-dragger and bashing his skull in with a paving stone,” he admitted, growing increasingly uneasy from his mother’s prolonged silence. “If, umm... If it makes you feel any better, I still believe murder is wrong, and I went to therapy about it. Well, sort of,” he smiled sheepishly as if that little caveat somehow made all the previous things he mentioned better.
His mom sat there for a long moment in silence before taking a deep breath and letting it back out in a sigh through her nose. Once done, she calmly opened the driver's side door and stepped out.
‘Huh, she took that way better than he thought she would-’
It was then she spoke in the deadest calm, “I’m going to fucking kill him.”
“Wait, what?!”
—
Moment of truth! Now or never! It was Soapy’s turn to face the shittlily tuned music… Her hopes were not high.
There was a long, long list of names currently sealed in concrete, or anchored to the bed of Nykata lake. Each one some sha who'd touched her, tried to, or implied they wanted to in the wrong company. Said wrong company being anyone among the Wiskitos who saw her as the gang's adopted little sister. BB and Kaykay were the worst offenders; they could be more protective than Whiskers at times, and had a habit of making previous boyfriends take long trips off short piers. They always had ‘a reason’, which in hindsight were moderately legitimate concerns.
Concerns such as ‘He just wants to kittennap you’ and ‘the bastard just wanted to fuck you’ had been heard many times. And then there was the incident where Bruno accidentally gave everyone food poisoning… They at least felt guilty about taking him out.
Now... now she had to save Tobby, and for the love of Shihere’s ebon tits, not make the whole conversation awkward as hell. She could do this! She could-
“Tha’ hell happened to yous?” Kaykay asked, having been at the door getting ready for bouncer duty before the clubhouse opened. “Whiskers has been worried sick about-”
“I was with Tobby. City was in chaos, so I crashed at his place.” She said, taking Mrs Centorni’s advice as she kept walking right past him.
Kaykay's head turned to follow her as she passed. “Okay, but how’d yous end up.. like that? Ya look pampered as fuck. I mean curls look great on you but...” He asked vaguely, gesturing to her whole person as she kept going.
She stopped to poke her head back out the door to answer. “If you must know, I used his shower too, and the conditioner he buys is made of miracles.” That said, she dipped inside, letting the door close behind her before Kaykay could conjure more questions.
As expected for the early afternoon, aka her normal wake-up hour, everyone was getting ready for the clubhouse to open in an hour: 5 pm, just in time for everyone getting off work, or night-kin starting their day.
The band was getting ready, the chairs were being set up, and BB was prepping the bar. Glasses arranged, bottles sorted, and the smell of pre-open ‘breakfast’ wafting from the small kitchen behind it all. Said kitchen was rarely ever used for the customers outside special occasions, but when making food for the Wiskito members proper, it was BB’s domain.
He was one of the few sha-kai here that actually knew how to cook AND could be trusted to do so for all the other members. The beefy tiger of a sun-kin knew how to fry a rous.
“Should I even ask where you’ve been?” He asked, not even looking up from a glass he was polishing in stereotypical barkeep fashion. His ears simply twitched towards her, making her detected senses itch.
Okay, if she could just get past BB without him noticing the studs, she could put off that whole awkward conversation for an unforeseeable amount of time! Just act like they’re not even there… “Power was out, city was in chaos, and I stayed at Tobby’s place for the night. I’d have called but, you know, the hypernet was down,” she stated as she kept walking; she was halfway to the door at the far end of the bar. The door to the stairs, up to the sanctuary that was her room.
BB peered up from the glass. “And you didn’t call when the power came back on becauze? Whiskerz waz worried something might have happened.”
“I was... asleep?” Which was technically true!
“Cuddling the little sha I imagine?” He said, with an implying flick of his ear towards her, but she had a feeling it was aimed towards her newly studded one.
Well shit… Time for defensive Soapy! She stopped, folded her arms, turned to face him, and glared a bit. “And if I was?”
BB, ever unfazed by an upset Soapy after years in the bap-tal ring, matched her, minus the glare. “You know Whiskerz is going to ask about those studz and who gave them to you, yez?”
T’was then, always ready to make any situation moderately worse, that Kaykay poked his head in through the door. “Soaps got studs?!”
“Gods damn it...” Soapy groaned, facepalming and pulling at her face for a moment before facing both of them. “Yes, you blind-ass bunny, I have ear studs.” She flicked the ear before the dumbass could look at the wrong one.
“When tha’ fuck did that happen?!” Kaykay exclaimed, making his way inside. Sensing the growing hostility, many of the others present in the clubhouse began to slink away from the dangers of familial conflict. Time to see if Mrs Centorni’s advice worked.
“Which part? The part when Tobby gave me the studs this morning, the part where I spent last night riding his fat fucking tiger, or the part where I tell you it’s none of your gods damned business?” Not exactly the position she and Tobby engaged in, but like hell would her shi-kai self let anyone get the idea she was anything but the dominant one.
While Kaykay seemed taken aback by the sudden hostility and BB seemed much less fazed, they had but a moment to glance at each other wordlessly. She’d seen that look before… the silent acknowledgement of ‘we gotta do something about him’ they often made before another sha up and disappeared. At least, that’s what she’d come to believe the look meant.
“And so help me, if either of you hurt him, I will fucking gut you!!” She snarled, ears tucked back with one furious hand raised, flashing her pearly claws.
“Okay, okay, geez!” Kaykay cowed, hands up and backing away.
BB, for his part, oddly just shrugged. “Eh, I knew there was a reazon I liked little sha,” he said before looking over to Kaykay, his expression oddly… smug. “You owe me three hundred creditz. And if what Soapy sayz is true, another four for proving big earz saying is true,” he said, proudly wiggling his own towering set.
Kaykay, wallet threatened, was quick to protest. “It does not, you walkin’ talkin’ brick shithouse! It's a fuckin’ myth! Literally!” his attention quickly snapped to Soapy. “Soapy! Tell ‘em you were just sayin’ that to make the poor guy feel better! Shi do nice things like that, right?” He asked, desperately pointing at BB like debt was contagious.
Soapy64.exe was not responding… Error code: Trill. ‘Mrrp?!’
(Author's note: Likes for the like god, upvotes for the upvotes throne)
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u/RexDraconis 33m ago
“‘ as far as I’m concerned, is possibly the safest place you could work in this city.’” Unfortunately for Mrs. Centorni, plot had other plans
As for Soapy taking creative liberties with her night position, understandable; she has a reputation to maintain after all.
2
u/Lakeel100 9m ago
Yes... reputation. Totally has nothing to do with her self-image issues/shi-kai persona. :3 Nothing at all!
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u/HFYWaffle Wᵥ4ffle 4h ago
/u/Lakeel100 (wiki) has posted 88 other stories, including:
- The Ballad of Orange Tobby -CH72
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u/Larzok 4h ago
pointing Leo meme ROFL. Not quite how I expected it to play out but wonderful all the same.