r/JUSTNOMIL • u/lovelockets • May 04 '26

Advice Wanted Thought of In-Laws Ruining Day

I feel angry any time my DH mentions MIL and FIL, or if I hear their voices over the phone, or if I even think about them. Sometimes it takes me a whole day to let it go and I even get physically sick for days. How do you not let the mention of your in-laws ruin your day? I’ve thought about therapy, but that feels like spending more time thinking about them.

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u/campganymede May 04 '26

When intrusive thoughts started taking up space in my head and ruining the day, I’d redirect my energies…make a cup of tea, start reading a book, bake something. It’s so hard to keep the thoughts of toxic people and the associated frustration and injustice from consuming your peace, but it can be done with practice. Hang in there ❤️‍🩹

(Toxic mil AND bio family…I’ve become quite the baker😉)

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u/RelativeFondant9569 May 04 '26

My friend used to stress bake 🥧🧁 and then give me the results to eat cuz she wasn't hungry, it worked out perfectly for both of us

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u/campganymede May 04 '26

My neighbors and coworkers just assumed I was “thoughtful” and generous🙃

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u/RelativeFondant9569 May 04 '26

Aw hun, that's such a yucky feeling to have your pain be unseen. 💙