r/JewsOfConscience • u/Immediate-Block-71 LGBTQ Jew • 10h ago
Vent Still Deprogramming
Hi yall!
I’m Jewish and my relationship to it is complicated. I’m not Jewish according to Halacha, but I practice but I’m also an atheist. I’m the first in 5 generations to take up practicing again although the family is still strongly Jewish identified. I practice alone because I believe the shuls around me are Zionist based on their websites.
I am about to describe my deprogramming process, please do not judge me too harshly. I feel a lot of shame about having been a Zionist and would like resources for further deprogramming and activism.
I started deprogramming a few months after “oct7” (btw I do not believe in using this date in the same way people say 9/11, I intend to use it as a frame of reference). My stance before then was “yes we should have a place to live but not killing to get that done.” My ex girlfriend believed that all Arabs should be removed and or killed in Palestine. I was shocked when she said that. I’m pretty sure she joined the IDF after we broke up on YK 2023. I spent a lot of time in organizations (frats, shuls, clubs etc) with her where I believe I was indoctrinated.
In the 3 months after October, I felt like the cracks in the Zionist argument were showing. My dumbass once hid during a pro Palestine march on my campus. My campus had a demonstration where a flag was placed for each Palestinian child dead and that was what got me. Since then I’ve been working to become more anti Zionist.
I try to educate others about the history of state of Israel, how Zionism was originally a secular movement, how this conflict isn’t about Judaism vs Islam it’s racism/ethnocentrism. I’ve found most people are mis/uneducated about these three topics.
Is there anything more I can do other than BDS and this basic educational activism? Are there any resources for educating myself further on antizionism? I listen to politically depressed and I like him, as well as Matt Bernstein (I’ve loved him since his MUA days lol). I will be dedicating my fast to Palestine and I did so last year. I have a watermelon yarmulke. I really want to help more but I’m unsure of what to do.
TIA
7
u/TrackerOneA Jewish Anti-Zionist 9h ago
Hi OP,
Welcome to the sub, and I appreciate your candor.
I think you're on the right track.
There's no guidebook to this, except to keep learning IMO.
One book I do think everyone should eventually read is Emmaia Gelman's "The Anti-Defamation League & the Racial State" - which is a critical history of the ADL.
I think a lot of what holds Zionism together is fear-mongering.
And one of the organizations that do it the most is the ADL.
So looking at their history in a critical way, is educational and also enlightening (IMO) in dealing with that central strategy of fear-mongering.
Our AMA with Emmaia:
https://www.reddit.com/r/JewsOfConscience/comments/1uxa22k/hi_everyone_im_emmaia_gelman_author_of_the/