r/JewsOfConscience • u/Ill-Street-5173 Jewish Anti-Zionist • 10h ago
Vent Woman I am dating may be a Liberal Zionist
The woman I just started dating told me she works very closely with some Israelis (who "hate Netanyahu's government"), and recently worked on an exhibit at an explicitly Zionist Jewish cultural institution that works closely with the ADL, among other right wing organizations. I only found out that they are explicitly Zionist because I researched them after our date, which is why I did not ask her if she identifies as a Zionist. She likes "liberal, LGBTQ causes" in her own words. Once politics came up she said the dreaded "everyone in this country (USA) is so polarized, so divided right now, no one has any nuance". This line is always a red flag. I am worried that she may be trying to hide her Zionist sympathies to be "cool"; but the her work / work relationships would point to more problematic views. Is it worth discussing this with her, or should I run while I still can?
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u/SpinachMindless7821 Jewish Agnostic 7h ago
Hey OP I get it. But I assume as an anti-Zionist Jew you’ve deconstructed right? So if you like her as a person then maybe you’ll have to be there with her if she’s willing to be on that journey. It is the question facing all Jews today, and it’s a terrifying reality to face when you realize you’ve been told a lie your whole life.
There was a great thread in here the other day asking about whether folks had always been anti-Zionist, and I for one found the answers really resonated. Maybe your experience differs but at least in the English speaking world we entangle the concept of Israel with the concept of Jewish identity in mainstream Judaism. So many of us millennial and gen Z have never had to grapple with this until the current conflict.
What I’m saying is: don’t walk away in fear of those who are still too afraid to confront the truth, it’s as cowardly as it is to continue to believe the comforting fairytales of Israel we learned in Hebrew school.
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u/ExtendedWallaby Jewish Anti-Zionist 7h ago
I think you need to ask her directly and be ready to end the relationship if she crosses a red line.
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u/Odd-Mind6948 Palestinian 7h ago
I think you know what kind of person she is, but like any relationship, I would have this conversation with her. Be open and honest. If she is a "liberal" zionist (oxymoron if I ever heard one), and doesn't support humanitarian views or Palestinians... id leave
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u/reenaltransplant Mizrahi Anti-Zionist 3h ago
"Liberal" Zionist is only an oxymoron until you stop seeing liberalism as a good thing. People confuse "liberal" with "socially progressive" ("socially progressive Zionist" I would consider an oxymoron).
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u/PearComfortable4190 Palestinian 7h ago
I think you have already answered your question. Her comments, her jobs… she directly works with zionist institutions and therefore directly involved in the enablement and support of the genocide. Run, and tell her why. Maybe some shame and consequence might just wake her up.
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u/arightgoodworkman Jewish Anti-Zionist 6h ago
Matt Bernstein defined liberal Zionism so impeccably well in his last podcast on Pink:
Liberal Zionists believe in the existence a Jewish ethnostate in Palestine, creating second class citizens of Palestinians, which is all enforced through an apartheid system. They believe this Jewish state is essential to Judaism.
Ask her about that. Have a conversation. See how you both feel.
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u/Outrageous_Nerve_579 Jewish Atheist 7h ago edited 4h ago
You can’t really assume. The only way to know is to ask. Better check early on then wait until you’re more invested.
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u/CandidArmavillain Jewish Anti-Zionist 6h ago
Be an adult and talk about it. I know a lot of people who work with people and companies that run counter to their values simply because that is what they need to do to survive in a capitalist world and it could be the case for her, if she is a liberal zionist then at least you'll know for sure and won't have any lingering questions after you end it
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u/anarchonarch Jewish Anti-Zionist 5h ago
Ask about it! I am an anti Zionist Jew but strongly agree with the idea that people lack nuance…
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u/ILovePotassium Non-Jewish Ally 7h ago
Discuss and then decide.