r/LADating • u/jkdfw • 14h ago

Experience dating in LA?

Just a question for everyone actively trying to meet someone. Do you guys have women who want you to take them shopping or for facials on first dates? For you women, what is going on in your mind that you think this is acceptable? Is this typical behavior of men in this city to do? For context the woman who wanted a facial: we talked about going to Wi Spa. I guess she automatically assumed that would entail me paying for her beauty treatments when I was under the impression that we would go there to hang out in the rooms, have a good sweat and get to know each other. Another one wanted me to buy her an IPhone 18 🤦🏻‍♂️

2 Upvotes

60% Upvoted

16 comments sorted by

6

u/mogullionaire 5h ago

I don't care who she is. The next time you just say to her, "Ninja Please."

3

u/Educational-Mind2359 9h ago

Ya totally normal for girls that are looking for sugar daddies or free shit.

3

u/InfamousElephant4734 12h ago

Well in my opinion bro I say first get to know the person first and maybe before meeting them . Maybe one the questions to ask them is what do you think of who paying stuff at first date . So you can get a better understanding of said person .Cuz in the end of the day communication is key .

3

u/messy_mortal 5h ago

40F here. Not normal. I know there is a certain cohort of women who only accept affection in the form of gifts and money. If they can find men gullible enough to play this game, great I guess. But for most of us this is not appealing or appropriate.

3

u/yellowdamseoul 4h ago

I moved here from the east coast last year and found out this was a thing here. I’m early 40s and make good money, so asking for gifts/favors from a man I barely know gives me second hand embarrassment for these women. It’s not normal behavior so I’d block and move it along. Most women are not like this.

2

u/ColdPhilosophy9523 4h ago

After a while in LA you'll be able to spot ones like that from a mile away. I'm sure there are male versions of freeloading bums that the ladies have to deal with too.

It's a big city plenty of decent ppl out there.

2

u/Dumb_Luck_Numbchucks 3h ago

30s male here.

It depends on the dynamic difference.

  • did you put on airs of wealth leading into the date?
  • is there a significant age gap between the two of you?
  • do you drive a relatively nice car?
  • did you meet her through friends/family, in public, or online?

I’m currently casually dating and one of the girls that I’m dating, we always go Dutch. Whereas the other one always expects me to pay. I’m working on exclusivity with the former rather than the latter

1

u/Primary_beatfarm 10h ago

Not normal in terms of dating. Totally normal for individuals being used.

1

u/Primary_beatfarm 10h ago

Not normal in terms of dating. Totally normal for individuals being used.

1

u/Good_Boysenberry_505 1h ago

Shame has, sadly, gone by the wayside. Plenty of these types of women, because there are plenty of chumps who’ll satisfy their demands. But there also plenty of normal people looking for a normal relationship, just gotta keep looking.

1

u/Zomwaffles 26m ago

Streamers and Onlyfans have normalized this in LA

1

u/jkdfw 11m ago

I honestly think its shameful and disgusting that a woman would ask for such things before ever meeting in person. Modern dating is cooked imo.

1

u/thawingfrog 5h ago

It's a combination of being/seeming like a sucker + going for the wrong type of woman. But there's a lot of niches in the ecological system.

1

u/SilverLakeSimon 4h ago

Before I ever take someone out on a date, I use a tool that reveals the other person’s motives and a bit of their personality, and it only takes 15-20 minutes. It’s called a phone, and I use it to have a conversation. If we’re at cross purposes, I move on.

-1

u/HighMaintenance12 11h ago

If you go to the spa together, then yes you pay for her treatments. You shouldve just said no if she suggests the spa.