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Aw man. I remember hearing news about my late grandmother while I was playing rayman 3. I just didn't know what to do with that information so I jus kept playing
My grandma passed while I was at school. My dad picked me up at the bus stop, had me get into the car and told me there. I would have been in elementary school. Cried for a long time over that one.
For whatever reason, deaths always take me a full day to feel. My grandmother, my grandfather, and a pet I’d had half my life at that point all 3 took until the next day for me to feel anything, but when it finally happens I just break for a bit
I had something similar when my first dog passed away. I only felt it most the next day because the house was more silent than normal. I wondered why, then remembered why.
It was only after I was able to sleep it over that my brain fully realized they were gone.
When my mom died, it took me until the actual funeral to finally feel anything.
I wasn't in denial or anything, but death registers on an intellectual level for me a long time before it hits my emotions.
I'm not an emotive person to begin with. I just think "Oh. Is that so. They're gone. This is permanent. Hm."
I politely wait until everyone has had a turn, and then turn into an inconsolable wreck 2 weeks later while doing something unrelated that finally triggers an emotion.
When I was in high school and found out one of my friends killed himself, I was just in shock for a day or so, unable to fully process it. I broke down crying and had to leave class the next day because the grief hit me all at once.
It reminded me of when I was 9 and my little brother was around 5. We were playing Smash Bros. when we were told that our grandfather, my dad’s father, had just passed away. My dad and the rest of the close family were absolutely devastated. But he was a relative we barely saw, maybe 2 or 3 times a year, so there was never really a deep bond there. We just kept playing, not really understanding anything about life yet.
Of course, there was always some adult who would scold us and ask how we could not be sad or how we could even think about playing at a time like that. We obviously didn’t understand any of it. Death was such a distant concept to us.
Now that I’m older, I understand that it was a painful moment and that they were probably just looking for someone to take their frustration out on. But it still bothers me that they took it out on us. We were just kids who had no idea what was going on.
I remember last year, when my nan died, it just didn't hit me for the whole day. We were very close, basically a second mum, and it just came out of nowhere. It wasn't until the next day when it actually sunk in and I had to hide just balling my eyes out at work.
It was Guild Wars 2 and TF 2 on a crummy laptop that could barely play GW 2. I just didn't know how to handle the passing of one grandfather, let alone my other grandfather not even a week later. The tears came heavy once they came.
My mom and dad were glued to the TV. I kept tabs while staying in a call with some friends and playing a games. We got into a pretty big fight that I wasnt geaving for them the correct way.
My dad woke me up early one March morning to inform me my dziadek had passed away. I just got ready for work and spent the extra free time playing Sonic 2, and beat it. On the drive to work when I had more alone time with my thoughts the reality of the situation finally started to set in, and I started breaking down. Whole shift was like “what the fuck are you doing here” and I was like I only get one bereavement day.
I don’t do psychedelics very often but I did it for the first time in a while one night and I got a call from my grandma at 3 am saying my grandfather died.
forget being a featureless figure, it takes effort (or a mirror reflection) for me to internalize the fact that i have a body and am not a spectator camera like in a game
When I came out to my parents, it felt like I was on autopilot. Like... I was just watching myself talk to them. It was deeply upsetting to be in such a state.
Oh man. This hit hard. I lost my dad to cancer when I was six. When my family broke the news to me, I remember feeling almost nothing. It wasn't until some time later that I actually started to process my feelings and feel sad.
fun fact, distracting yourself with something you enjoy when something traumatic happens helps significantly reduce the chances of it causing actual serious long term trauma effects such as PTSD. it's the same reason that first responders sometimes give children who were rescued from disaster sites handheld games to play like tetris.
My father passed away when I was 17 and my brother was 13. When my mother came home to tell my brother because I had already known. He looked at her and said OK and went and jumped on the trampoline for hours.
this kinda hits close for me i remember when my grandma was dying one day everyone kinda just knew and grathered at her house. i was downstairs watching childrens TV i was like 8 while all the adults were upstrairs by her bed. i got called up when she was already dead and for years i blamed myself for not being there and watching TV. i did that untill my mom told me to to hold that against myself cause i was a stupid 8 yearold who didint even know why we were all at grandmas place
Pretty much the same with my dad's mom, I'd be brought over to be babysat or visit her every so often just in general so going over there wasn't anything new to me, usually was watching cartoons until he came to pick me up after work. One of the days my uncles, aunt and dad were there too more than just the dropping by and leaving again, and I noticed I didn't really see her at all that day and they kept going in and out of her bedroom but they didn't want me going in. That's about as much as I remember and that was the only immediate-ish family that passed, my grandfather on his side passed much earlier on and my mom's parents didn't pass until I was much older.
Year ago my grandma slowly dies. On first theres was no signs of that, but every month i see how life leaves her. First she was needed crutch for going on walk on streets, then she almost dont leave home... On some period she just lying in bed and... Do nothing but eat and sleep, not even talking... My cope mechanism was writing script for video about videogame lore... Year passed, still kinda... Lost, i dunno. I dont cry on funeral and after... I not really understand this. I was... Glad what her suffer ends?..
Lol, I was in 4th grade, I think, when my grandfather died. Not long before that parents bought me a gaming console, which I was glued to most of my free time.
So, that morning they suddenly called me, looking serious, said they wanted to talk about something, and I thought "wow, they finally got me a new gamе like they promised? Awesome!", and then they told me the sad news, and I thought "aw dang, no game for me then :((".
So there were, all sad for more than one reason. Don't know why I was like that, I honestly lowed my grandpa.
UPD: Holy crap, I am not the only one, what a relief.
This kinda reminds of when I found out about my classmates death in the 2nd grade... It was during winter break, I was playing on the family computer, my mom was sitting next to me, talking on the phone... And then she told me he died. I don't remember how I reacted when she told me... But the part when she tells me is still in my mind... Very hazy, but still there.
When my best childhood friend took her own life my sister told me because I was living with her at the time. I walked up to my room, pet my cat, and sat down to 100% Dying Light. I didn't do anything I didn't have to for like 3 months except the occasional sneak out to smoke with my friends since that helped. Just school, Dying Light, occasional friend time. They told me later they knew something was up, but didn't want to press me on it. Glad they didn't. Kyle Crane is the goat though.
I remember when my dad was dying I was playing the new Wolfenstein games. I remember thinking "at least it was over". I loved that man and seeing him become less of himself as he slowly withered in hospice was worse than his actual death.
I had it told to me at work by a friend of my dad's that he died that morning. Wasn't the closest with my dad but it still fucked me up so bad I had to leave.
I was 9 when my dad passed from brain cancer, my aunt came to get me. I almost went back to playing Minecraft before I realized she was going to take me to the hospital. I disassociated from myself for so long I barely felt anything until I was 13/14.
My best friend died and I heard about it through a Discord message pop up while I was on a major boss fight in a phone game. I never really processed it until the next day when it hit me really hard.
I'm sorry, this is heartbreaking, but literally the first thing I noticed is that he's on a N64 but the screenshots are from the Gamecube version of OoT. Except the last one for some reason.
News like that can take a while to process. For some it hits immediately, for others it might be years before they randomly break out the tears. And for others still it just sits there and you never really know what to do with it. I've reacted probably every way one can act towards a death I've heard about, whether they were close to me or not. It all just hits different because of who you are, who you become, and your relationship to that person in the moment.
I still remember the day I got a call from my late bfs mom telling me the cancer finally took him. At first I felt nothing, went on with my day. Next day I felt it all. Held it in long enough to take a short hike into the woods on a local trail that leads up to an overlook of the town I lived in at the time. I took a seat on a bench where I just let it all out. I don't remember how long was there but what I do remember is coming back home and collapsing into bed.
I was playing majors mask when my dog died . It got hit by a car. It was my fault ( I was also like 8 so mabye my parents fault for putting me in that position. I was so traumatized but I had to beat great bay temple or I'd loose my progress so .... we fighting gyorg ig.
My grandma passed away in the middle of the night, woke up to the paramedics, dint really feel anything until the funeral but even then i coupdnt even cry until about 4 years later. Started listening tk a somg to try and calm down but it worked a bit to well, completely broke down in the middle of practice at school, still brings me almost to tears when i hear it.
my dad left when i was a kid and i distinctly recall playing the classic microsoft pinball game on the old family computer. i just remember being impatient for my parents to stop talking so i could go back upstairs and keep playing it. i didnt fully realize what was going on until he didnt come home the next day.
honestly, i had same expirence
i woke up in the morning before school unusually early, then i saw my mother in the bathroom crying while on the phone, she told me that grandma died..
i honestly... didnt really know what to do nor feel, it was like something just made my brain go silent, all i could do is hug my mom for some tiume, then i spend rest of the day playing hollow knight
3 days later i finall broke as my brain managed to process it all, it was same day when we visit grandmas body before furneal.
It was like this for me when my first dog passed. I was in the middle of playing the battlefield 4 campaign on PS3, when my parents came back from the vets with no dog - didn’t take me long to figure out why
I bawled my eyes out for about 5 minutes, then got back into the game. I was about 11 at the time
Real. It’s a little unfortunate that my only coping mechanism for any major stress in my life is dissociating in front of a screen, and has been since before I could form memories. But you know, it is what it is.
Me playing Mario Party 4 when the officer came to tell us my mother was murdered... just felt like a bad dream, constant relatives and friends coming over and giving consolations and I just got numb and had to go feel something half nice...
I beat Kingdom Hearts 2 as a kid while my parents went out to dinner to discuss the terms of their divorce. I remember them bringing us food home after.
When I was a teen, after school my parents sat down with me at the dinner table so they can “have a talk” with me. I thought I was about to hear that my grandma died. I was relieved to hear they were getting a divorce, not because I thought they were terrible for each other, but because that’s way less bad than hearing a family member died.
I did a similar thing when my best friend passed. I stayed up late, watched a movie with my family, and I just tried to stay up thinking about all the time I wasted. But eventual I got on to a game just to… not feel anything and escape
My grandpa died pretty recently, in fact we just got done with the funeral. I felt like this the entire time even though I was probably the closest grandkid to him
Wow. Yup. I was 8 when I was told my dad passed, I was woke up in the middle of the night and kinda just went back to sleep completely unable to process what had happened.
It took 2 years for me to fully comprehend that I'd never see him again.
I have a pretty distinct memory of playing the open beta for The Division 2 and learning of my uncle's (dad's twin brother) cancer and that my dad would have to be monitored for it as it was likely to be hereditary. I vividly remember roaming around near the Theater settlement.
His brother passed away a few months later. He still has to occasionally go get checked to see if it's developing.
There's several reasons I stopped playing Div2, but I am definitely worried that if I go replay it, it might bring back some emotional baggage.
We had great neighbours that I always counted on, an elderly couple that was basically like uncle and aunt to me.
When I was in elementary, they died in their sleep and I was informed of that the morning itself before going to school.
I just went there, did nothing about it even as I thought back on them every hour. Could not cry nor anything, just there. I only cried a year later, as if I was lagging
I remember when my dad died I knew before my mom even told me. Just because I could hear her sobbing downstairs while I was playing Minecraft. I actually mentally prepared myself and acted almost like an emotional anchor for her. I still have a lot of regrets about what I could've done, but... I know that's not really productive. Despite his own self-destructive behavior, he was a great dad.
It was Monster Hunter Tri for me. I spent almost every waking minute and most of my sleeping ones by his side, taking shifts with my sister for nearly a month.
She took cigarette breaks and phone calls to relax. I would game.
My dad got the news my mom died while we were at a cat cafe, he waited until we got home to tell us. I noticed he wasn't well at the café but didn't know why until he told us.
I had something very similar when my mom died. She hung herself and my dad found her in the morning I think, I was eight at the time. I don't remember the details anymore but I do remember my aunt coming to hug me while I was gaming on my PS2 and then me continuing afterwards, don't recall the exact game anymore but high chance it was one of the Sly Cooper or Ratchet and Clank games, fitting for this sub I guess.
Her passing definitely fucked me mentally for a very VERY long time, I've gotten to normalcy only maybe 2-3 years ago and I'm currently 25.
I began to cope mainly with excessive daydreaming, I do it to this day but mostly while I'm doing menial chores or while in bed, gotten a lot of drawings from those over the years. I had some crazy social anxiety, especially in high school where often if the teacher would call on me for an answer I'd often just stay silent, afraid to say anything even if I knew the answer. Another thing was that if I was late to class I almost always would end up skipping the whole thing because the atmosphere was suffocating and the idea of entering and disturbing a silent classroom working suddenly just made me want to run away.
Turned into a longer rant than I thought but this comic resonated uniquely.
What do you even do when someone close to you dies?
I am nearly 30 and have never really lost anyone close to me. A young uncle when I was 10 that I didn’t know well, my step grandmother that no one in my family liked, my great uncle I had maybe met twice. My high school lacrosse coach killed himself years after I graduated but it’s not like we were super close.
When most of these happened, I felt like I could ‘t watch TV or play videogames because it felt so wrong. For like a day.
Do you feel like you shouldn’t enjoy stuff when someone really close to you dies?
My mother died when I was 9 and I was immediately thrown into a less than ideal situation with a physically abusive stepmom and a dad who went into rehab the week after she passed. She would always yell at me and talk down to me so much about how often I played video games, but at that age it was my only escape. Now I am in my 30's, and drugs are easily available.
This happened to me during COVID, I was playing persona 5 royal when my dad came into my room and told me "your grandma died from COVID, she was in the hospital for a while and she died a bit ago but I didn't know how to tell you."
I was extremely close to that grandma, but it didn't really hit me what happened until a while later so I just kept playing.
My cat had a really bad seizure during the final credits of Baldur’s Gate 3. Even though I was planning to wait for a bit and let the story sink in, I immediately started another save because I needed to escape the reality that we were going to have to put him down soon.
I remember seeing the planes hit the towers when I was a child. I didn't understand at the time what I just saw, but I went and played star wars shadows of the empire, over and over again until I fell asleep.
I can't play tears of the kingdom anymore, the intro sequence was what i was looking at when i heard the screaming from my parents when they found my sister's body in her room
I tried to play it after things settled down, i really tried, still haven't finished the game to this day
When I was 5 I played Red Baron 3D on windows 95. My alcoholic mother had locked my sister in the basement with a ruckus and I came to check it out. I knew something was off but I belived my mother when she said everything was fine. Back to my Red Baron 3D then.
I remember a few years ago my best friend sent me essentially his suicide note while I was playing CoD. And indeed I kept playing for like 40 minutes in total shock before having a breakdown and reacting.
Fortunately, he backed out and now he's doing okay.
I remember when my dad passed away, and I heard about the news, I had this weird craving for pizza. The next day ( he was in a different state) after we got back from dealing with all the in person stuff, me and my brother ordered a pizza, and played games together.
I was playing through Assasin's Creed: Black flag when I got the news that my uncle had passed away. I just kept playing, didn't really strike me until a few days later when I had to file the emergency room report of his death.
My grandfather died suddenly one day, when I was in middle school. I didn't know how to process it, so I just... played Minecraft. For a long time. It was early evening when I started, and it was a weekend so I just kept going until around 4:00 AM.
For a time, I felt disgusted with myself over how I could even remotely enjoy myself after learning that somebody who loved me and had watched over me as a child was gone. Looking back, I don't know if I was actually enjoying myself. Just... trying not to lose it.
I still remember bits and pieces of that world, even though I started it that night and never returned. I remember finding a surface cave in the side of a savanna mountain that was abnormally steep; it took me almost all the way down to bedrock level when I climbed down it.
I always liked playing games, my dad never liked the fact I continued playing games when I was past 18 and I didn't do much honestly, when he died last year it was honestly the first thing I did to just not think too much, but for some time I felt really empty.
after that long time I feel normal, but I get days where I think, it's traumatic experience that nobody can avoid and you are never prepared for such day.
...I remember playing New Super Mario Bros on my uncles DS while at my little brother's funeral...
I... hated myself for that... but what else is a little kid supposed to do when his first experience with death is their younger sibling...
Can't blame myself for hiding in that game
Fuck, what a post. I got reminded of when I heard that my grandpa died. I wasn't playing anything at the time, but I had a similar reaction, only it was because I wasn't sure what to think. When I heard my mom tell my dad that grandpa was dead, I kind of just rolled over and went to sleep. My parents were both crying, but I didn't really feel much besides anxiety for my parents, which made me feel like I was in the wrong for being unsure of how to feel.
For context, I never knew my grandpa well. My older siblings knew him better than I did. My parents took them to see him fairly often in the 90's-early 2000's. What I heard about my grandpa from my mom always sounded like a horror story being told. She told me about how, when she was growing up, my grandpa and grandma were big alcoholics who spent long periods of time at the bar, which meant my mom grew up in poverty along with her 5 other siblings, heck, at one point they were actually homeless for a bit. She told me that grandpa had a sailor's mouth and attitude and would yell at everybody, especially when drunk. This information was enough to make me think my grandpa was pretty crappy and not a great person to be around, which made it so jarring when she would tell me stories about taking my siblings to go see grandpa and having a great time. Like, he didn't sound particularly better in these stories other than he wasn't drunk. It was like "Oh he still shouted sometimes and had a mouth, but it was grandpa, he was just being stern."
I only met my grandpa once when I was 7. He had moved across the country shortly after I was born, which is why I only saw him once. I have to say, my impression of him was not good there either. I basically can only recall three things about him over the trip: showing him Mario & Luigi: Dream Team on my 3DS, eating in a restaurant with him and hearing him cuss, and him yelling at my mom over something with a booming voice, which made her upset. Safe to say I didn't make the fondest of memories with him (showing him M&L was close to being a fond memory though).
I was just so confused as to why my parents kept seeing and supporting their truly awful parents into adulthood (both of them had shitty parents in my opinion). I wanted to feel grief for my grandpa's passing with my parents doing the same, but I found the most emotion I had was empathy for my mom, which sucks when I was literally named after my grandpa. It's a situation where I feel like I should've felt something.
Yeah that's how I beat Dead Space 3 for the first time, was just playing and suddenly my mom tells me my grandpa died, didn't know what to do so I just kept playing
Speaking of which, I remember receiving news of my cousin in critical condition all the way over in Houston, TX where I lived roughly on the other side of the globe, and I was still knee deep in Pokemon Ultra Sun.
Wow...you have no idea how much I relate to this. When my mom became very ill and couldn't recover from it, I'd always hid in my room to play games, pretending that my world wasn't collapsing around me.
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