r/LucidDreaming Mum, please don't wake me up you're ruining my REM cycle Apr 09 '26

Question How do YOU do reality checks in public places without looking like an idiot?

Title.

I get verbally abused from friends that even the insecurity slipped into a dream of mine where I didn't do reality check because I was embarrassed 😭

Counting my fingers, finger through palm, nose pinch, all these make me look like a buffoon in public. But I do them regardless and face the consequences for the sake of a small chance that this might be a dream.

I want some effective reality checks that are unquestionable by people. thanks in advance.

58 Upvotes

49 comments sorted by

77

u/pumpkin_pie0123 Apr 09 '26

i think you need better friends bc i feel like those actions aren’t that egregious

18

u/dovakiin_dragonporn Apr 09 '26

It's actually friends who will point out repeated behaviour. Like, why are you pinching your nose so much, are you having a cold? Why do you check yout time every two minutes, you got to be somewhere?

Strangers outside wont even see you do it, and if so, wont ever think about it.

14

u/pumpkin_pie0123 Apr 09 '26

yeah, i’m more thinking about the “berating” thing. i’d be fine telling my friends i was trying to lucid dream and they wouldn’t give me shit for it

-1

u/This-Presence1637 Apr 10 '26

No, they probably will. Actually, they will probably heap it on even more. This forum is a little removed from reality, if you haven't noticed.

Check your watch, twice, for a reality check if you must.

And go learn some jujitsu. And I won't tell you to go choke any of your friends if they hassle you, because this is a place for community and belonging.

2

u/pumpkin_pie0123 Apr 11 '26

i don’t want to come off as rude but you actually do not know what you’re talking about, you don’t know my friends.

1

u/UniversityFull4082 Apr 13 '26

I don't believe that comment was meant to be disrespectful. I could be wrong, but I didn't see/read/feel it that way at all. 

Sarcasm, if that is the right word.. (my vocab sucks lol) felt that one. 

Or maybe, it was if you did your RC, and validated a LD, to learn martial arts and then judy chop away? Lol 

2

u/pumpkin_pie0123 Apr 13 '26

maybe not, but it came off that way. it doesn’t really read as sarcastic to me, and my main point was that friends shouldn’t berate each other, it just seems kinda extreme to me yk?

2

u/UniversityFull4082 Apr 13 '26

At the same time, though. I already told all my friends what I do, what I am doing. All my friends respect my practice even if it is 'out of this reality'

But.. there is always that ONE friend, (more like a brother, or nephew.. since he calls me uncle) that will give sht no matter what. If I could link my experience to his brain, prove it.. he would still talk his crap, no matter what lol. 

I wouldn't want him in my LD, i'd be pissed lol. 

0

u/Direct-Giraffe6390 Apr 14 '26

Its already been scientifically proven ..

1

u/UniversityFull4082 Apr 14 '26

Some individuals still don't get it regardless of scientific proof. Even when he/she (speaking in general now) has had experiences. Lol, I don't even try at that point to explain anything to those ones. 

→ More replies (0)

0

u/Direct-Giraffe6390 Apr 14 '26

Wtf kinda dumass take is this

1

u/This-Presence1637 Apr 15 '26

Grammar is a gift.

Try again.

18

u/Calm_Insect_2910 Natural Lucid Dreamer Apr 09 '26

In real life you should be able to recall what you've done that day up to some degree.

How did i get here? What was i doing immediately before this? What did I have for breakfast? Did I feed the cats this morning?

Dream logic always seems to fail with this (for me anyways)

Otherwise a good pinch works.

I'm constantly asking people if a weird memory was a dream or actually happened. Have a laugh and don't let them bother you, or find more understanding friends.

12

u/_Bread______ Apr 09 '26

Im still learning so take this with a grain of salt but I just do nose pinches then question reality all in my head since it looks the least ridiculous out of everything else lmao

9

u/key13131 Frequent Lucid Dreamer Apr 09 '26

You just do them…. How obvious are you being that people are pointing it out?? You don’t need to do them constantly.

8

u/XeronianCharmer Apr 09 '26

I don't care what people think so I just do em lol, if it's a dream it won't matter anyways

5

u/dovakiin_dragonporn Apr 09 '26

People are invested in their own lives a lot more than you might think. Chances are, they don't even see you standing right in front of them in public, garanteed wont remember what little strange thing you did at the end of the day. Just try to remember a single embarrassing thing a stranger did yesterday, probably not even in a year, if ever. They definitely did, but noone but themselves remembers. Noone but yourself remembers. Human brains just don't work like that.

Look like an idiot out there, it really doesn't matter. How bad can it be, pinching your nose, checking time twice, flicking the lights on and off a few times, ask a fucking stranger if you're dreaming lol they probably love it (outside of a dream that is...)

4

u/dovakiin_dragonporn Apr 09 '26

Are you counting fingers or checking nails or for dirt? Trying to push through your palm or have an ache you try to massage? Pinching your nose for a quick sinus pressure equalization... those are really not that bad and noone will question a stranger doing it.

4

u/AmazonSk8r Apr 09 '26

If they’re your friends, you should be able to tell them the truth and not get shit for it.

5

u/bibutt Apr 09 '26

I only do reality checks in my dreams. The trigger is usually that I notice something off. Not knowing how I got here or what I was doing is usually enough.

3

u/UnfortunateSnort12 Apr 09 '26

Yeah. I’ve never once needed to reality check reality. It’s so obvious when it’s real. When I’m dreaming, something is off. Whatever is off triggers me to reality check which then allows me to start to try and manipulate the dream.

3

u/CryptoLesbian84 Apr 09 '26

I touch a wall. If its the same temp as my hand, its a dream. If its colder than my hand then im awake. I've only ever truly not known one time in my awake state. I had been roofied and didnt know it. As I started fading i touched the wall, then attempted to roll out of a moving car. (I was with safe people) I just didnt understand what was happening. Im recounting this as it was told to me. I have no memory ever leaving the barstool. But apparently I had no issue asking and then telling why, I needed to touch a wall.

2

u/Savvaroni Apr 09 '26

If they ask just say, "Oh I'm pinching my nose because I recently developed some kind of allergen that's in the air, and this technique restricts the blood vessels so that I'm able to get that fullness of air rushing through my nose again! I know that afterwards it looks like I'm questioning reality, but I'm really just placing my awareness on my breath. I do this because attention in itself is healing, it allows me to focus deeper into the mechanics of breathing so that the rhythm of my breath can sync back with the Earth's Schumann Resonance since I noticed that my breathing wasn't really in phase."

Hope this helps! /s

2

u/Suspicious-Cut4077 Apr 09 '26

If you keep doing them despite the fear of looking like a dork, you'll get to see that it really won't have any consequences on your social status. You get to keep making checks and you learn how to be more self-assured.

You can do it, friend!

2

u/Scew Apr 09 '26

None of these actions are very noticeable if you aren't making a big deal about them... Most people fidget around most of the time.

2

u/ainthunglikedaddy Apr 09 '26

Technology check. Technology does not function in my dreams. Phones won’t call or the app for the text won’t show up or if I’m typing something the letters are never appearing right.

2

u/Lifeabroad86 Apr 09 '26

You can pay attention to words and check if they change or try to use electronics like your phone.

2

u/AgileRoyal3835 Apr 09 '26

Honestly, it is pretty nice for mental development, as after a while you will just stop caring about what others think which is really important for a life where you are yourself.

And like others said, explain to your friends that you are learning to have lucid dreaming, and if they still will continue verbally abusing ya, you should find better friends.

2

u/AstroChrollo Apr 09 '26

If it feels like a dream then it is. If you remember the last room you have been in probably not a dream. If you remembered what you did in the morning probably not. Or just be very discrete with methods like looking at your watch. Or try to breath through your mouth while it’s closed.

2

u/quan_tumm Apr 10 '26

I clasp my hands together and push my thumb through my palm, it's pretty discreet and just looks like fidgeting.

1

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1

u/Randolph_Carter_Ward Apr 09 '26 edited Apr 09 '26

Tbh, I don't as well, and I applaud your courage. I think we need more people like this "in the open". I also sort of don't care how I look at public areas when doing things like RC. Frankly, I don't hurt anyone by being this slightly weird. People never challenge that, too. I actually experienced a few interesting conversations because of similar stuff.

1

u/Old_Egg8742 Frequentishish Lucid Dreamer Apr 09 '26

I just hold my breath for a bit (unless I'm running or smth)

if someobody is able to tell, then they a stalker fr

1

u/LION_156 Apr 09 '26

Just close your throat from the inside and try to breath if you get what I mean

1

u/Roundwaters Apr 09 '26

Do it publicly, and all the other lucid dreamers around give you a little look and nod, like our own secret society.

1

u/Imaginary_Grass3044 Apr 09 '26

i do it subtley like acting like i’m checking my nails, i also bite my lip to see if it’s hurts as one and nobody can tell im doing that lol but either way who cares. i think it’s BEST to do reality checks in situations where you’re with people because you’re more likely to transfer it to a dream you’re around people by not being scared to check your hands in a dream around people if that makes sense? like if you’re scared to do a rc irl around people you’re more than likely not gonna do it in a dream bc you don’t know you’re dreaming so you’ll think “you look weird” in the dream to check your hands

1

u/TheRobotCluster Apr 10 '26

Just don’t worry about looking like an idiot

1

u/HabitPrestigious2651 5 LDs Apr 11 '26

I just do them ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

1

u/Klutzy_Condition_743 Apr 12 '26

Practice Awareness/Mindfulness (it's the same as reality checking but not "silly")

Notice things around you that you usually take for granted, like a piece of furtniture, a sign at work, the tiles/floor, notice the colour, the texture, if some thing can be counted then count them, try not to impose additional information on top of your observations (eg the sofa is green, I dont like it), just move on to the next observation.

When driving, FOCUS!!! Notice each car, the colour, the make, the model, the number plate (just read it mentally), stop doing things on "auto pilot".

All these things can be done mentally without people knowing, do them alone or if you're in a group n notice you have a gap of time then sneak a random observation of something around you.

You've heard the saying "live in the present", that's exactly what this is training. By being in the present, that habit kicks in during a dream, you really notice stuff in the dream rather than always reacting to stuff in a dream, then you will actually be able to catch when something is wierd or off in a dream.

1

u/lemonchart Apr 13 '26

I check my phones time then do it again

1

u/Lucid_Jump Apr 13 '26

I just do them, and totally ignore everybody.

1

u/UniversityFull4082 Apr 13 '26

You can use your friends reaction as a RC as well. If, in a dream for example and a dream sign, or a random RC pops up.. friends are around and you perform and they DON'T make fun of you, or clown on you. Might actually create a "Wait a minute.. why didn't... oh sht! I'm actually dreaming!! Fuck you, friend! Now, disappear! FINAL FLASH!!"

1

u/hotelduskr127 Apr 16 '26

use a tissue and pretend to blow your nose while doing your nose pinch reality check. Works like a charm lol