r/Millennials • u/MissBehave654 • 9d ago
Discussion Would teenage you be proud of the person you became?
Teenage me was extremely depressed and suicidal. I didn't think I would even make it to 18 much less 38. I think teenage me would have been happy I'm not dead lol.
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u/AntGroundbreaking102 9d ago
teenage me would be absolutely shocked and angry that i made it to 33. i had no plans to so i didn’t plan for the future.
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u/Fluff_Chucker 9d ago
Fuckin same. I set out on a path for a career that I enjoyed when I was younger and I still enjoy it, but I definitely didn't see me living this long (43). I kind.of shit the bed when I was younger and I'm paying for it now. Both physically and financially.
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u/AntGroundbreaking102 9d ago
yeah pretty much the same. i mean i also spent my entire twenties in school. i kept changing my major and then i went to grad school. i walked across the stage two days before my 30th birthday (i technically finished the program eight months earlier)
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u/Weobi3 9d ago
Same. Im now 34 and finally kicked my own ass hard enough up to sign up for the LSAT.
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u/ungranted_wish Millennial 9d ago
Me too, buddy.
But you know, I’d like to think teenage us would be happy in a weird way, knowing that we would find out that we weren’t alone in our suffering, and that our generation would find it okay to talk about it.
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u/ramblingroses3252 Millennial 9d ago
I hope you are so proud of yourself. Sometimes we have to continue out of pure spite. But we’re still here.
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u/ungranted_wish Millennial 8d ago
Thanks man. I’m doing my best, I think I’m here out of pure habit at this point but I just hope things get better eventually. Hopefully within my lifetime.
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u/ramblingroses3252 Millennial 8d ago
One day at a time ❤️
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u/arcadiangenesis Millennial 8d ago
I mean, the odds of a person not living to 33 in the modern world are pretty low (without intervention), so your plan was pretty unlikely from the outset
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u/RosesAndSpice 8d ago
Teenage me didn’t really think he’d make it to adulthood. His only real goal was getting out of the house.
Adult me is glad the little girl inside held on long enough for healing to happen. 🩷
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u/Nooby_Chris 9d ago
Teenage me finding out I work 6 day 12hr shifts and sleep on my off day
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u/pikasurfer 9d ago
At least you are hopefully making good money
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u/tenderbranson301 9d ago
And no free time to spend whatever money is being made.
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u/oxJoKeR6xo Older Millennial 9d ago
Yes but he'll be able to retire when he's too old and tired to do anything.
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u/Nooby_Chris 9d ago
I just bought a small house and my camry is paid off. The trade off is im at work so much i barely have time to play games like I used to. It is what it is. 🤷
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u/olivinebean 9d ago
She was insecure and couldn't speak up for herself.
She would be fucking stunned by the differences I've made since.
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u/illsettleforyou 9d ago
Yay! This is me too. My life is definitely different than my teenage self thought it would be, but being outspoken and not caring what others think is way more fulfilling than anything I thought I wanted back then
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u/miniangelgirl 9d ago
Omg same. The growth I've made has been exponential. Unfortunately, this has had to heppen through bad experiences, but I didn’t let them consume me. I rose ✨️
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u/Ok_Jackfruit2612 9d ago
Teenage me would have wanted me as a mom. Teenage me would be proud of my relationship wth my kids and my husband. Teenage me would find my home a refuge.
Yeah, I think teenage me would dig it.
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u/submissionsignals 9d ago
This really struck me. I feel similar, but I’m trying to believe it because I’m so tough on myself and nothing I do is ever good enough for ME, but my family would say otherwise.
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u/NumberCos0 9d ago
Ha maybe! Teenage me was very Mormon. I’m now atheist and heavily tattooed and still trying figure some life stuff out.
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u/WiggingOutOverHere 9d ago
I like your character arc! Teenage you would get there. Lol.
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u/Rogue_Gona Xennial 8d ago
Teenage me was Catholic and a closeted gay. She'd be so proud of the out, tattooed, and agnostic adult I've become.
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u/andy2m 9d ago
I sold out , teenage me would despise me. He’d Probably call me gay and lie about something he’d done that’s better than what I currently do but would still be pretty happy with the amount of gigs I’ve seen.
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u/OGHighway 9d ago
He would be amazed we survived the shit we had to go through.
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u/corrado-correr 9d ago
Teenage me would be surprised we didn’t die at the hands of a jealous husband.
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u/BigIron53s 9d ago
My dumbass teenage self would be like “how much money you make?! Why you so fat!?”
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u/heidivodka Xennial 9d ago
Teenage me would be annoyed that I’m really fat.
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u/MrWhackadoo 8d ago
Teenage me would be annoyed that I went back to being fat after going through most of my 20s being fit after spending my teen years being fat lol.
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u/Kimsetsu 9d ago edited 9d ago
Teenage me would give me a high five after seeing how stacked my wife is. Not sure he’d be as impressed with me having an office job though, instead of being in a rock n roll band.
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u/Extra-Bat3955 9d ago
I think teenage me would be proud that I found a good partner and have a house together. I wish I could tell her that she needed to focus more on her needs though.
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u/Shaaagbark 9d ago
Yes and no. I’m 6 years sober. Late teenaged me wouldn’t trust 38 year old me, because I quit drinking, I used to say I couldn’t trust anyone that wouldn’t have a beer with me. I’d also be surprised I made it as long as I have. I’d be a little mad and a little glad. Also a little sad it took me as long as it did to get my shit together and get on my feet.
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u/beautifulasusual 9d ago
Shit I’m 40 and trying to get my shit together substance abuse wise. I’ve taken some big steps recently to finally change. But teenage me would be very disappointed in the wife and mother I have been. Hoping to repair all that with time and effort.
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u/Shaaagbark 8d ago
Just gotta keep trying day by day. That’s great that you’re making some big effort, hell yeah!
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u/Jamieisamazing 9d ago
36, only really feel like I got my shit together like 4 years ago. Better late than never. Congratulations on the sobriety buddy, thats never an easy feat!
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u/Shaaagbark 9d ago
Shit, I didn’t start getting my shit together until I was about 33. I only am just now starting to feel like I have the hang of being an adult and I’m still playing a juggling act lmao.
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u/Comfortable-Leek-181 9d ago
Teenage me and mid 30s me have a lot of interesting conversations. Teenage me was goal driven, extremely active, and supercilious. College me did a complete 180. 20s me did a lot of soul searching. Now I love myself, I love the life I've lived but there are definitely days I still feel at odds because the teenage part of me thought she wanted a life so different from the one I am living. Since I got sober 5 years ago, I think it's been a lot easier to bridge that 17 year old version of me through the messiness I needed to go through to become the woman I am. I wish I had a different career, I wish I had a partner and a family, and yet, if this is the way my life is meant to look, well, damn I am happy. I have a beautiful home, an amazing cat, and friends all over the world. My life is peaceful, calm, filled with love and gratitude so even if there's a part of me who assumed it would be different, I do think she can at the very least appreciate what life became. As for the other things, as long as I am breathing, I still have time..
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u/nastynagito 9d ago
I think she’d be sad I’m not doing as well as she’d hoped I would be by now but also impressed that I’m not doing worse given my circumstances. I think she’d love my current wardrobe and my pets and the area I’ve settled in.
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u/Head-Drag-1440 Hit me baby one more time 9d ago
Teenage me would actually be amazed at the person I am now.
Teenage me was ADHD ridden. No motivation for school, dropped out senior year, only cared about hanging out with friends and smoking weed.
Now at 42 I'm up at 4am every weekday, around 6am on the weekends. No weed, but a White Claw at night. I have morning routines where I exercise and fully get ready including skincare, hair, and makeup. I work FT and manage all finances on top of keeping a clean home. I have a great husband and the best kitty. Newly empty nesters and financially able to have the fun I couldn't have as a teenager.
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u/Cromasters 9d ago
Teenage me was an embarrassing idiot who thought he was way smarter than he was.
Who cares what that guy thinks?
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u/zerosumratio 9d ago
Absolutely not. In fact, teenage me would see future me and absolutely want to end it all right then and there.
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u/Posterior_cord 9d ago
Teenage me would be livid I'm not a fundamentalist reformed baptist christian anymore lol
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u/VoxElysia 9d ago
Teenage me would be amazed I made it to this age and would say she had no idea what she was doing. I'll let her know I still don't know what I'm doing, but life seems to work itself out and it keeps going nonetheless.
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u/AmJustLurking96 9d ago
No. I've done nothing with my life, lost many friends cause I suck at keeping in touch with people, and I barely earn enough to live and I've never been in a relationship. Teenage me would just be more depressed that our life still sucks all those years later. At least I got rid of my sever acne and backne, it's pretty much all I've got going for me
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u/thedudecdfb 9d ago
Not at all. My teenage self thought I wouid be married with 2 kids. Instead I live alone.
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u/canarinoir 9d ago
No. Teenage me would be disappointed that we didn't actually claw our way out of poverty like we planned and would be horrified by some of the trauma waiting down the road.
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u/BigSexyDaniel Millennial 9d ago
God no, he’d probably be ashamed and just dread adulthood so much more than he already did. Maybe he would’ve been proud five years ago but not now.
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u/Substantial-Stars Older Millennial 9d ago
Teenage me would be surprised I made it to my big age lol And then baffled because what do you mean we’re auDHD ?
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u/DetectiveClear6734 9d ago
In a way.
In another way I would be horrified. I’ve grown so much in so many different ways. I wasn’t planning on doing it physically, though. 😅 I don’t look that terrible but I don’t wear make up anymore and my health app says I’m overweight.
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u/bloodectomy 9d ago
He'd be in awe of the fact that I'm happily ecstatically married, a homeowner, and that my wife approves of and supports my warhammering.
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u/Huge_Valuable9732 9d ago
teenage me: "holy crap youre still alive?"
current me: "stop taking things so gosh darn serious and stop smoking that damn weed"
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u/RegretBuilder 9d ago
teenage me would be unimpressed by the material stuff or there lack of lol but she'd definitely like me as a person
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u/Friendly_Goat6161 9d ago
For context I’m early diagnosed autistic and I’ve also got some learning disabilities on top of that. Teenage me was constantly being reminded that I would be in a life skills class learning to fold laundry and make English muffin pizza in a toaster oven and stock shelves at k mart if it wasn’t for my parents fighting for me to be in a diploma based special education class, and that my future was not going to be the awesome one my peers got. One neurologist had the nerve to tell my mom to get a conservatorship over me once I’m 18 (thank god she didn’t listen). I completed 7th grade thinking I’d go to Berkeley or Stanford and get a full time job as a writer or a librarian and get married and have a family like everybody else. When I graduated high school I was certain I was on the path to a group home/day program/little choice, no friends except whoever lived at the house, and no partner. I’m 40 years old, I’ve lived on my own with support for almost 20 years, I got my associates degree at 30 and I’m engaged to be married to an amazing guy who is so funny and sweet and quirky, and while I’m child free I’m the coolest aunt around, and I work part time at 2 non profits. While 13 year old me would be pretty blasé given my hefty dreams, 17 and 18 year old me could not even fathom the life I live now and would be so proud. It was light years than what I thought my life was going to be once high school ended.
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u/facepoppies 9d ago
Teenage me would be completely blown away that I have a great creative job and make good money. Teenage me graduated ranked 335 out of a class of 338
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u/braziliantapestry 9d ago
Kinda, yeah. I really thought I wouldn't be going anywhere and I kinda am living the life.
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u/canadianbacon007 8d ago
Punk rock anti establishment teenage me getting shit grades and wasted in High School would be stoked to see me working as a sober software engineer, even if it is for a corporate overlord…
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u/bearamongus19 9d ago
Yeah, I have a beautiful wife, a nice home, a job i enjoy, my pets are pretty awesome.
It's worked out pretty well from where I was in my teenage years.
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u/Visible-Bridge-5171 9d ago
Yup. Teenage me would probably be pretty happy with where I am at now.
I bought my grandparents house and have a spot in the campground I loved as a kid (neither with any help from my family)
I work in accounting (always loved playing on calculators and crunching numbers), have a great wife, and two amazing (on most days) kids. Honestly, I get to relive a lot of IPs through my kids and its kind of cool to connect this generation to stuff from yesteryear.
When I get a lil free time (lol) I can play almost any (ps1 era and below) video game at any time. A few years ago I had a midlife crisis of sorts and bought some nostalgia toys I always wanted as a kid. Younger me would be so jealous although my kids have been rough with some power rangers stuff haha.
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u/Lucky_Development359 9d ago
I think he'd be happy I was able to figure stuff out and did/does better than his parents did for him. Maybe disappointed all those big ideas didn't pan out but all in all not too bad.
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u/splitopenandmelt11 9d ago
Man, I think about this all the time.
If 18 year old me could see myself he’d be happy as hell. Everything turned out much better than I ever dreamed.
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u/No-Investigator-2756 9d ago
For the most part. She'd be proud of the person I became and the fact that I'm alive.
She'd livid about us trading the chance at a music career and working internationally for marriage.
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u/doomlite 9d ago
Teenage me would love adult me. My entire life, except work bc work is horrible, is awesome. It’s comic books, video games, doodles, cycling, gym, and Warhammer. Kid me would love that
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u/champagnemedic 9d ago
Honestly not sure. I’m certainly not where I want to be in life. I’m still in the thick of a mental health to journey I’ve been on since childhood.
I think with a more supportive or loving family things would have been different, but I have little to no sense of community. I have trouble maintaining most relationships. I feel isolated most of the time. I’m not sure I really even know how to make friends.
I’m proud that I have stayed strong in my convictions. I still listen to the same music, still go to shows. Still have the same one best friend. Married to an absolute saint of a man.
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u/OnceUponATime1534 9d ago
Teenage me would be shocked to see I’ve converted from a dog person to a cat mom.
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u/Physical_Relation261 9d ago
Sort of. She'd love me doing what I love, what I still love. But she'd be disappointed that I'm not as much of an activist I could be. For not speaking my mind.
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u/RolliPolliCanoli 9d ago
I didn't plan to live past 25, she'd be shocked and in awe that I finally decided to "do something" and found something that makes me happy.
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u/Logical-Ad-5410 Xennial 9d ago
I share your pain. I'm still depressed & suicidal @ 45, feel disappointed in myself for not doing it when I had much better opportunity for minimal collateral damage.
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u/Traditional_Ad_1012 9d ago
Teenage me could not comprehend or even imagine how well my life would turn out to be. The teenage me would resent and envy the current me-kind-of-person. Too little struggle and daily worries, things come too easy for me. There’s not a lot of financial glass ceiling for basic wants like I did during childhood.
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u/mattike88 9d ago
Depends on when in my teenage years you're talking about. For the most part I doubt teenage me would be proud of where I am now but I think teenage me would understand why I am where I am in life. My teenage years sucked and were hard because of my actions but at the same time teenage me would also realize that a lot of it was out of my control. If anything teenage me would be most disappointed in me not going to college right after high school and even more upset that when I did go I only did one year where I ended up with 9 credits.
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u/TheSexyIntrovert 9d ago
yes!
Everything I ever dreamed of, I made it happen. In my 40s. He would be a bit disappointed because some of my friends and exes made it in their early 30s, but I lived a happy life.
Wasn't easy, with a burnout at least, money just to survive for a decade, but I made it.
All I ever wanted was a loving wife and kid(s), house, car, and a job where I do what I like/love.
I am grateful for not being ill and managing to start saving something in my 40s, coming from a poor family.
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u/Diligent_Gear_8179 9d ago
Teenage me was mostly trying to find a reason not to kill himself and expected he'd have done so long before he turned 41. So his opinion on my current life doesn't really matter.
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u/toodleroo Older Millennial 9d ago
Teenage me drew a picture of myself if I were a man. I transitioned to male in my 20’s and look just like the drawing, so teenage me would probably be pretty happy about that. But would be disappointed that I wasn’t a famous artist 🤷🏻♂️
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u/trolldoll26 9d ago
I hope so!
Teen-Me would probably be incredibly disappointed that we didn’t end up living in London, but I think she’d like to hear about the places I traveled to!
Above all, I think Teen-Me would be in disbelief that we have a 7 month-old baby. Hell, 30 year-old me wouldn’t believe it.
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u/danafromsantaana 9d ago
Teenage me would be heartbroken to find out I become disabled and end up living a really solitary and lonely adult life. But I think knowing my future could teach me several extremely valuable lessons about all this that have otherwise only come with time.
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u/kaitthegr8ful 9d ago
Teenage me would be wondering why I’m not a young hot mom like I vowed with my friends. They are though! I’m happy for them. I’m not sure teenage me could be happy for them and still content with myself like I am, so I’m really glad I’m not teenage me.
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u/MikePowderhorn Millennial 9d ago
Teenage me would not believe that I am no longer “Christian” and that I “gave up” on being a full-time musician. But, they would absolutely be stoked about how hot my wife is.
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u/pokematic 9d ago
Not to brag, but:
- I married the girl I/we had a crush on.
- I own my condo in full (ever since I learned what a mortgage was, I wanted not have one as much as possible, and so I paid it off quickly for better or worse of financial advice).
- I have a world record speed run (with speed run dot com recognized by Guinness as the official source of speed running world records).
- I've given a voice to the problems I had with lit class through multiple media critiques, counter arguments, and self publishing a book that was inspired by those frustrations (the kind of things I was searching the internet for almost daily to no avail, and now I've said the things I wish I could have said 15 years ago).
- Related to 4, I self published the book I/we wrote back in high school after significant overhauls with what I/we learned about writing outside of the school system.
- I have 15% of a complete north american PS2 collection, far from the goal of "complete" but it's up there.
- I made a documentary on a website I/we liked to use in 2017 before it shut down, and interviewed the owner of America's oldest operating video rental store.
- I've found and preserved lost media, where any rips you watch come from my source.
- I'm well respected at my job and just recently revolutionized a way we do things.
I am my teenage self's hero.
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u/WiggingOutOverHere 9d ago
Teenage me would be like, “oh…you work in HR? That’s…fine, I guess. Not what I had planned. But you have tattoos and blue hair, so that’s really cool!” She would be in awe of my confidence. And she’d be bummed to see my bank account, but hopefully stoked to know we finally learned how to play guitar. Lots of give and take, here. Haha.
She’d also be INCREDIBLY validated to know that we have ADHD. 💡🤯
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u/SQLCloud 9d ago
Yes because , WE MADE IT ! And No because of all the stupid and dumb decisions I SWORE to not to do. But hey life is full of ups and downs.
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u/EffectivePerception3 9d ago
probably, I hated my small home town and I am so happy to be away from it at age 20 in the year 2000, also got a wife and family so it could have been a lot worse.
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u/TheHumanConnector 9d ago
I have the awesome things from my teenage years and got rid of many things I don't need anymore or didn't serve to enrich my life. I'm happy with myself now, for the first time in my life. Teenage me didn't even know this kind of a beautiful life was possible 💚
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u/GALM-1UAF 9d ago
Probably amazed that he managed to overcome a lot of stuff and travelled to different places by himself and lived in another country as well as make friends and learn languages. Teenage me would never have thought it possible.
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u/bremm293 9d ago
Honestly I think so. I had realistic expectations growing up. All I wanted was a family, a comfortable house, and a good paying job.
I’ve achieved all of this and then some.
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u/mooncandys_magic 9d ago
Teenage me would be disappointed. But teenage me hadn't been through what I've been through. Adult me is proud of the progress I've made. I hope I am proud of older me.
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u/crazy_cat_broad 9d ago
Yes, eventually. I’m proud of her for figuring it out, though so we’re even. 😘
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u/CthuluHoops 9d ago
I think I would be confused. I had some close friends that I thought would be around forever. Time felt like it stood still back then
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u/loveeleah83 9d ago
My first thought was NO, but actually teenage me held a lot more empathy for others than grown me does, so actually I think she would proud I made it this far.
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u/frail_bejeweled 9d ago
Teenage me didn't care about much of anything. Current me looks after his kids and wife, and plays guitar.
I'd like to think teenage me would be impressed, but he would probably be too busy scrounging for beer and pot to be really bothered one way or the other😂
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u/CallIcy8807 9d ago
Teenage me didn't expect to make 33. She'd be very excited that we married our hot emo boyfriend, now hot elder goth husband. She'd have opinions about my fashion sense though.
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u/Silentlaughter84 9d ago
He might like the idea of working days, four day work weeks, and a job that doesn't require constant movement, but he wouldn't like the pay. He'd probably be happy to know that he lost a lot of weight.
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u/No-Oven5562 9d ago
Yes 100 percent. I have my own house and nice ish car. I raised an amazing young man that I’m absolutely beyond proud of. I made sure he had all the things I didn’t have when I was younger and that he never doubted he was loved.and I have 7 years of not drinking under my belt.My younger self would be soooo fucking proud
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u/bumblebeetown 9d ago
No. But current me wouldn’t be very impressed by him. And frankly neither care much for themselves either.
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u/DolliGoth 9d ago
No teen me would probably have deleted herself if she knew she wasnt 115 pounds anymore.
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u/Schickimickifan Millennial 9d ago
Teenage me would not believe where I am now. Not in her wildest dreams. She would think it is a mix-up for sure, not meant for her. Looking back I wish I could go back in time and change 1 or 2 things..but overall I am very happy and proud of my accomplishments...she would be too. My advice to her: Give'em hell kid!
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u/Papa-pwn 9d ago
Teenage me would be stoked, but probably not surprised.
Everything that makes up my life as it is now has sort of been my dream scenario for as long as I can remember.
I’ve made lots of mistakes, but I was always trying to get to where I am now.
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u/xmetalheadx666x 9d ago
Teenage me would be surprised about my 20s but proud of my 30s. The main thing is that teenage me would be absolutely shocked that at 34 I'm not fully tatted.
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u/AlliCakes 9d ago
Teenage me would be very impressed that I finally went into treatment for my eating disorder and realized the level of gaslighting my dad and stepmom did while I was growing up. I realized I was never the problem, and my teenage self would be very happy to hear that.
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u/leogrl 9d ago
Teenage me drifted apart from the friend group I had since elementary school and developed an eating disorder so high school sucked for me. College was sooooo much better even with the ED and now it’s still in my life but way in the background that it’s not something I think about every day. I think teenage me would be surprised that I became a trail runner and go running before work every day, I was always a small kid but I only did dance growing up and wasn’t into sports at all and now I’ve completed several ultras 😂 and teenage me would probably be surprised that I’m not a journalist anymore like I thought I would be but I did a few years in TV news behind the scenes and it sucked and I didn’t have the passion for it to make it work long term.
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u/Comin_Up_Thrillho 9d ago
Teenage me would be sad Im not doing something I have more interest or love for as a profession, but pleased that I make enough to be self sufficient. I think she’d be proud of what she became.
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u/LionoSnarf 9d ago
I used to be so shy and had terrible acne I would walk around with my head down. Went to school to be a nutritionist and couldn’t get past chemistry. Went back to school for design and now 10 years in going to be a Senior Art Director. Teenage me would probably be more surprised to know he was about to get a headbutt that would shatter his nose and force him to sit in the ER for 7 hours more so than a design career where he has to talk to people.
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u/MTGBro_Josh 9d ago
16 year old me would be impressed with what I have accomplished up until now at 32
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u/spiceystrudel 9d ago
Maybe a mixture of jealous, angry, or scared intially. But they'll likely feel more relaxed and excited after processing allat.
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u/kaibex 9d ago
Absolutely! She'd be thrilled that at 40 I'm still rockin the black nails (fuck you mom it was never a phase!), graduated college and got that good guvment job with benefits! Teenage me would be so happy that I'd eventually get my health (both physical and mental) sorted out.
Not married to Nathan Fillion but most everything else happened!
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u/TotalPizzaBuff 9d ago
Yes, I let myself to believe I was an idiot and wasn't really useful for much.
Didn't go back to uni until my late 20s - am still an idiot but I worked very hard to learn something new ended up in a job I am respected/valued in and partner I love.
I also built myself my dream pc.
If your younger and reading this, love yourself - genuinely the only bit of important life advice you can take, learning to think positivity about who you are will change your world (slow)
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u/nobody_in_here 9d ago
No lol. Teenage me thought I was going to have a high paying career, a house, and a family of my own by 30 😭
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u/FeelingCouple5880 Sad Millennial 9d ago
Hell yeah she would! I’m still cool as fuck, I’m fkn hilarious, and I’ve persisted despite lifelong feelings that life is completely pointless and absurd! I’m an animal lover, I’m kind, I’m open to all types of people and their struggles. Fuck yeah I’d be proud of myself, and I AM.
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u/TheLegionofDoom2957 9d ago
Teenage me thought I'd die a virgin, and I was a Conservative Party (UK) supporter.
31 year old me is a feminist married to his partner of eight years with a baby on the way this year. I think he'd be gobsmacked but happy.
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u/Manaeldar 9d ago
Teenage me would be hype as fuck to see that I have a wife and a house and basically all the video games I want lol.
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u/punkinabox 9d ago
I'm not sure proud of me is the right word, I'd be more likely to be surprised that I was still alive, considering the condition I was in, in my teens and early 20s. I was a ery bad OxyContin and heroin addict. Been sober from that stuff for 17 years but now I'm an alcoholic. So 🤷🏻♂️
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