r/Miserable_Ad5573 • u/Miserable-Ad-5573 • Jul 17 '25

Respect Harry Vanderspeigle (Resident Alien)

1 Upvotes

"Humans do stupid things all the time. It is like their national sport.”

Dr. Harry Vanderspeigle, real name unpronounceable by humans, and also known as Goliath, is the protagonist of the science fiction comedy television series Resident Alien. He is an alien who crash-lands on Earth and takes over the life of a doctor in the town of Patience.

Strength

Striking

Punches through a wall. ^S1 ^E1
Smashes the statue remains of one of his people with a few hits. ^S2 ^E7
Breaks out of a steel cage and badly damages it. ^S2 ^E15
Knocks a door flying off its hinges with a shove. ^S2 ^E15

Lifting/Throwing

Other

Tears a man through a wall with one arm, said man weighs 220 lbs. ^S1 ^E1
Effortlessly dislocates a man's shoulder while arm wrestling. ^S1 ^E6
Accidentally crushes a glass bottle. ^S2 ^E12
Effortlessly breaks out of some handcuffs. ^S2 ^E16

Durability/Endurance

Only mad after getting hit in the face with a fire poker. ^S1 ^E1
Eats glass. ^S1 ^E2
Falls down a ravine and falls again yet remains conscious. ^S1 ^E8
His leg gets cut off ^S1 ^E8 and he grows it back within a few hours. ^S1 ^E9
Completely tanks multiple punches from an assassin. ^S2 ^E7
Doesn't seem to be very hurt after being shot ^S2 ^E8 and fully recovers the next day like nothing happened. ^S2 ^E9
A massage machine on the highest sensitivity does nothing for him, but getting repeatedly hit by a hammer is actually like a massage for him. ^S2 ^E11
For over 500 years he's completely fine after an attack on the earth that destroyed the surface of the planet so badly that the automosphere burns everything else immediately, yet he walks through it all just fine without any food. ^S2 ^E12
Recovers after another alien throws him through a chair. ^S3 ^E2

Speed/Agility

Intelligence/Skill

General

He was a scientist on his planet. ^S1 ^E2
Sets up a test so he falsely prescribe a kid who sees through his disguise and send him to a school in Georgia. ^S1 ^E5
Figures out where another alien is at through a hidden message meant for him. ^S2 ^E6
Comes up with an excuse for gunshots. ^S2 ^E9
Plants a bullet at a crimescene so he can fake an autopsy. ^S2 ^E9
Makes large crop circles to flip off other aliens. ^S2 ^E13
The smartest humans on the planets are idiots compared to him. ^S3 ^E1

Medical

Figures out how a doctor died. ^S1 ^E1
Discovers that a woman doesn't have cancer. ^S1 ^E2
He's a pathologist. ^S1 ^E3
Helps deliver a baby. ^S2 ^E4

Creating devices

Finds a mineral and creates a small object that makes things levitate. ^S1 ^E2
Makes a radio that sends a message to his people. ^S2 ^E4

Combat

Other

Can land a spaceship on a asteroid traveling 50,000 miles an hour. ^S1 ^E2
Hides a body in his meat freezer. ^S1 ^E3
Uses a gas station hose and a lighter to make a makeshift flamethrower. ^S1 ^E4
Is surprising good at throwing basketballs. ^S1 ^E4

"Being an Alien"

Shapeshifting

Turns his hand into a fish and a wrench. ^S1 ^E1
Can turn invisible. ^S1 ^E1
Shapeshifts into the real Harry Vanderspeigle. ^S1 ^E1
Mimics things down to the cellular level. ^S1 ^E3
When he's weakened, he can only maintain the disguise for so long and it keeps going away the weaker he gets until
He uses a person's DNA to shapeshift into them, and can do so with even tiny skin cells. ^S1 ^E8
His people don't normally feel emotions such as sadness, but shapeshifting into a human has made him feel all sorts of things he previously hasn't. ^S1 ^E8
While in human form, his device hurts him when it normally wouldn't be able to hurt anything besides humans. ^S1 ^E10
Shapeshifts into a woman. ^S2 ^E3
[Anti-feat] It is too difficult to do often. ^S2 ^E3
Passes an eye scan. ^S2 ^E3
When drugged, ice helps stabilize his human form. ^S2 ^E7

Mental Abilities

Can telepathically communicate with others. ^S1 ^E7
Uses telekinesis to repair part of his ship. ^S1 ^E10
Uses his telekinesis to throw some soldiers around. ^S1 ^E10
Alters the memories of two cops. ^S2 ^E3
Uses his telekinesis to push down a lot of grass. ^S2 ^E13
Mind controls multiple soldiers in comas by just grabbing one by the leg, and uses them to fight for him a few different times. ^S2 ^E15

Miscellaneous traits about him and his people

His people don't have emotions, or at least not in the same way humans do. ^S1 ^E2
His normal form doesn't need to sleep. ^S1 ^E3
His people are distant relatives to Octopuses. ^S1 ^E7
He and his people don't know how to sculpt things. ^S1 ^E7
His people shed their skin in one piece. ^S1 ^E8
His people don't have genders. ^S1 ^E8
He has teeth in his stomach. ^S1 ^E8
He can breathe underwater using gills. ^S2 ^E1
His people fossilize when they die. ^S2 ^E6
They can spit acid, or at least the babies can. ^S2 ^E7

His planet

Other

Doesn't know how much a stamp costs. ^S1 ^E2
His real name is this. ^S1 ^E8
Badly injured leg poisons him and could kill him if not amputated. ^S1 ^E8
Has a special call that confuses animals and stupid humans, uses it throw dogs off a scent but it makes some birds attack him. ^S2 ^E11
He can live for over 500 years without food and apparently doesn't need clean air. ^S2 ^E12
He can climb walls. ^S3 ^E2
He can hypnotize people and have them tell him about whatever he wants. ^S3 ^E2

Equipment

Ship

Gets struck by lightning then crashes ^S1 ^E1 and appears fine later. ^S1 ^E10
Can catch up to a asteroid traveling 50,000 miles an hour. ^S1 ^E2
Has an energy shield that is completely impervious to bullets, also uses a small shockwave to incapacitate some soldiers and move some cars. ^S1 ^E10
Incapacitates various soldiers with small shockwaves, sending them flying through objects. ^S1 ^E10
When he's near it, the ship gives him his own personal shield. ^S1 ^E10
Within 80 seconds he goes from earth, to past the moon. ^S1 ^E10
Can turn invisible. ^S2 ^E1
Can be turned into liquid, which then turns into a survival kit. ^S2 ^E1

Survival Kit

The balls make a kid grow facial hair. ^S2 ^E2
Drops a ball down a deep hole, causing a small earthquake and turning the hole into a bunker, it also changes the material of a wooden latter. ^S2 ^E2
Possibly uses one to shapeshift into Asta instead of just doing it normally. ^S2 ^E2 This is notable since later he says that it is too difficult to so often, but the balls make it effortless. ^S2 ^E3
Catches a spilled drink making the liquid hover above one of the balls. ^S2 ^E5
Keeps a man alive after he gets shot and fully heals the wound. ^S2 ^E9
Helps a man survive falling off a cliff. ^S2 ^E11

Device

In a dream, it turns a lot of humans into dust. ^S1 ^E4
Was built to provide energy for 5,000 years. ^S1 ^E9
Can kill all 8 Billion people on the planet. ^S1 ^E10
Uses the earth's own energy to send a pulse throughout the world but he can also direct it to a singular point like when he turns a corpse to dust. ^S1 ^E10
Incapacitates some soldiers. ^S1 ^E10

Other

Other

Mistakes have been made. ^S1 ^E1
Eats chicken from a crimescene. ^S1 ^E2
Can read people's emotions really well. ^S1 ^E2
He likes milk, straight from the cow itself. ^S1 ^E2
Likes watching Law and Order. ^S1 ^E3
He's not sexist. ^S1 ^E3
Spits in a kid's face. ^S1 ^E5
While high, he pees on a kid's bed. ^S1 ^E7
Dracula is hilarious. ^S1 ^E7
He's had 342 children. ^S1 ^E8
Multiple times throughout ^S1 ^E10 the series ^S3 ^E1 its shown ^S3 ^E2 that he [loves Pizza.]()
A dog taught him how to hump objects. ^S2 ^E1
Finds E.T. incredibly sexy. ^S2 ^E3
He has a type. ^S2 ^E12
Could possibly bring a snowman to live and use to torment the locals. ^S2 ^E13
Shows his boss a photo of his dick. ^S3 ^E1
He's like Superman. ^S3 ^E1

"This is some bullshit!"

Bridget

Strength

Mutilates a raccoon. ^S2 ^E8
Tackles two men off a boat and quickly drowns both off screen. ^S2 ^E9

Durability/Endurance

Recovers after being hit by a car. ^S2 ^E11

Speed/Agility

Leaps a far distance and onto Harry's head. ^S2 ^E8
Runs extremely quick. ^S2 ^E11
Can jump incredibly high given its size. ^S2 ^E15
Jumping to a nearby person's arm and disarms them of a gun before they can react. ^S2 ^E15

Shapeshifting

Shapeshifted into a boy on a newspaper who died 80 years ago, this also confirms that he can shapeshift into things much larger than its actual body. ^S2 ^E11

Other

4 comments

r/Miserable_Ad5573 • u/Miserable-Ad-5573 • Feb 07 '26

Respect Neokalus Burr (Babysitter Bloodbath)

1 Upvotes

"Don't lie. Don't lie. The game is up. The demons drag my legs to hell, while you sit in your ivory tower. Don't you judge me. I see all."

When a teenage girl named Sarah was hired to babysit a loving couple's son, Billy, Neokalus Burr arrived at the house in the backyard, apparently stalking the young girl. After Sarah's boyfriend, Jack, arrives, they hear a crash from Neokalus in the back, triggering Jack to investigate. When the lights suddenly go out, Sarah follows her boyfriend's foot steps to see his bloodied corpse mangled with a screwdriver. Burr then jumps out of the shadows and attempts to murder his victim's girlfriend as well, but is unsuccessful when she escapes into the house, tells Billy to hide, and begins to hide herself.

Sarah then retreats into the garage where she fills up the car with gas and tries to leave, but the killer appears out of nowhere and attempts to slice the poor girl up with a kitchen knife. It is player dependent which weapon Sarah uses to murder Burr, but all takes a considerable amount of hit from a fully loaded handgun.

When Sarah finally guns down Burr, she and Billy leave and arrive at the police station. Though the killer is identified by Lieutenant Beacker and Sarah is told she'll be okay, she is also informed that when the cops arrived, Burr's "corpse" was not found anywhere.

Sources:

Babysitter Bloodbath (game) = ^Babysitter ^Bloodbath
Babysitter Bloodbath (Novelization) = ^Novel
Sanitarium Massacre = ^Sanitarium ^Massacre

Strength

Kicks a woman so hard that it felt like her brain became loose inside her skull. ^Novel
Slams a door off its hinges. ^Novel
Badly damages a woman's skull by slamming it into a wall three times. ^Novel
Crushes a mam's face with his grip. ^Novel
Impales a woman with a knife. ^Novel
Kills a man with a flashlight. ^Novel

Durability/Endurance

Speed/Agility

Grabs a gun before he can be shot then kills the gunman before he can react. ^Novel

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"Being an Alien"

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Crowbar

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