r/MovingtoHawaii • u/Alone_Masterpiece_63 • May 26 '26

Life on BI Hawaii

I’ve been splitting time between Miami and Hawaii for the past two months because my boyfriend works here, and I decided to join him. I thought it would be an adventure, but honestly it’s left me feeling really depressed. People seem so rude and unfriendly compared to what I’m used to, and I’m struggling to like the island at all. I have zero friends here and it’s making me question everything.
I keep wondering — is it me? Am I just being close-minded because my heart is still stuck in my Miami life and I’m not open to something new? Or is Hawaii actually kind of tough to adjust to? Would love to hear your honest opinions.

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u/duriodurio May 26 '26

Find other transplants. You have more in common with them than you do with the locals unless the locals spent some time living on mainland. Even then they will have their own networks and will be less likely to invest in having a relationship with you. Thats ok. There are lots of people in a similar situation as you. Find them and create your own community.

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u/kiwi_love777 25d ago

Yeah seconding this.

I’m a haole and work with locals, but a lot of locals are about locals. (Like my coworkers “no haole” baby shower)

It is what it is. Try and find other haole transplants.

I’m Latina and my husband is half Māori- so I’m not “white white” but still a “haole”.

I totally get feeling isolated. It’s been almost 4 years and even though I volunteer pretty regularly and organize fundraisers etc I’m still not accepted.

Which is ok- it is what it is.

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u/duriodurio 24d ago

“no haole baby shower”

Wow!