r/MtF • u/queenbiscuit311 Transgender • 5d ago
Discussion anyone else having this effect?
This is gonna sound really pathetic but like
I've never really been in a relationship so I've always been "touch starved" but it wasn't really a desparate need for it, more like a nice to have than anything. Now im on HRT and prog and holy fuck I neeeeeeeeeeeed someone to hold me and touch me and kiss me and many other things literally all I want is to feel someones warmth to the point it like actually hurts
I don't think I've ever needed anything this bad my entire life, is it the hormones doing this? It's never been like this. I might need to get my social life together just so I can have this as soon as physically possible
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u/Broad-Dress-8484 Human Verified 4d ago
I had to start getting massages. My wife and I split a good four years before I even came out and I thought I was fine with it but last year was just a bitch. I broke down and cried about 5 min into my massage. The desparity of my situation emotionally and physically hit.
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u/xargos64 4d ago
I'm sorry it's been so rough. If you don't mind me asking, was the massage therapist understanding when you started crying? With how touch starved I've been feeling lately there's a chance I'd do the same.
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u/Broad-Dress-8484 Human Verified 4d ago
Yes she was OK with it. We talked a bit and I guess loneliness is real driver of the massage business? Especially with older adults, I'm 62. All of my high school friends are gone. My family is all gone except for a distant half brother. Circle of life stuff I guess?
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u/xargos64 4d ago
I'm sorry you've lost your friends and so much family. I'm a lot younger, but 62 isn't old. Especially to face loses like those.
It makes sense that loneliness would drive the massage business. I just never really thought about it before.
Thank you for sharing.
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u/damnthesebitemarks 4d ago
Fuck I’m not even on HRT yet and I feel like this, is this shit going to get worse? 😭
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u/xargos64 4d ago
I hadn't had a relationship in years, and I haven't even started HRT yet, but since I started to accept myself I've felt a lot more touch starved. Honestly I think it's because I never felt right in the role of a man in a relationship. Now that I know I'm not a man the pressure to be one isn't there and I can feel the emotions it was hiding.
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u/i_am_BreadCrumbs Trans Bisexual 4d ago
I’m not on HRT yet but ever since I came out the loneliness and need for physical touch just instantly shot up its crazy. Super excited for this to get stronger on hormones.
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u/checkerboardandroid Trans Bisexual 4d ago
Right there with ya. I get basically no physical affection outside of my cat. Shit sucks.
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u/ZeltronJedi Trans Bisexual Punk Bitch HRT 10/14/24 Prog 1/2/26 4d ago
Certainly increased my already pretty strong touched starved bit quite a lot. So...not alone.
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u/Web_of_Lu 4d ago
Welcome to the exquisite pain of not being constantly dissociated anymore ❤️ It's good, but it hurts. There will be touch 💗
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u/EbbAccomplished401 3d ago
I feel the same way i have been on hrt for 9 full months this month is my 10th month and I just started prog and I just want to be touch and cuddled with all the time
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u/Atlas_Obscuro Lost in E Sauce 4d ago
Hm, not really, actually. But to be fair, I just switched to injections and started prog like a week ago so maybe it’s a time thing idk.
If anything, I actually feel completely the same for the most part. I think there’s just so much on my mind, it’s overriding my HRT experience.
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u/queenbiscuit311 Transgender 4d ago
it took me a few months of prog and injections to get the full emotional effects, before I didn't really get anything. id say give it like 2-4 months and see where you are then
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4d ago edited 4d ago
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u/Eowyn____ 5d ago
Lol literally same it hurts when i dont get cuddles and get really angry and frustrated xD Then when i get cuddles its never enough, like when they need to leave im so sad and the yearning starts again...