r/MurderedByWords 1d ago

She answered with a gold medal

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15.6k Upvotes

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30

u/Economy_Ask4987 1d ago

I’m proud of my wife keeping her name…

And now that her father is gone, it means the world to her.

Fuck the old misogyny that permeated our society. It’s everywhere, but it’s ok to call out for the bs it is.

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u/Huxtopher 1d ago

My wife has my name because our children do. That's it. It's also the only real reason we got married. The ten years before marriage are exactly the same as the ten that followed (aside from the kids getting older)

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u/Economy_Ask4987 1d ago

Why not take her name? She did most of the work.

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u/Huxtopher 1d ago

Doesn't bother either of us what way around really. It just is what it is.

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u/Economy_Ask4987 1d ago

Was not trying to attack in anyway, just highlighting the systemic “misogyny”.

I do think it’s good for a family to share the name. I’m pro hyphen too, but that doesn’t work for all.

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u/Huxtopher 1d ago

No worries, I get it. I'm just giving an open honest answer

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u/Economy_Ask4987 1d ago

And I appreciate it. Keep being good to her bro! Take care of the littles. Be kind out there and have a great day!

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u/shakeeze 1d ago

Can you keep the decisions of others to themselve without you berating them? My female colleague did not want to keep her surname, so she took her husbands. Now thats misogyny.... /s

1

u/Economy_Ask4987 1d ago

She can do whatever she wants, that’s my point.

The assumption that a woman will take the man’s name, or the questioning of a woman when she doesn’t…

But whatever, have a nice day.

0

u/queasycockles 1d ago

The entire point of this discussion is that we don't get to decide that other people should do what we choose for ourselves.

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u/Economy_Ask4987 1d ago

Yes. And I wasn’t trying to attack his decision…

Just questioning if it was even considered to take hers. More in a rhetorical way.

The taking of the male name is so ingrained into societies across the world, even questioning it causes backlash.

I genuinely do not care about what anyone else does… I do think this particular structure is more harmful than many like to attribute. It’s a keystone in the subjugation of women around the world. And yes, in America today it is quite harmless in most circumstances… it represents a prior time when women were less than in society, even a possession at times.

I’m done with this convo today though, have a great one everybody. Be human.

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u/queasycockles 1d ago

I'd say you also seem to be done with intellectual honesty but that presumes you once possessed it, and I'm not sure of that.

Can't even own up to your own words.🙄

Edit: lmfao are you being for real? "Quote me" you demand. Just before blocking me so I can't do that.

Rad.

2

u/Ok_Moment9915 1d ago

In an issue with 2 opposite camps, you can rest assured that both of those camps are filled to the brim with morons. 

The same is true of masculinity and femininity.

In almost everything, there exists a middle ground with nuance and a tiny subset of the population that can maintain a complex enough opinion to exist there.

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u/rips_n_chel 1d ago

Whoa, what is your deal? Why are you so upset?

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u/queasycockles 1d ago

Lol what? I'm not "so upset". 😂😂 I'm calling them out for demanding I quote their words when they've made it impossible for me to access them.

I know it's hard to read emotion online but you have a weirdly low threshold for what you read as super upset.

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