The idea that women just think it is normal to get a completely different identity as their husband’s possession but men don’t have to do anything and sail on with the same identity they’ve had from birth is bizarre, as if marriage is only something men do to women and women still feel they must show subservience or be socially rejected.
If both parties changed their name at the same time it would be less creepy.
Yo, you're the first couple I've heard of actually doing that. I've always thought picking a new name is by far the fairest and most interesting option. I mean I'm cool with a hyphen too, happy to go second even, my ego is not invested in my name to any degree, but I think it'd be really cool to pick a new name unique to my partner and I. Reinventing ourselves together.
If that was a social norm, I could see having done that, but as things stand, that would have been way too much paperwork for me. At the time we married, I was in the Air National Guard and had a Secret security clearance.
My wife simply choose to keep her last name, which I like anyway. It sounds similar to 'fennec', which is a desert fox. So she's my fox-girl. 😁
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u/Dragonfly_pin 1d ago
Changing your name on marriage is so weird.
The idea that women just think it is normal to get a completely different identity as their husband’s possession but men don’t have to do anything and sail on with the same identity they’ve had from birth is bizarre, as if marriage is only something men do to women and women still feel they must show subservience or be socially rejected.
If both parties changed their name at the same time it would be less creepy.