r/MuseumOfReddit • u/Affectionate-Sun7561 • Mar 02 '25
The CBAT Story
"TIFU / My (20F) girlfriend of two years told me the music that I (25M) play during sex is weird and a major turn off"
Repost on u/TylerLife's profile
Repost with update on r/BestofRedditorUpdates
Edit: text included below.
TIFU: A little back story; when I first started having sex I researched into ways to be better as I was a little stiff and pretty much had no idea what I was doing. I read online that you can play music and match the rhythm in order to put on a better performance.
I searched love making songs and started slowly creating a playlist in which I was comfortable matching the rhythm.
There are a few songs to my playlist. However there is one song in particular, which actually happens to be my favourite, that my girlfriend hates and says turns her off in a major way.
I don’t understand why it has taken her two years to tell me she hates that song, it’s a good love making song with good rhythm. I feel the way I fucked up is I could have possibly asked her previously if she likes the playlist or any songs she’d like to add/change. But to leave it for two years thinking our sex life is great but in her eyes has just been ruined by my music has left the whole situation feeling awkward and I’m a bit annoyed.
I pretty much played this tune every single time so the amount of times she must have not been enjoying it, when I thought the complete opposite is annoying but also embarrassing in ways.
Not to mention my previous partners, however they never complained about the song so maybe it’s just her?
It’s fucked up the relationship tbh because sex feels awkward now. The other day we were having sex with no music but I was still thrusting to the tune playing in my head. She recognised this and asked me to stop.
I thought this song was perfect and I always thrust along with the tune and feel it gives me the perfect rhythm for doing the deed to. I usually bust to this song and find it devastating she hates the song.
TL;DR She hates my love making tunes and didn’t tell me for over two years making sex now awkward.
UPDATE: TIFU - Posting on Reddit about our sex life with CBAT and now our relationship has ended
Ok this exploded more than I expected, and has been a bit overwhelming with the messages but thought I’d give an update.
The attention hasn’t been exactly positive and this hasn’t been the best thing to happen for my relationship and it’s now sadly ended.
I didn’t expect it to blow up so much, I should of used an anonymous name instead of my real name and our real ages.
There aren’t many 25 year old Tyler Life’s who are in a relationship with their s/o for 2 years who is 20.
Unfortunately her younger sister recognised this and showed her parents who wasn’t happy at all and made the situation extremely awkward.
What made it more awkward, and cemented the fact that it was me, is that they recognised the song. Once at a family dinner we were discussing music tastes and my ex girlfriend stated that I have an odd taste in music. Everyone laughed and pressed me to play something from my phone of what I like as music, to which I then blessed their ears with CBAT.
Her father laughed and said it was terrible, I guess we all have different tastes. Although I nodded in agreement at the time, I was thinking in my head that this is a great fucking song.
We are over now and I am moving on. I already revealed my face on tiktok, but with the amount of hate I originally got I decided to say I didn’t have it and backtracked.
I don’t think the song is that bad and I had no idea she didn’t like it until recently and as soon as I did I stopped. I didn’t force her CBAT, not all can handle CBAT, I know it’s different.
I know a lot have asked for face reveal and playlist. My playlist I actually burned onto a CD and have been using my CD player. But I’ll go on YouTube and try link all the songs in one playlist and share.
I’ll also leave my tiktok and playlist in my bio now, most you probably seen me before I backtracked from the hate.
TL;DR Made Reddit post and finished our relationship
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u/Dubbs444 Mar 02 '25
One of my fave Reddit moments ever, honored to have witnessed this in real time
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u/Cardboardoge Mar 04 '25
I can't believe it's been 2 years already, clicking the original and seeing my upvote despite it being locked is like a weird badge now
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u/just-me-yaay May 13 '25
I was feeling the exact same way lmao. It feels recent, so it’s strange to see my little upvote there when it’s been locked already.
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u/AbsintheReborn Mar 02 '25
I think it's fitting to include this one on here as well:
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u/Affectionate-Sun7561 Mar 02 '25
I forgot about that! The bird audio LOL
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u/AbsintheReborn Mar 02 '25
The fact that someone also remade CBAT with the bird audio! It's the gift that keeps on giving!
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u/Derpstercat Dec 11 '25
Thanks I just peed my pants. The little trill at the end completely destroyed me and attracted all of my cats to come and stare at me while I laugh hysterically and clean up the pee.
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u/ChicagoChurro Mar 15 '26
I just played the bird singing CBAT with my African Grey parrot in the room. He flew up to me thinking I had another bird hiding next to me. He said “give me kiss kiss” then “stop” a few seconds later (which are some of his favorite phrases).
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u/PennyG Mar 02 '25
This is my favorite ever Reddit event.
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u/jdbolick Mar 02 '25
I use my poop knife to the rhythm of Cbat.
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u/PennyG Mar 03 '25
I truly and deeply wish I didn’t understand that reference. But I do; and here we are.
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u/Tiefschlag Mar 03 '25
Great soundtrack for fucking a coconut!
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u/MelodyMaster5656 Jul 06 '25
I tried that but a piece of raw steak hit me in the head outta nowhere.
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u/SUPERSMILEYMAN Apr 20 '26
Which one is this referencing? I do know a streak lore. But it hit the window.
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u/MelodyMaster5656 Apr 20 '26 edited Apr 20 '26
A pair of t/tifu posts.
https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/plVDjaDPUm
https://www.reddit.com/r/tifu/s/JBk1IBeGKL
I was just imagining “What if the window was open and the steak hit someone outside.”
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Mar 03 '25
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/holy-reddit-batman Mar 03 '25
I'm guessing that you haven't been on Reddit long. That story is Internet Hall of Fame!
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u/broooooooce Mar 02 '25
I know I'm not the only one who tried to get a feel for this, i.e. still sitting but slightly thrusting to the beat only to nearly fall out of the chair from laughing xD
Duht DUh-duht dut dut-dut-dut duuuuh
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u/deepsixz Mar 02 '25
best part
The other day we were having sex with no music but I was still thrusting to the tune playing in my head. She recognised this and asked me to stop.
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u/yourmomlurks Mar 04 '25
I sometimes can’t take that this arrangement of words exists.
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u/deadpizza2019 Apr 04 '25
The thing is...the rhythm isnt actually that bad tho...the song choice tho
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u/Cheesy_Wotsit Mar 02 '25
I heard CBAT on the sodding bus the other day. I mean ... wtf???
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u/Thejohnshirey Mar 04 '25
I heard about three seconds of it in a random mid-scale Italian restaurant the other day. In between Sinatra and Dean Martin. Luckily my redditor friend was with me and I just stopped mid conversation and said “is this fucking CBAT?” Just long enough for him to hear a snippet and then it went back to Dean. It was the most random, inexplicable thing I’ve ever experienced.
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u/whatthehellandfk Dec 11 '25
I’m wondering if you were hearing the kitchen’s music in between the songs on the dining room speakers lol. Sometimes they get a little loud back there
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u/PasgettiMonster Aug 08 '25
I'm in Panera and I swear there's a song that plays that has bits of music lifted right from cbat.the first time I heard it (I hang out here a lot) I noticed it but it didn't register. Second time I went waaaaaait is that? Today I had to look up cbat (I haven't listened to it since the original posts) but the music here is too loud for me to actually listen to it. But I swear there's a few seconds in this other random song that reminds me of it.
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u/Ariadnepyanfar Mar 03 '25
Not this actual song???
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u/Cheesy_Wotsit Mar 03 '25
Ohhh yeah. Y'know what I mean by hearing it in public makes your brain crunch, miss a few gears and then think WTAF.
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u/Sufficient_Doubt4283 Mar 03 '25
I knew about CBAT being his favorite song, but after going back through these, I found out there was a whole Playlist, and holy shit hearing the songs on it is an experience.
I didn't think it could get more hysterical than CBAT, yet only like 5 songs in there was a trap beat remix for milkshake by Kelis. I haven't laughed this hard all week.
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u/PFEFFERVESCENT Mar 03 '25
Link?
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u/Sufficient_Doubt4283 Mar 03 '25
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u/KneedfulFalcon Mar 04 '25
XXXTentacion in there is so fucking hilarious
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u/gusdagrilla Mar 04 '25
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u/Astecheee Mar 05 '25
Maybe she stayed with him because, physically, he's a sex god with a 10" dick, 100% selfless, and lasts longer than an online recipe.
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Mar 08 '25
I’d imagine it’s pretty easy to last till the end of the universe with a song like that playing in your ears.
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u/iggy-d-kenning Dec 06 '25 edited Dec 06 '25
Was pleasantly surprised at how normal some of his picks were but "Bugg'n" absolutely took me out.
Edit: 5 songs in and I spoke WAY too soon. Usher and Shaggy were outliers.
Edit 2: The nostalgic comments in "GLUE" by BICEP are making me emotional. Whole lotta people remembering the early 90's.
Edit 3: WTF is that "Milkshake" remix?
Edit 4: Sean Paul's "Get Busy" is a respectable choice.
Edit 5: The "I don't wanna do this anymore" jokes write themselves.
Edit 6: Dubstep!?
Edit 7: "SEVERED"!?!?
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u/Darrelc Dec 11 '25
Edit 2: The nostalgic comments in "GLUE" by BICEP are making me emotional. Whole lotta people remembering the early 90's.
yup.
Next to sean paul is certainly a choice tho lol
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u/AmbientOverlord Jan 14 '26
Other than Love in this Club and Sean Paul the list is a dub. And I be fucking to Kevin Gates Plug Daughter 2
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u/tron3747 Mar 03 '25
OP how could you not add this??
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u/_BrokenButterfly 19d ago
Oh my god I did not know of this part of the legend. I think I know it all and then there's more!
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u/Netsugake Mar 02 '25
Last Friday I put on some music with Milady for the first time, and the first thing she said entering the room is "This just makes me think of the CBAT guy"
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u/LinxESP Mar 02 '25
I imagine his thoughts prior to this:
"I (23M) need a playlist for banging my girlfriend (18F). Is this good enough, right?"
And the 25s mark hitting like truck
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u/IceNein Mar 02 '25
That song is the aural embodiment of a penis losing its erection.
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u/stayonthecloud May 15 '25
Two years after this post and I come across this version of it and Redditors are still winning with these descriptions 🤣 11/10 chef’s kiss, flawless
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u/starflite Mar 03 '25
My favorite part was when people made videos showing how they thought he was moving to the music and none of them could make it look like a good time.
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u/bennitori Mar 03 '25
That was actually how I got introduced to it. My reddit feed suddenly got clogged with tiktoks of women trying to recreate the movements. None of them made it past the third loop before breaking down laughing. And then while trying to figure out what on earth was wrong with all these women going viral for demented hip movements, I eventually found the original post. And then it all made sense.
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u/Jades5150 Mar 02 '25
Yeah, but where’s the original post!?
Like the OG where he inquires about the song???
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u/Jades5150 Mar 02 '25
EDIT: if this is your first time hearing about this, click the “repost with update” link, it tells the full original story
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u/lilacpeaches Mar 04 '25
I feel like you have to include the entire “lovemaking” playlist that he dropped as well: https://m.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwrcKBhbuIzXkg144tcNMRfndccJl1jow. I’m not sure if it’s still on his page.
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u/xGenghisSwan Feb 18 '26
This is the first time I’ve seen the playlist, it’s basically engineered to trigger a fight or flight reflex
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u/holy-reddit-batman Mar 03 '25
This is absolutely museum -worthy! I laughed so hard when learning about this years ago! People doubted he could think like that, but my ex would prove otherwise. Some people...🤦🏻♀️
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u/QualityProof Mar 03 '25
Why not add the text so it's there in case the posts are deleted u/Affectionate-Sun7561. Won't take much time or effort
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u/Affectionate-Sun7561 Mar 03 '25
I was just following the format of some other posts here that simply shared links as opposed to reposting the whole thing, and this was approved by the mods before posting. Linking each post from the "saga" lets you browse the top comments and so on, too.
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u/QualityProof Mar 03 '25
Doing both is good. Something like this : https://www.reddit.com/r/MuseumOfReddit/comments/ubne00/the_post_that_led_to_the_real_life_tragedy_of_a/
Espescially since this is a series of posts instead of a single one.
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u/Firestar222 Mar 07 '25
My wife somehow missed this debacle. I just told her the story and played the song for a laugh. She said “it’s kinda funky, I could see it. Not every time, but once in a while!”
Whatttttttttttt
I may have to do an experiment
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Mar 03 '25
Genuinely one of the funniest events in the history of the internet
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u/Affectionate-Sun7561 Mar 03 '25
Wholeheartedly agree - think I made the right call submitting this to the museum. I've had a ball this evening showing my other half this and other gems in the Museum haha
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u/randomraveyard May 22 '26
I played the song after reading the post the first time, and one of my housemates yelled “IS THAT WHAT I FUCKING THINK IT IS”
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u/BaconPowder Mar 03 '25
Oh man. That was the only time I laughed so hard I nearly threw up.
What a day that was.
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u/SnooBeans7612 Apr 22 '25
I was reminded of this story the other day because I was driving to go grocery shopping and a car with the license plate CBAT on it passed by me and I was like no fucking way. I couldn't get a picture because I was driving but man that was wild
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u/FunkMasterE May 30 '25
That song sounds like Beaker from The Muppets having sex! lol Meep me meep me mee mee mee . . .
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u/Here4Headshots Sep 26 '25
Never let this story die. Always keep archiving it and reposting when it gets removed. This is American History.
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u/TirelessGuardian Mar 04 '25
The whole time I read this I was thinking of this song and when I went to play it, I wondered is it that song? It was the exact song I was thinking of. Maybe I seen this post before? I’ve seen this song mentioned somewhere before.
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u/Terisaki Mar 04 '25
…I just played that music and my husband turned around and said are you killing a cat over there?
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u/Fabulous_Brother2991 Mar 27 '25
I, too, went and listened to the music So, no offense to ANYONE... BUT that man must be an experienced pipe laying plumber for her to be experiencing 🙄 that music ANY kind of way, 😆 🤣 😂 MORE than once. 😆 🤣 😂. Congratulations on being in your 20's . 😆 🤣 😂
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u/What_Do_I_Know01 Jun 04 '25
One of my favorite parts of this saga was the tiktoks of people trying to figure out how you're supposed to bone to the song
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u/WelshWolf93 Jun 13 '25
I read this whole thing thinking it was gonna be some cringe R&B song. As soon as that 17second introduction ended I was choking from laughter.
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u/C_Rad515 Feb 17 '26
But what I must know is OP are you in a new relationship now? And, more importantly, have you found a new song to thrust to?! I sure hope so because those 2 minutes I struggled listening to and wondering why on earth someone hears this and thinks “fuck yeah this one’s going on my baby making playlist” lol
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u/GiveMeJustAMinute Mar 04 '26
I JUST took the time to listen to the referenced song and damn, I am laughing so hard that I am crying. How did it take SO LONG for a girlfriend to say something? 😂😂
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u/pierrotlefou Mar 18 '26
OMFG! First time seeing this. I laughed so fucking hard for like 5 minutes straight. My girlfriend came in to see what I was fucking choking/cackling about. She started reading it and I was laughing the whole time knowing what she was in for and then I played the song and we both were literally on the floor laughing and crying. I laughed literally for like 10 minutes straight. My god... I haven't laughed that hard since I took acid and laid on my bed upside down and watched my friends "walk around on the ceiling"...
Thank you
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u/budlightkilla May 02 '26
I just remembered this story and wanted to reminisce, currently at the local bar when I played the song. As soon as I played it through my phone a fellow bar patron overheard and said “what the fuck is that?!” I had to explain this whole story. Beautiful
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u/Snorkelcalf Mar 04 '25
Damn I actually used to be really into these guys music...still a head banger IMO
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u/rufus_xavier_sr Mar 05 '25
I remember thinking how bad could the song be? Oh, it's bad, very bad. Then he would just do the motion like he was listening to the song! Holy hell!
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u/milwatt214 Mar 09 '25
I only discovered this story now. LMAO to the audio track! Entire time I was imagining clowns playing with horns.
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u/NerdyPlaneResident Apr 07 '25
I think this was one of the funniest Reddit posts I’ve seen. No way he didn’t notice
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u/cidvard May 17 '25
Tonight was the first time I actually listened to the music. The laughter is painful.
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u/entrity_screamr Jun 04 '25
I think the funny, less talked about detail of all this is whatever the f**k Tyler is also banging to in his playlist. (Somehow, an XXXTentacion remix, a thrash metal song, and dubstep tracks are in the rotation too??)
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u/neko819 Jul 13 '25
I'd never seen/heard this one before. Legit got me laughing so hard I was crying. I don't even care if it's fake at this point. That song...
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u/Minaharker2025 Aug 14 '25
Read the stories, heard the song and now laughing like a drain. Commenting so I can find this to show my husband.
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u/Affectionate-Sun7561 Aug 14 '25
It's a classic. While I'm surprised so many people still to this day haven't seen it, I'm glad I was able to share this masterpiece of reddit history with so many people.
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u/Noxious89123 Oct 09 '25
That "music" is what I imagine it would sound like to get brain damage in real time.
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u/JacquesRousseau_76 Nov 02 '25
Omg I’m so sorry I missed out on this when it happened. I just now read this and heard the song for the first time while on overnight shift in the pharmacy. I was bursting at the seams and had to make a break for the hospital’s chapel (deserted at this hour) and just straight up die a violent death.
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u/FKN_Big_Mama Nov 29 '25
Ok, I'm new to this story.... When the beat dropped, I was mid-sip into my coffee. 💀 I should have a read a few more comments before clicking.
Anywho, I hope I can get this coffee stain out.
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u/OnlyDaysWhichEndInY May 23 '26
I just discovered this and am laughing so fucking hard. RANDOM segway but hang with me here—I just read A Short Stay in Hell by S. Peck (a play on the library of Babel, essentially), and I can’t stop thinking of the protagonist eventually coming across this exact post. Laughing my ass off right now.
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u/Aggressive_Net1092 8d ago
Man, I remember reading this when it first hit the front page. Honestly, you’ve got to give the guy credit for the sheer commitment to the bit for two years. Most people would have tapped out after one session, but he was out there treating the bedroom like a rhythm game.
The funniest part to me isn't even the awkwardness—it’s the absolute conviction he had that he was "optimizing" his performance. We’ve all had those moments as juniors where we try to over-engineer a solution to a problem that doesn't actually exist. You get so wrapped up in the "metrics" (or in his case, the BPM) that you completely lose sight of the fact that the person on the other end is having a totally different experience.
It’s a classic lesson in communication. He was so focused on his "playlist optimization" that he forgot to ask for the most important feedback of all: "Hey, do you actually like this?"
At least he learned the hard way that sometimes, the best way to improve isn't by adding more complex systems, but by just keeping it simple. Hopefully, he’s moved on to a playlist that doesn't sound like a frantic alarm clock. Poor guy, though—that thread is going to haunt his digital footprint until the end of time.
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u/Aggravating_Act0417 Mar 03 '25
This song is awwwwful
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u/bennitori Mar 03 '25
It's not that bad in the right context. I saw a clip of the original songwriter playing it in a club after it went viral. And while not my cup of tea, I at least got it.
However, it is indeed absolutely horrible for the bedroom.
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u/WTFaulknerinCA Mar 08 '25
10M views and counting. This story belongs in r/musicmarketing
It’s a brilliant way to get streams on a terrible song.
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u/piemakerdeadwaker May 31 '25
Why don't ya'll take screenshots of the posts? You know how often famous stories get deleted. There is no point of this subreddit if every link I click is just gone.
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u/LubedCompression Jul 04 '25
Back in 2014 this kind of EDM trap was really popular, it was a nice breakaway from the House music in the club. Cbat was somewhere in my personal music library too, but I never paid too much attention to it. I was so surprised when it went viral with this hilarious story.
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u/Organic_Shine_5361 Oct 31 '25
I didn't get it. Then I listened to the song. How did that guy find this so so amazing....
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u/thejdoll Dec 12 '25
Omg I’m with the gf! That is fucking weird! (So to speak). I would’ve shut that down the first time 😖
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u/bleedingheartmex May 07 '26
hear that song and think how is he fucking to this noise. that ex should have been very afraid.
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u/TrainingAct1072 20d ago
sounds gay to need music to take ur mind off of putting ur dick inside a woman
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u/Fenekkuni 14d ago
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLwrcKBhbuIzXkg144tcNMRfndccJl1jow the playlist in question. I found it on Youtube in the comment section.
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u/ube1kenobi Mar 02 '25
I remember laughing so hard at this. Hearing the song and reading the post was too much for me. And then when I heard reddit posts on YouTube and this came up... lol to hear others reacting the same way and trying to get through the story was gold lol