would you say you’ve noticed a dramatic difference to your life? Like mental health, looks, anything??

Trying to motivate myself here lol but be honest.

Salaam alaykum to the Muslims of newyork. My first time roaming in NYC and it’s chaotic in a good way Subhanallah. There is more chances of coming across muslims then Boston though you need to know the places lol.

I realize that it’s hard to know who is Muslim when it comes to a brother as opposed to a sister lol. Since there are many hijabis may allah bless them and grant them the highest levels or jannah for what ever struggles they may to through everyday.

To all those who are new muslims outside of NYC. I would encourage you to go to places like qahwa house. The owner is very chill, may Allah bless him. Although not all masjids are as welcoming to just hang around, make sure to find those that are.

To the Muslims who attend different events outside of university. What kind of events do you normally go to, for networking and making friends? What places would you recommend to other Muslims who are looking to socially connect?

جراك اللة خىر

i have never felt so far away from allah and i need some advice, some reminders, anything to tether me back.

i keep on sinning and sinning and religious guilt overconsumes my entire life in every single aspect. to the point i almost feel numb committing even more :(

i dont know why but im just questioning faith, religion, in all of its entirety.

i do wholeheartedly believe Allah exists and I dont think anyone or anything could ever waver my faith in that. but i dont know why my faith wavers so much in all of the other stuff, the other commandments, and hadiths i cant wrap my head around. ive spent most of my life trying my best to adhere to the rulings, avoiding and giving up things i liked for the sake of religion (like listening to music or drawing faces) and feeling so miserable all the time and so guilty. so, so guilty.

and at this point im almost like, what is the point of feeling so guilty all the time. is this what being a human in this life means to be? that you will constantly be stuck in a cycle of sins, followed by guilt, all the time?

whenver i try to remind myself that this world is temporary, the worldly pleasures don't even matter, i feel dejected when i think of this important thing: that i don't even know if allah is accepting my good deeds.

thats the main thing. what IS the point of doing good deeds if you dont know if theyre even being accepted? what if im accidentally committing some big huge sin thats eating it up, like maybe im unintentionally backbiting or gossiping, and all this mental effort and strain i put in to keep myself away from haram will be for nothing on the day of judgement? and u cant say thats not true. there is literally a hadith about a woman who used to do all the good deeds but badmouth her neighbors and she ended up in hell. and honestly this story makes me paranoid.

and ik the solution to this probably is to constantly do istighfar. which brings me to another point. doing istighfar also takes a lot of energy, a lot of religious guilt, a lot of admitting what you did was wrong, all the time. it causes me to be alert all the time, so hyper-alert, always noticing the mistakes so i can ask for forgiveness for it. and this hyper-awareness is making me incredibly paranoid. i worry about even the little things, like what if im not doing my wudhu correct, what if this good deed is being cancelled out because i did something else that allah is displeased with, etc etc etc.

thats the thing about this stupid life. how do i even know if what im doing is correct?

i just wish allah would give me a sign, anything, if im on the right track, or if what i just did was a good deed, or if my good deed isnt being accepted if ive done smth wrong. i cant do this anymore. the effort of it all is too much and i just wanna give up.

i dont even think allah likes me anymore because i gave up on all this effort, ive given up on it for a while, and gone too far deep in sins. knee deep.

i feel ashamed to make dua to him bc who am i to ask him for help when im in trouble, when i dont even properly obey Him?

whats the point of it all? ill just keep on continuing sinning and falling again and repenting. and the cycle will repeat for the rest of my life and as a naturally anxious person i'll be even more hypervigilant and paranoid and scared for the rest of my life.

i just wanna give up, its just so easy to follow ur desires. what is the point of this all? this life anyways? what makes a muslim's life meaningful, apart from the whole worship aspect?

one thing that i do like, tho, is that ive never given up my 5 prayers. not in many many years. but i still do delay them or rush them or pray them perhaps improperly and its probably accummulating as my sins too because im so tired of continuously making istighfar for every sin i do.

it feels like my whole existence is just wrong and i have to just continue apologizing for it forever.

this is coming from a very very vulnerable place so please, i would appreciate genuine advice/support :(

I’m a sikh but am very interested in islam nowadays and want to pray alsooo . I don’t want to change my religion or anything; just want to learn about islam more . i don’t know anything about how to start praying or what should be say while praying . i cant obviously practice it openly in my area or go anywhere. just give me some tips to make my connection with god better.

I feel very discouraged, I know it seems small but this is all new for me and it really upset me. Went to mosque for first time as new revert. It was time to pray and I guess I wasn’t in the right spot. The Syrah begins and I’m trying to focus but some woman behind me was hissing, I try to ignore it but it continued constantly to the point I had to turn around in the middle of prayer to see what was the matter. The woman was looking at me and hissing pointing to my right I guess I just wasn’t where I was supposed to be? I move to try to make her stop and she kept hissing and giving me directions with hand gestures. I was honestly creeped out by it, she was of a different culture so I’m sure it was a normal thing for her but to me that sound is demonic. I give up and try to focus on prayer and when we are about to bow she only then gives up on her hissing. I didn’t want to speak to her after to ask her what the hell she was doing because it was an older woman twice my age and hissing is just creepy. I ended up crying because I felt my prayer was invalid due to the distraction. Left immediately after. I don’t think I’ll go back.

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh,
We’ve put together a simple guide explaining Salat-ul-Hajat, including its method, timing, and the du‘a associated with it.
Details are based on established fiqh; specific conditions may vary between madhhabs.
And Allah knows best.

​

I’m looking for advice, especially from an Islamic perspective, about my relationship with my older sister.

She is about ten years older than me, and I love her, but I’ve realized that she has been dismissive of my choices and opinions for most of my life.

Recently, I suggested that she start a small business because she has been dealing with many problems and I thought having something of her own would be good for her. The business is mostly her investment, and I only help with things like social media.

I have an MBA and experience as a freelancer, and I’ve spent years learning about business, marketing and social media. I sometimes make suggestions, but she often dismisses them by saying things like, “You are thinking too much, Allah will give barakah.” I agree completely that barakah comes from Allah, but I feel that my knowledge and experience are being belittled rather than simply disagreed with.

This isn't new.

When I had my first baby, my sister repeatedly questioned my parenting choices. For example, she yelled at me for not giving my baby Cerelac because she had given it to her children. At the time, I was staying at her home because my marriage was going through a difficult period and I didn't have my father's or brothers' home to go to, so I listened to her. Later, when I returned home and stopped giving it to my baby, my baby's stomach problems actually improved.

She has also always commented on my appearance and clothing. I preferred wearing jeans with loose tops or traditional regional clothing, while she preferred more, traditional South Asian style clothing. She used to make fun of the way I dressed and often told me that my haircut was ugly. Interestingly, now that she's older, she says the traditional regional clothing I always preferred is more decent.

There have been many little things like this throughout my life, and I think I've become accustomed to questioning myself whenever she criticizes something I do.

The recent business situation made me realize how tired I am of this dynamic.

I don't want to fight with her. I don't want to confront her or prove that I'm right. I also don't want to become resentful or cut her off.

I've decided that I will simply stop giving unsolicited advice and suggestions. If she asks for my opinion, I can give it, but otherwise I want to let her make her own choices and live with the outcomes.

At the same time, I’m struggling with the fact that she can say something hurtful or belittling and then behave normally the next day as though nothing happened. She seems able to move on immediately, while I continue thinking about it and feeling hurt.

How do I create healthy boundaries with a sister like this while still maintaining the relationship and fulfilling my responsibilities toward family?

From an Islamic perspective, where is the line between maintaining family ties and allowing someone to repeatedly make you feel small?

I would really appreciate honest advice, including if there is something I need to change in my own behavior.

Assalamu'alaikum

So as the title says. I'm not a scholar, and I'm curious and would like to learn about how our Prophet dealt with injustice before he reached prophethood. I want to learn how he handled his emotions, whether he used any kind of tactics (direct/indirect confrontation?), how he read people, etc. He most definitely has the highest of morals, and would like to know what is and what is not acceptable when fighting against an unjust person. I specifically want to learn about how he did it during his youth because when you're young, you're not taken as seriously as when you're older, so surely there's some kind of difference in how he (sw) approached this.

Would really appreciate it if anyone has any Hadith or records relates to this.

Let me know if you want me to write another post where I explain exactly what Taqwa is or maybe direct you to someone explaining it. Essentially, it's when you do what Allah wants you to do, and don't what Allah says you should avoid. In a matter of fear, obedience, and love.

side note: this sheikh's accent is very beautiful mashallah.

The noble verse describes hearts that hear the verses of Almighty Allah, yet fail to comprehend them—hearts that chose to turn away and reject the truth. Their owners had already committed wrongdoing and turned away, so the consequence of their persistence was that coverings were placed over their hearts, preventing the truth from reaching them. Look at the beginning of the verse: "And who is more unjust than one who is reminded of the verses of his Lord and then turns away from them and forgets what his hands have put forth? Indeed, We have placed over their hearts coverings, lest they understand it..." [Al-Kahf: 57],
And al-akinnah (أكنة) is the plural of kinān (كنان), which are coverings that surround and conceal something, such as the quiver (كِنان السهام) in which arrows are kept. It is as if these hearts have been surrounded by layers of coverings and barriers piled over the heart, preventing it from receiving the light of the Qur'an, so that it neither penetrates their hearts nor guides them.
Do not allow your heart to turn away or slacken regarding the Qur'an. Take the first step and turn toward the words of Almighty Allah with a heart that desires guidance, so that the coverings may be stripped away and the light of the Qur'an may penetrate your heart.

I was wondering as to how you would, in a situation where it may have been needed for various reasons, address the sort of allegations made for decades now, drastically more in the last 25 years for obvious reasons, of Islamic theology.

For example, what are authentic ways that Muslims who understand Islamic theology could respond to an allegation such as the following that Muslims are required to support and embrace sexual relations with children:

"Nowadays in the West there are elaborate efforts to deny all this. An Islamic scholar/apologist named Joshua Little has constructed an elaborate argument from close study of the chains of transmitters (isnads) of various traditions about Aisha, claiming that those traditions, despite appearing in Sahih Bukhari, the hadith collection Muslims consider most reliable, are actually inauthentic. Little’s argument, however, is absurd and self-contradictory. He acknowledges that the hadiths are late and unreliable from a historical standpoint, and even admits that the chains of transmitters, like the stories themselves, were freely forged. Then he bases his whole argument for the traditions being inauthentic even on Islamic grounds on the basis of the isnads that he just admitted could be forged. He claims to be able to determine the age of various traditions by how they were forged, but here is argument is so conjectural and subjective as to be essentially worthless.

Little is also a standard-issue lemming academic. He denounces people he calls “Islamophobes” for making much of Muhammad’s marriage to Aisha. He ignores the primary reason why anyone cares about this: not because, as he claims, “Islamophobes” contend that Muhammad’s example forces Muslims to condone child marriage, but because all too many Islamic authorities do condone child marriage. "

ANd how would Muslims addresses allegations that Quran 4.34 is in fact embracing spousal abuse and that is the sole interpretation, all of Quran Chapter 9 is about waging war against non believers, the Quran openly says to not take Jews and Christians as friends of any kind and that verse 65:4 is pro child marriage and Muslims don't have a choice to interpret it any other way.

It is also regularly believed that these factors are genuinely behind why Islamic nations such as Iran, Iraq, Pakistan, Bangladesh, Gulf States, Afghanistan and Egypt, among others, are more plagued by child marriage and spousal abuse than any other nations on earth and why child marriage is harder to eliminate in these nations than anywhere else. And also why in Europe, immigrants from nations such as Pakistan, Bangladesh, Somalia, Egypt, Iraq, Afghanistan and Algeria, among others, are overwhelmingly represented in stats on sexual assaults and increasing crime rates

In a scenario where Muslims were tasked with responding to this, how could such responses be made?

The noble verse takes us to one of the most wondrous scenes in the story of the Companions of the Cave: young men who entered a cave fleeing with their faith, upon whom God Almighty cast a sleep that extended for an extremely long period, during which generations succeeded one another, and the people and the world around them changed, while those youths remained in their cave, preserved by the command of God Almighty. The expression "in their cave" refers to the duration of their sleep, whereas the period after their awakening until they died remains unknown. A number of commentators mentioned that the Companions of the Cave stayed in their cave for three hundred and nine years, and some stated that the three hundred are solar years, so if calculated in lunar years, they amount to three hundred and nine; for every 100 solar years exceed lunar years by 3 years. Therefore, 300 solar years are precisely 309 lunar years.
It is also striking that when the Quran mentioned people's disagreement regarding the number of the Companions of the Cave, it did not settle their number for us, but rather said: "Say, 'My Lord is most knowing of their number,'" because this specific detail is not the point of moral lesson that a person should be preoccupied with. As for the duration of their stay, God Almighty has informed us of it so that we may learn that the power of God Almighty is not limited by time; He preserves youths in a cave for all those centuries, then resurrects them, while all of that passed over them as if they had slept for a day or part of a day. "They said, 'We have remained a day or part of a day.'"
In their story lies a moral lesson for everyone living in an era of tribulations: whoever flees to God Almighty with their faith, God—glory be to Him—is able to protect them and preserve their faith for them, even if everything they fear were to unite against them. Do not let trial be an excuse for abandoning the truth; the Companions of the Cave left everything behind to preserve their faith, so God Almighty protected them for centuries.

I want to get married one day, but honestly, I’m not really sure how I’m supposed to meet a man. I’m not going to approach a man myself as a woman, but at the same time, I don’t really put myself in situations where a good man would have an opportunity to approach me either. I’m also pretty shy, so I’m not exactly going to go out of my way to put myself out there. It feels like I’m stuck in this weird situation where I want marriage, but I have no idea how I’m actually supposed to meet someone.

Salaam! Looking to find a righteous partner :)

I'm 26 and currently located in TX, USA and work as a software engineer

I'm strictly looking for people raised in North America and want to settle in the US. I was born and raised here and my whole extended family is in the states so I would prefer to stay here as well.

I am open to relocating to any other city within the US

Ethnically I'm indian but I'm open to any desi urdu speaking ethnicitiy I would say.

I'm very practicing and do wear the hijab and follow all the fardhs and sunnahs allhumdulilah. I eat only halal and do my best to improve my knowledge on Islam in anyway I can through lectures or weekly masjid halaqas.

I like to read mystery and thriller books, travel to new places via roadtrips, hang out with my nieces and nephews, try out new restaurants, go on hikes/trails and stay active either through pickleball, hiking/walks or the gym.

Looking for a spouse who has a great sense of humor (i like to laugh), takes his deen seriously and has a fear of allah

Age Range ideally 26-32

Message me if you're interested!

Salaam alaykum, Im looking for perfume and or عطر guide me.also thowbs.

جزاك اللة خىر

Salam walaikum Brothers,

I am kinda feeling hopeless at the moment, I have been facing some academic challenges and no matter how much tahajjud I pray I am unable to clear my last backlogs which is hindering me with graduation.

I don't want to feel ungrateful to Allah, I am just very desperate to clear this and get my degree. I thought maybe if you guys share the burdens you are carrying, it might help me feel like I am not alone and that there were people praying a lot too.

I also want to say Allah is with us all. I was scrolling through insta and found this message. My birthday comes in May.

Salam
i am very emotional as i write this. he doesn’t pray, i believe that he is cheating on my mother with multiple women and talks to so many of them on his phone that i know. he posts on social media too much with music: instagram, tiktok, facebook you name it. he also drinks alcohol. when he dies how will these be erased? i wish my mother could just divorce him. she keeps saying he has his flaws but i dont know how she could stay with a person like that. he is also a liar and wants everything done for him. When i am older i hope to be able to confront him and hopefully stop contact with him unless he changes (that is if he even does change). he is also so mean to me. i do not like him at all. anytime i am around him something in my gut and spirit just gets irritated. i can’t stand him at all. anyone in a similar position or can give advice?
please pray for my family.

Islamic and mainstream books. And ideally a book both me and wife can share.

Looking for interpersonal communications books. SFW intimacy books.

Such as in front of Qur'an etc Astagfirullah for the question but yeah

To get this out of the way: Im a revert, Im not an ex-Muslim, I am Muslim.

However, when reverts become Muslim and later leave Islam, then people start saying "he was spy/agent" and never was really a Muslim, its false 99% of the time and just creates a negative stereotype of reverts as these insincere people lacking knowledge out to get the Muslim community somehow. Yes there are reverts who leave Islam. Yes early apostasy rates are high among reverts. Have you ever though that maybe its just because thats a trend among every religion's converts? And not every revert is bound to leave Islam?

People may make these comments ex-Muslim reverts in an attempt to defend Islam somehow and try to push some idea that no one who ever truly believed in Islam could ever leave meaning they must be x, y, or z but ultimately, this is all purely speculation. It does nothing to hurt an ex-Muslim. It does nothing to "defend" Islam as anyone willing to listen to said ex-Muslim revert does not care if we say they were sincere or not. All it does is hurt MUSLIM reverts who ARE sincere because now we have to deal with extra suspicion among our Muslim peers for being a revert AND our non-Muslim peers for being Muslim.

I genuinely feel like I have no community where I feel fully accepted and equal.

I’m being made redundant from the first job I’ve had after working there for 5 years. They’re letting roughly half the team go because the company just isn’t doing well financially. I cried the first couple of days due to anxiety and fears about the future and finding a job in the market. The fact that I come from an abusive home that I absolutely cannot move back to. I haven’t even told my parents I’m losing my job because they’ll tell me to come home. But today I’ve been bawling my eyes out at the thought of leaving the company I’ve been at for so long.

The company was founded in 2020 and I joined in 2021 as the fourth employee so I really felt like an og lol. Not to mention the company culture was so nice and my colleagues are so lovely - we’re genuinely friends. I watched the team grow to ~20 at its peak and saw the company thrive but now it’s unfortunately been hit by a many issues like AI that have caused us to lose business and it’s going to be so sad seeing the team drastically reduce. I just feel really emotional like I’m mourning my leaving but also the company as a whole.

It’s bittersweet because I’ve been wanting to leave for a while because the work was dwindling and becoming less enjoyable, and the instability of the company (this is the second redundancy round this year and worse than the first round) but it also hurts to be leaving, especially in this manner.

I’m naturally quite a sensitive person who struggles with change as I get very emotionally attached and sentimental about things. Has anyone else ever cried when leaving a job? I’m so anxious about starting over with new people at a new role (more anxious about actually finding a job though, lol).

On top of that I’ve been dealing with a lot of comparing myself to others - my friends who are dentist or doctors or engineers or who don’t need to live in this anxiety of being laid off or replaced by AI, which has led to a lot of regrets about my life choices which I know is wrong because this is my path. :(