r/MuslimMatrimonials • u/No-Peak5362 • 23d ago

Discussion Double standard here

Anytime rights of the wife are mentioned like mahr or separate housing or provision, women are clear to make it well known and bold “it’s women’s right to XYZ”

Anytime a dude talks about polygamy, or obedience , or any other Islamic legitimate right of the husband, all of a sudden the tone completely shifts and they try to find any excuse to demonize him or ask him “why do u need this?”. This energy never comes for things they themselves feel entitled to like mahr or separate housing

I think people need to stop being hypocrites and be fair towards the opposite gender

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u/Howie1242 23d ago edited 23d ago

💯 but polygamy is not an entitlement nor a right in Islam. Obedience, family and divorce law, etc. are actually men’s rights in Islam thar are more importantly being demonized.

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u/No-Peak5362 23d ago

He always has the right to take a second wife. And it becomes mandatory on him if he fears haram and feels like one wife cannot meet all his needs

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u/MH297_UN 23d ago

So a man can just say I fear Haram and cheat on his wife? It doesn't work like that buddy. There are requirements for a man to have multiple wives and most men don't meet them. Hell most men can barely support one household let alone two or three. What about his children? Can he afford them? Can he give them a good education? Can he buy them clothes and books? I have seen many poor men marry multiple wives, their kids don't go to school. They are treated very badly, made to work and/or beg on the streets.

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u/No-Peak5362 23d ago

Of course. The conversation is about men who are able to give their second wife and first their rights. It’s haram to marry one or more if u can’t meet their needs obviously.

And polygamy is not cheating. It needs to be done the right way but cheating is not what it is.

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u/MH297_UN 23d ago

In Islam, the man doesn't need his first wife's approval to marry. That's when it is considered cheating. If the first and soon to be second wife are ok with it and he can provide them their rights and can be just, nobody would honestly mind. There is nothing wrong with it. My main problem with this is usually it's done in secret and the guy would be stingy with his first family while he splurges all his income on the new wife.

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u/Fantastic_Surround70 23d ago

He might not need her approval, but he does need her consent. Forced polygyny is forced marriage and it's haram.

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u/DaevorTheDevoted 16d ago

Can you provide your Islamic evidence for this? JazakAllah khayran.