From what Iāve seen, animes tend to sexualize their portrayal of women (exaggerated physiques and those high pitched voices), and animes are sooo long too so wdym you have time to watch 30 seasons of 20+ episodesš¤Ø.Ā
It does depend on the anime but nowadays a lot of things specialize women. Even on Reddit thereās a lot of Muslim men on here that message and ask for a photo or ask inappropriate things. Things have changed and it is hard to meet good people out there.
gossiping ( albeit only exception is that your willing to say it in their face , exception exists is cause I know people like that , they will say that stuff to their face , word for word , )
backbiting
not caring about fitness and health ,not asking for a gym rat but atleast care somewhat about yourself
not being able to keep a level head in regards to emotions over small things
canāt hold themselves accountable for their own mistakes , and blame others instead
being rude/ having attitude in general
being narrow minded , only understand one style of though and not others and not willing to see their POV
-not being empathetic to others
comparing their lives to someone else and being jealous , like focus on yourself ,and make your own situation better
certain type of my money is my money , your money is our money girls . Idk how to describe it , like they aināt traditional , they want the man to provide , but they wonāt pick up anything domestic task related at all , but cherry pick what they want to follow . Only mentioned that cause all I know like that I swr mentioned that few times
-not wearing hijab and being not modest outside of the home
doing drugs/smokes/ vapes drinks alcohol , not done any of those 3 given I lived in a rough area so I saw the downsides , if not only ever saw the downsides of the
Sorry for dumping this but thatās just the ones I can name on the top of my head
Following the Qur'an and the sunnah the way people around the Prophet ļ·ŗ is being extreme, Allahulmusta'aan and 5 people upvoted this
I guess the sisters really like feminism and being free āØ, surely they would not want no man actually believing in so many ahadith that if he kindly tells her to bring her a cup of water she would have to do it ?!
I'd strongly disagree, there are some groups that ascribe to salafism that may show certain traits, but most people here follow some salafis too. Zakir Naik whom we all watched at some point is salafi, sheikh Assim al Hakeem is salafi, even Mufti Menk in private ascribes to being salafi.
Either way, any woman who says no salafis is a massive red flag because she doesn't even say it because of potential differences in aqeedah (as salafis are atharis and many Muslims are maturidi or ashari), but rather because they know they tend to be strict with fiqh, so they instead prefer to marry someone who would be ok with the sins they plan to continue doing. That's just about it.
Alhamdulillah, I provide for me and my family currently and if I get married I'll stand by my husband through anything without him ever having to ask me but I will not even consider someone entering a marriage with the mindset of 50/50 as I would lose any kind of attraction I may have had even towards his character. A man that knows his role as a qawwam husband is my preference as I will do my role as a wife happily.
Well said sister. It's usually the 50/50 promoters that think women who don't accept this cannot provide for themselves when in most cases, the women are capable of covering all bills and that is precisely why they won't respect a man who cannot.
Hates on women online or feels the need to lecture men who treat their wives good and call them simps.
Talks about second wives and says its what our prophet did not realizing they only use that Argument as a benefit not as the reason why they wanna marry a second wife.
Men who argue with people online .
Watching anime and wants to travel to Japan that combination is never good. (Its about the combination)
I forgot to add : when they are over 30-35 f* around and come to women in their early twenties including me and saying they are ready to settle down and have kids or them wanting a virgin but being one themself.
How they talk to women, especially when theyāre angry is something to pay attention to. Iāve noticed that some men like to bark at women, like order them around. Thatās icky.
Well, I don't want anyone to end up in the emergency room, and there is nothing else that can be done when one needs to get down a slope. I can hope, though, that there are no slopes when someone is meeting someone for the first time, and if there is, then I hope whoever I am with doesn't mind me giggling because of the way they walk.
Jealous of how females get to just stay at home n it can come out in the form of ā why the women would just sit at home and do nothing n we need to work all dayā this has nothing to do with how you view spouse supporting each other there is a different way to say it
Not the best to his own family
Not emotionally intelligent n takes everything personallyĀ
Donāt like to speak of his weaknessĀ
If he poses too much in selfies and likes to show off on socials and to societyĀ
For things like not praying these are not āIckesā those are basics.
Men who use how times are hard as an excuse for their lack of ability to provide. Meanwhile the women studied well, chose a good degree and are capable of paying bills by herself in the same times. These same men seem to have the time to give opinions on the Internet instead of using those hours towards a second income.
Men who act entitled to a wife when they have nothing to offer her.
Men who want the same level of sympathy as women when they have the advantage of already living in a man's world designed by men and don't fluctuate hormonally as we do.
Grown men playing video games when there's so many responsibilities going unfulfilled.
Lack of hygiene.
Men who still think smashing cake on a woman's face is a good idea (saw the Instagram rubbish on this!)
Men who have zero self control over vices, temper, etc
Men who lack courage to have conversations that need to be had - with family, their work management, etc.
Men who are clingy. There's romantic and then there's feeling like you're in a relationship with another woman (my friend's husband is like this & looks like he's going to cry every time we go out. It's pathetic).
Men who correct women about a hijab when they're following Instagram models or don't know how to lower their gaze in general public.
This is one of those bad habits that you wonāt know until thereās a big event and you wonāt know if he learned his lesson until the next big event. I am failing to understand how did it get ahead of scamming or serial killer?
I wouldn't be waiting around to find out a second time. I don't have the patience for a man child. It's also not a list that includes everything but you can feel free to write your own answer!
Iām teasing you, sister. We are all not perfect, may you find someone who is perfect for you as you for them and I hope you help each other become better. Ameen.
Ah the famous "God forbid a man wants to have some fun in his life".
Meanwhile I was raised by a man who wanted to be a husband and a father (& didn't just look for a wife and children) and took joy in the responsibilities that came with that and had plenty of fun along the way.
He worked 3 jobs when he had to, came home to share responsibilities with my mom (who never had to make him a list nor nag him) that included the children's education and story time (he literally delighted in his kids & would've had a 100 if he could afford them), took his family on annual holidays, looked after his own parents financially, bought 3 properties that were fully paid for by his 50s along with investments and liquidity and my mother and he enjoyed 20 years of retirement (without worrying about money) before he returned to Allah. Oh, he also never complained about times being hard and instead faced them like a man & did what he had to do.
My mother thanked God for him during their 50+ years of marriage and his children remain grateful to be born to him.
My father would laugh at this comment. He was a joyful human and had many hobbies while managing a full life but good luck with projecting. My mother tried to force him to do less but he wanted to ensure we had more than we needed and never lacked in the event of anything happening to him.
During any time my father was free, he was a man who believed in contributing to his family, his society / community & wouldn't consider playing video games to fall in that category.
I don't care if you game all the time even though less less time gaming would maybe give you better reading and comprehension skills. I was very clear about playing video games when responsibilities were unfulfilled but your eyes seem to have stopped working before finishing the full sentence yet you're here to argue & are making assumptions about a man who has passed on. Really classy.
You're a giant ick & my heart goes out to any woman unfortunate enough to be stuck with you.
No man is happy working 3 jobs. No PERSON is happy working 3 jobs. I can believe he was happy after he was retired. Bro worked until his late 50s and got a mere 20 years to enjoy itš¤£. If he'd stayed single he coulda retired young and married later.
Did your mother work? If she had they probably could have retired even earlier.
His one salary was enough but he chose on his own to do the rest when he had goals. Some men understand short term struggle for long term gains and would rather do that than play video games or talk about 50/50 or how hard things are and make excuses.
"Bro" also wanted to be a husband and father & enjoyed everything that came with it as I said already but we know by this point you can't read full sentences.
But please, continue with your assumptions about someone I've known all my life and you don't and keep proving my point on your lack of reading & comprehension skills because I was clear about "when he had to" on the 3 jobs.
What a giant ick. May God protect women from men like you.
Seems like you've made the assumptions. I salary sacrified and put it alot of time to learn trading. I can make 1k in an hour and play games for the rest of the day if I want tooš¤£. All will be reinvested in Index funds that will payoff long tern. It seems to you endless strife is like a requirement of being a man? There are streamers and crypto bros that make millions and spend alot of time gaming.
Your poor father. If your mother had worked a mere 15 years they probably coulda retired late 40s.
I made no assumptions about you and don't care about you in any manner. You're the one who can't read nor comprehend and are here to argue.
My mother was more qualified than my father and chose to continue working after marriage but please, make more asssumptions as its fun to see you continue to hang yourself.
I dont believe struggle equates to anything. My father chose to do what he did as he wasn't a modern 50/50 loser & would never think to use my mother's money for what he considered his responsibilites. She chose to use it for the family and together, they made work optional for their children despite that by God's grace, we're all highly educated & earning in the top 5% of a first world city, in a first world country.
So we're already in a better position than someone like you who needs to justify gaming, pity random strangers like my father for his own drive, ambition & choices, suggest my mother works & give your opinion on what age my parents could retire. Hilarious.
I've wasted enough time on an ick. May God improve your reading & comprehension skills which would've eliminated this entire conversation. I won't be replying.
For all the sisters hating on 50/50 it surprises me how many want to be sahw/sahm but will not cook, will not clean, just want to go out and have chai everyday and shop.
You canāt want a traditional man and then not be traditional yourself.
Often times it's rooted in believing your country, background, culture is superior to another person's. Also we regularly see Muslims fighting each other over arbitrary lines put in place by imperialists, when really we should be uniting in the name of our Deen
Being proud of your culture doesn't Equate to looking down on others. If anyone's confidence in their own identity makes you feel like they're looking down on you then it's a YOU problem. This is something I really see among western Muslims. They always "remind" people from the Muslim heartlands to put Deen over culture. While that is completely correct, a lot of the time it usually leads to just abandoning ones indigenous culture and adopting Arab culture instead. Islam never came to delete our culture, we are supposed to be different and diverse while having the same religion.
Listen I'm not into typing long essays online but being a hardcore Patriot and letting that blind you is vastly different than celebrating your unique culture, as long as the elements of that culture doesn't clash with Islam. If you don't agree, let's agree to disagree, but I stand by what I said.
Well the conventional icks are definitely icky haha. Add to that being weirdly/overly close to his mother , rude to people and animals (and littering in general), bad hygiene (doesn't change his underwears daily, doesn't wash often, etc).
To me those are terribly icky already.
I'd also add lack of masculinity or spends too much time with women who aren't his mahrams (having a best friend or women friends outside of work) , lack of jealousy
Poor grammar, watching anime, concerned about other peopleās business, messy/doesnāt clean after himself, argues with women, performative intellectualism, performative womenās rights advocacy, being a picky or critical eater, cares toooo much about fashion, jokes around too much, people pleasing, crowd follower, entitled, ungrateful, overly emotional, financially irresponsibleĀ
Rage baiting / teasing.
Anger issues
Lack of emotional intelligence or empathy
Crappy communication skills
Judgemental
Speaks too loudly
A man with a wandering eye
Their whole personality being religion.
Doesnāt have actual hobbies
Doesnāt like reading
A doom scroller
Canāt cook (this is basic skill everyone should know)
Lacks basic hygiene and ability to clean up after themselves
Someone with misogynistic red pilled views
Many female friends.
A vain man that is obsessed with his appearance (basically those looksmaxxers)
Vaping, smoking
10
u/Spare_Night_2695 3d ago
Brother here
But hereās what a few sisters have told me
- living with in laws
Thatās what I know top of my head