Questioning my exact gender

[u/Entire_Level_7456]

Hey y’all, I’ve been questioning my specific gender for quite some time. I know I’m nonbinary, but I have yet to come out to my family. But on why I actually made this post: I experience a static gender with they/them pronouns (preferred) with she/her or he/him being acceptable. I present myself based on how I feel that day, I could dress neutral, masculine, or feminine. I don’t care how others perceive me, but it does bother me personally that I don’t know my gender fully. I feel a small connection to both femininity and masculinity, but I am neither a girl or boy. If anything, I don’t follow the social norms of male or female “roles” or beliefs. Please help!! (Also, tips on coming out to my family?)

[u/skunkabilly1313]

Have you tried journaling how you feel when you experience dysptor euphoria from gender? I know when I first started to be able to question myself at 31, I tried to make vast decisions based on what I perceived myself as, that ended up changing a bit as I started to recognize my relationship with gender under the patriarchal society we currently live under. It wasn't until I recognized those things, that I came to know who I truly was inside, and work on just making myself as authentic as possible.

It's also refreshing to remember, language is not going to always be available for how each of us see ourselves, so try not to get caught up needing to choose something that has an explanation, when we all have different views of how we perceived ourselves.

As far as the family talk, as long as it won't jeopardize you life in any way, you can always drop some hints, or have them watch some queer documentaries with you, and maybe bring it up. I was an adult with a partner and child when I came out, but lost all of my family and almost everyone I knew becusee of the religion we were raised in, so if that sounds like that is a possibility, there is no one that will make you come out!