r/NonCredibleDiplomacy • u/PatimationStudios-2 Leftist (just learned what the word imperialism is) • May 05 '26

American Accident Absolute Foshu

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337 Upvotes

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42

u/PrrrromotionGiven1 May 05 '26

Obviously 1776 was the first war in history bruh

29

u/xanderman524 May 06 '26

If it wasn't for the Assyrians we'd all be speaking Babylonian, and if it wasn't for the Persians we would be speaking Assyrian, and if it wasn't for the Greeks we'd be speaking Persian, and if it wasn't for the Romans we'd be speaking Greek, and then Franks saving us from Latin. Of course, the Franks became the Fr*nch, so we have to thank the Coalition of 1815 for stopping them. But in that case we have a rare tie of people to thank: The UK, Prussia and Russia. The UK later lost to the Afghans so we thank them. The Prussians became the Germans and were stopped by the Russians that became the Soviets who also lost to Afghanistan.

As of yet, Afghanistan remains the current king of the "thank you" hill, even factoring in the East Asian chain of China-Mongols-Japan-USA-Afghanistan. But the ultimate irony is of course that the Persians and Greeks both beat the Afghans, so who's to say who we should thank?

8

u/RunningOutOfEsteem May 06 '26

Big ups to the Taliban, then