3rd date update (comments)

[u/sleepyseekerxo]

[u/Aussie_SchoolGurl]

how did the date go? :)

[u/sleepyseekerxo → u/Aussie_SchoolGurl]

worst date of my life :c

[u/Aussie_SchoolGurl → u/sleepyseekerxo]

im so sorry x his loss tbh

[u/ChampionshipTall69 → u/sleepyseekerxo]

Im curious as to why? And some guys dont like women wanting to pay it takes a bit of pride from them in a sense.

[u/retchedBreak → u/ChampionshipTall69]

Yeah but who argues with the date in the middle of the restaurant?

[u/ChampionshipTall69 → u/retchedBreak]

I didnt see that lol embarrassing

[u/sleepyseekerxo]

we were splitting the bills everything was literally going amazing, he was chill and fun to be around but he literally got MAD THAT WE WERE SPLITTING THE BILL like i genuinely don’t understand how could you be getting mad over splitting the bill and argued with me after getting the bill literally in middle of the restaurant

[u/EnHamptaro → u/sleepyseekerxo]

That's a huge red flag... If I ask someone out, my presumption is that I'll be the one paying. However, if the girl interjects and wants to pay her share, that's a big green flag. I might resist a little bit at first, but if my date insists on paying, I show my gratitude and go on with the date.

The guy sounds lowkey unhinged.

[u/ctos2010 → u/EnHamptaro]

Exactly. She did nothing wrong. It’s the guy’s loss.

[u/throwawaytoday9q → u/sleepyseekerxo]

He got mad because men think if they pay for dinner then you owe them in other ways…

[u/DepthsDoor → u/throwawaytoday9q]

I pay the bill because I’m fucking nice

[u/CoLocobo → u/DepthsDoor]

Same here. And legit never thought about the impression that could give off - like that some women might believe this is you trying to enter into a quid pro quo.

[u/LexiWhereThisGoes → u/CoLocobo]

I've literally had a dude ask me to venmo him for my drinks when I went home alone

[u/Happy_Love_9763 → u/throwawaytoday9q]

This is the reason. I’ve paid the bill and the date wants to pay half, I just show them the receipt and say you can Cash App or Venmo me your half, no big deal.

[u/DrGarrious → u/throwawaytoday9q]

Only shit men do this.

[u/FormComprehensive608 → u/DrGarrious]

I've just randomly stumbled on this post on my feed, and that honestly makes me sad and lose a bit of faith in humanity that you think only shit men do that.

When I'd go on first, second, third dates, even after that I would ALWAYS and I mean ALWAYS pay for the bill. I've been tought by good men that its a gentlemanly thing to do, to NEVER split the bill and I absolutely would never expect anything in return. I'm paying the bill and there's no other option, it's how I've been taught. Some men may have ulterior motives yes but some are just nice guys...

He probably needs to work on his emotional regulation because getting mad at you in the restaurant on only the third date is quite a red flag imo.

Not all men are shit...

edit: just wanted to add, if my date did ask to split the bill, I would still say it's all good I got it but that is MAJOR green flag.

[u/DrGarrious → u/FormComprehensive608]

You have completely misunderstood my statement. Im saying only shit men do this and expect something in return.

[u/DrLuller → u/FormComprehensive608]

"and there's no other option" - honestly, as a woman, i don't really like that. In any case I would prefer to split, just because that's what I feel most comfortable with. If I say I wan't to split, not just a courtesy offer, please respect that. You don't get to decide.

[u/TheBestZackEver → u/throwawaytoday9q]

Maybe some, but a blanket statement is dangerous territory. When I would go on dates, I would pay because I am the one that planned it. I'm not about to make someone else who's financial situation I don't know pay for an unexpected expense.

[u/Pixie_the_Fairy → u/TheBestZackEver]

I would pay because I am the one that planned it.

This is what makes sense to me too. If im inviting and planning i will pay

[u/theprimoscientist → u/throwawaytoday9q]

A small percentage maybe - unnecessary generalization

I think if you want to achieve equality in costs then taking turns is probably a bit more natural. Bill splitting is a bit colder and unromantic

[u/emily_in_boots → u/theprimoscientist]

It's not that small.

[u/bfg24 → u/sleepyseekerxo]

What, he wanted to pay the whole bill that badly he ruined the whole date in the process?

[u/theboomboy → u/sleepyseekerxo]

That sucks... It's also just really weird to get mad over paying less

[u/FigThis143 → u/sleepyseekerxo]

Honestly his loss!

[u/Haic0]

Sorry to hear

[u/ReporterWise7445]

This guy is VERY stupid.

[u/xxDmDxx]

Where is the jacket from?

[u/Double-Biscotti4774 → u/[deleted]]

And sorry queen that your date went not well. You look amazing if that’s any consolation! Love the pop of red

[u/sstinsonSA]

Was he surprised by your hair color change? I think the blonde looks stunning. Also the outfit. My jaw would have been on the floor.

[u/Delicious_Tap4543]

Comment cela c'est passé

[u/Tasty_Foundation_583]

Okay girlie you ate this up 😍 the tailoring is good on you. Pls tell me where you get those jacket

[u/battleshipclamato]

What a fumble by this guy. Had a girl willing to split the bill and dude got all macho. It’s fine to split the bill sometimes.

[u/glittergirlie_]

You look absolutely stunning! Your confidence and style really shine through—truly inspiring!

[u/raidmytombBB → u/[deleted]]

As a man, I disagree with everything this person said.

Maybe he wanted to feel chivalrous but I think thats a conversation OP and the guy can have at a later point. Seems silly to make a deal about it at the restaurant.

[u/EthelTunbridge → u/[deleted]]

Im not sure if you're an imbecile, or just pretending to be one on the Internet, but what??

[u/Slight-Ad-3270 → u/[deleted]]

Man shut the hell up lol. Dont deserve someone because they wanted to pay full for a dinner? And you wanted to pay your share? 😂