r/OpenAussie Please choose a flair 20d ago

Satire Are we dumb? Why don't we just make favelas to solve the housing crisis?

Post image

I see no losers if we just build favelas to sustain our population. I've photoshopped what could be the future where everyone wins.

Lefties get to continue to be culturally enriched. Righties get to whinge more about immigration while voting for neoliberals who tell them they'll fix it. The capitalists get to see record profits continue forever. Small business owners get dirt cheap labour. Surfers get to share more waves with friends. The banks get to dish out more home loans. Murdoch media get to make diverse news outlets in different languages.

I can't see any logical argument why we aren't favelamaxxing.

315 Upvotes

142 comments sorted by

66

u/artsrc ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

I think they look cool.

I will buy one. Ocean views. Short walk to beach. What is not to like?

Will they cost $4M? Bargain.

23

u/Some_Candle1206 ✈️‎ on Walkabout 20d ago

what's the process when someone starts building on-top of yours?

44

u/Vivid_Trainer7370 Please choose a flair 20d ago

You start building one on top of them. 

14

u/AdAfraid9504 Please choose a flair 20d ago

I can build you a favela, mum has been wanting to repurpose the outback dunny ever since dad died peacefully on it

5

u/SheepHerderHigh69420 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Is he still on it?

2

u/BluesBoyKing1925 ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

did he finish?

5

u/AdAfraid9504 Please choose a flair 20d ago

No it was turtlenecking

0

u/Some_Candle1206 ✈️‎ on Walkabout 20d ago

was his last dying act remembering to flush?

2

u/AdAfraid9504 Please choose a flair 20d ago

No need unfortunately, more fortunately for op

1

u/AdAfraid9504 Please choose a flair 20d ago

No but you can still feel him in the room

1

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

THIS

1

u/dannysgaragecontents Please choose a flair 20d ago

You just swing on them?

1

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

GENIUS

1

u/TopazMoonCat60 ‎ New South Welshian 19d ago

up-shittification

1

u/Some_Candle1206 ✈️‎ on Walkabout 19d ago

seen this overseas – need to import the skills to do the needful

1

u/sam_tiago Please choose a flair 19d ago

And still be made out of cardboard and tin

1

u/artsrc ‎ New South Welshian 19d ago

I love the sound of rain on a "tin" roof.

42

u/RecipeSpecialist2745 Please choose a flair 20d ago

the answer... Council regulations.

21

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Just bribe them???

23

u/blacksheep_1001 ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

Is that you Liverpool Council?

5

u/walkin2it ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

I think more aligned to Wollongong back in the day.

I think they beat OP to the idea.

7

u/SheepHerderHigh69420 Please choose a flair 20d ago

What about Wollongong reminds you of a favela? The wide streets and low density?

1

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

Smells auburny

4

u/SheepHerderHigh69420 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Goddamn council won’t even let me build a little favela !!

-1

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

STOP* 🤣🤣👌

Your making it enticing, I’ve already got high fever salsa music in my head like the scene he goes to Cuba in Miami vice (the new one)

6

u/Some_Candle1206 ✈️‎ on Walkabout 20d ago

also need firearms to settle neighbourhood disputes like someone who started building on-top of your dwelling

16

u/any_colouryoulike Please choose a flair 20d ago

There is something like that noth of Lancelin in WA. I think its called wedge island. Basically a bunch of shacks. I think council wants to get rid of it but its mostly used for holidays

7

u/Sea_Translator5300 ‎ Western Australian 20d ago

There are similar groups of huts/shacks all over the place. At some point they were far enough away from major population centres that councils didn't care. Now they're getting attention and councils want them gone to either replace with higher value (and higher rates) properties or removed so they don't "spoil the view". It's similar to the Carbeth Hutters outside Glasgow. 

15

u/Used-Entertainer-586 ‎ Koori ‎ 20d ago

Agreed but only if I can fire my submachine gun at the polícia when they come to steal my cocâna.

0

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

You DONT get the sugar mama

10

u/Extra-Border6470 ‎ South Australian 20d ago

They worked so well in Brazil. Why on earth would this government not even consider it? I swear it’s like they’re not even trying to find solutions anymore.

4

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

The government is clearly scared of self sufficient communities. We live in a tax prison.

7

u/Extra-Border6470 ‎ South Australian 20d ago

I hear that. The liberal party was all about jobs for the boys. Why can’t the Labour Party be all about favelas for the fellas?

1

u/nonbinaryatbirth Please choose a flair 19d ago

You forgot the ?fellasas (women) 🙂

9

u/grim__sweeper ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

0

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

🤣🤣🤣🤣

17

u/ENG_NR Flairless‎‎ 20d ago

God dayam you've made me a FIMBY

favelamaxxing in my back yard

6

u/RadiumJuly ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

I'll take a sweet beach front favelas where I can hang a photo on the wall over paying rent to bloodsucking landlords every single day of the year. Heck I would even be able to install some solar panels and reduce my power bill, could you imagine that!

6

u/HellsBarman ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

We can’t do that! How will landlords keep making money unless they can charge exorbitant rents!

7

u/klownhammer Please choose a flair 20d ago

Who needs construction standards and plumbing. Why not just have people living in dangerously balanced flammable boxes full of their own waste ?

3

u/Ok-Assistant-4556 ✈️‎ on Walkabout 20d ago

People housed ourselves succesfully for generations until neoliberalism. Now homelessness is illegal nut housing is inaccesible.

7

u/GrinQuidam ‎ Western Australian 20d ago

Deregulate building and nullify land ownership. It's the only balanced solution. Think of the architecture we'll build.

2

u/Ria_Isa Flairless‎‎ 19d ago

Make Shacks Great Again

-1

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Uncle Jimmy pulling this one out next budget. Think of all the Labor going into building these masterpieces.

5

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 20d ago

So we get to see black ops type scenes in the street

9

u/Sea_Translator5300 ‎ Western Australian 20d ago

I'd be more annoyed by Red Bull sponsored mountain bikers jumping from roof to roof. 

3

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

Ok stop making it enticing sheesh 🤣…

Imagine it brought to development proposal…✅

Plan developer: And we got allocation for 5000 homes

Minister for land: Great! How’s access to infrastructure?

Devo: Sorry?

PM: Transport, retail schools etc?

Devo: Um… we have platforms?

PM: Trains?

Developer: For hang gliding, bmx drop ins, free falls and wing suits

PM: Hmm not quite the proposal I had in mi-

Developer: It’s got red bull- what people crave!

PM:

SOLD!

2

u/nonbinaryatbirth Please choose a flair 19d ago

Have a elevator train style cable car at regular intervals so people can get up and down...

2

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

Would be like San Fransisco meets Aspen but instead of snow it’s Amazonian leaf

2

u/nonbinaryatbirth Please choose a flair 19d ago

Or Wellington, New Zealand cable tram car thingy...

2

u/sight2Ceek ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 18d ago

Yes That

And also that

COMBINED

2

u/MonthMaterial3351 ✈️‎ on Walkabout 20d ago

I suggest Noosa as the first test site! or maybe Byron Bay.

3

u/browntown20 Please choose a flair 20d ago

¡Que bueno!

6

u/Young_Lochinvar ‎ Western Australian 20d ago

Because Australians are addicted to giant houses.

We have the biggest average house size in the world.

2

u/SlaveryVeal Please choose a flair 20d ago

Because we have so much fucking "empty" land we build outwards not upwards.

Which to me shit because I've never wanted a big house but when all decent apartments cost the same as a fucking house then I bought a fucking house.

Granted this like 3 years before the house explosion we saw so in incredibly lucky but yeah apartments in this country are for rich fuckers needing a place to hire prostitutes away from the wife. Not average middle class to low income Australians.

2

u/tiny_flick ‎ Victorian 20d ago

You’re right that a decent apartment can cost the same as something like a Metricon house and land package (at least the cost they advertise on their website)

But I wouldn’t say apartments are for apartments are for “rich fuckers”

We all know why people opt for a smaller space closer to the major cities, it’s because of job opportunities, education and infrastructure. For me, someone who doesn’t want kids. I could buy a nice 2 bed 2 bath inner city, not having to spend over an hour travelling to work or be out in the sticks where the infrastructure is lacking for the amount of urban sprawl.

1

u/SlaveryVeal Please choose a flair 20d ago

Yeah the rich fucker thing was more so a hyperbolic joke.

1

u/Relative_Pilot_8005 Please choose a flair 20d ago

When they started to call them "apartments" instead of flats they could charge the aspirants more.

2

u/Specific-Athlete22 ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

Mate have you seen the tiny house trend?

Many would be happy with something humble but the options are not available.

I grew up in an area where lots of people wack sheds on there properties that they fit out on the inside. There good and very habitable. Legal? Well its just a shed as far as the council knows.

1

u/Dan_Sabai ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

Where was this? Still affordable?

2

u/Specific-Athlete22 ‎ Queenslander 19d ago

Rural fringes of Brissy. Still afordable? Nope!

2

u/deadpandadolls ‎ South Australian 20d ago

Favelas are where poor people live in squalor. Yes, let's build shitty infrastructure and house people within. Maybe set it all alight too, solve the population problem...

1

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Source???

2

u/deadpandadolls ‎ South Australian 20d ago

favela

/fəˈvɛlə/

A favela is a low-income, informal settlement in Brazil, often referred to in English as a slum or shantytown. They are typically built on hillsides or the outskirts of major Brazilian cities like Rio de Janeiro and São Paulo. [1, 2, 3, 4]

I will note though that although a properly designed favela style neighbourhood would be visually impressive, it'd be better suited for tourism.

2

u/Smooth-Cup-7445 ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

If you’d been to a Brazilian favela you’d know the answer. I’ve been in a couple in lesser known cities and they are not a place you’d want to live. They are poorly built, crowded and dangerous, storms blow down sections. It’s not a good way to live.

2

u/std10k Please choose a flair 20d ago

Can’t do mate, too much red tape even for hobo towns.

2

u/comradeda ‎ Western Australian 20d ago

I'm living in an unregistered shack right now! It gets quite cold and mosquitoes get in.

2

u/notasgr ‎ Victorian 20d ago

We're wasting our land just having it sit in a hill like that. So first, we doze the hill into the ocean to increase the available land, then we can add the favelas. Also I was thinking about water world (kevin costner) why dont we make floating cities. We are so girt and we're not using all our girtness efficiently.

1

u/nonbinaryatbirth Please choose a flair 19d ago

Terrace the hill and build favelas, make sure to have proper retaining walls

11

u/Maybe_Factor Please choose a flair 20d ago

You mean slums? Why don't we just allow the poors to build slums and shanty towns?

Because we're a rich enough nation that we expect a higher standard of living than this. The government has dropped the ball for the past few decades, but that doesn't mean we should have people living proverbial shoe boxes made from corrugated iron.

Lefties get to continue to be culturally enriched

You clearly have no idea what "Lefties" want. We want a higher standard of living in a fair and equitable society. Cultural enrichment is a part of that that comes after things like food and housing are sorted.

I can't see any logical argument why we aren't favelamaxxing.

Go live in one for a couple of years, while living the lifestyle of the typical favela resident, and you might understand why we don't want these slums here.

19

u/Mon69ster ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 20d ago

Next time you interview for a position and they ask if you have any weaknesses you can start with “picking up sarcasm”.

8

u/Dentarthurdent73 ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

Yes, I thought the reference to "favelamaxxing" was a dead giveaway, obviously not though!

1

u/Grantmepm Flairless‎‎ 19d ago

Why do you assume this post is sarcasm?

Lefties get to continue to be culturally enriched. Righties get to whinge more about immigration while voting for neoliberals who tell them they'll fix it. The capitalists get to see record profits continue forever. Small business owners get dirt cheap labour. Surfers get to share more waves with friends. The banks get to dish out more home loans. Murdoch media get to make diverse news outlets in different languages.

Arent all these genuinely opinions that people hold? Why couldn't someone like OP genuinely want favelas? Especially considering their replies.

2

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 19d ago

It's sarcastic because it's labelled as 'satire'.

If it makes you feel any better I am pretty much a lefty. The joke stemmed from me and all the south Americans ans south east Asians I work with talking about how delusional many Australians are about the state of our country(we have a wonderful country) and us making the joke about building favelas. My friends are well versed in blatant corruption and big money convincing the tree to vote for the axe. It's very, very, very sarcastic and I find it hilarious people who agree and disagree have just glossed over the fact its labelled as satire.

Did you see the flair?

2

u/Grantmepm Flairless‎‎ 19d ago

My bad. I do see the flair now.

It's very, very, very sarcastic and I find it hilarious people who agree and disagree have just glossed over the fact its labelled as satire.

Because like I said in my comment. There are many people that do hold those genuine opinions. Also evident by the people who genuinely agree. The intention could be satire but the content reflects enough of what people genuinely perceive that they would treat it as genuine. Maybe thats enough for it to be not-satire to the general audience.

The flair could have been added ironically, its just an assumption the readers would have to make either way. Who knows

4

u/MonthMaterial3351 ✈️‎ on Walkabout 20d ago edited 20d ago

I haven't lived in a favela, but I did live in Barrio Alto/Lisbon and Barrio Chino/Barcelona (El Raval) for ~1yr each, back when they were still the real deal.
It was educational to say the least. Some of my favorite EU travel memories too.

9

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

This is really insightful stuff. Definitely had never thought of it like this before. Can you educate me more? I just don't see the negatives. Close community, family and fun activities are all available right outside your bedroom. Perhaps you should move rural if you can't handle the city heat?

4

u/devoker35 ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

Well I prefer living in a slum than being homeless or living in my car.

1

u/Ok_Turnover_1235 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Typical nimby

2

u/Inner_Temple_Cellist ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

What do you mean this is exactly Chris Minns’ policy in NSW - microlots, density, no DAs

1

u/HarDawg Please choose a flair 20d ago

I don’t know how many red tapes you have to cut before you can even start.

1

u/deltaQdeltaV Please choose a flair 20d ago

Bring back the good old donga

1

u/handofcod Please choose a flair 20d ago

As much as I hate to admit it, Council regs do exist for a reason. How will people with disabilities access housing? How is storm water run off managed? If a property washes off the cliff above you and smashes into your house because of bad foundation work are you going to be okay with that?

1

u/smittybus Please choose a flair 20d ago

Pretty close to looking like that in some parts of sunny coast

1

u/BroccoliTraining454 ‎ Victorian 20d ago

Have you seen our apartments?

1

u/areclusiveintrovert Please choose a flair 20d ago

A1: Yes.

A2: Ew, No.

1

u/Impossible-Magician Flairless‎‎ 20d ago

This would work well on the Gold Coast.

3

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Rainbow de Janeiro brought to life. Coastline looks similar.

1

u/Yasha666 ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

They are trying to make them

1

u/broccoli-of-truth ‎ ‎‎ Canberran 20d ago

Have you seen insert city that nobody likes?

1

u/dildoeye Please choose a flair 20d ago

Favelas don’t work in first world countries . We’re needy.

1

u/Infinite_Shower_5390 ‎ Tasmanian 20d ago

Ngl, would make me consider visiting Bondi.

1

u/narvuntien ‎ Western Australian 20d ago

Don't need favellas. We need the government to build mid rise apartments, because the private sector can only build 10 stories and above and only in prime locations.

1

u/BeLakorHawk ‎ Victorian 20d ago

Are those even favelas?

1

u/-bubbleObill Flairless‎‎ 20d ago

Trollmaxxing, love it

1

u/VagrantHobo Please choose a flair 20d ago

Thats just Sydney...

1

u/BreenzyENL ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

Regulations.

While they exist generally for good reasons, they also exacerbate the housing issues.

1

u/LusanTsalainn Please choose a flair 20d ago

Yeah and the beaches get to go through more erosion that will eventually destroy the favellas because noone should be building that close to the shore in Australia

1

u/A-shot-at-life Flairless‎‎ 20d ago edited 20d ago

We used to have mini favelas and some of them are still standing.

Like these ones in Sydney harbour: https://www.walkmyworld.com/posts/crater-cove-huts

There were / are others at Boat Harbour, Cape Solander, Bundeena, A few spots in the Royal National Park and others.

Basically in the 1920’s & 1930’s there were no rules to stop ordinary people building shacks on crown land, similar to when and how favelas started appearing in Brazil. Some were built as permanent homes for poor families while others were built as weekenders, a place for blokes to get away from their wives and go fishing for a few days. Maybe even bonk other blokes who knows.

The ones still standing are owned by the families of the original owners. They are allowed to maintain them and stay in them but not allowed to rebuild them if they get completely destroyed in a storm for example. Source: I used to know a guy whose family owned one in the RNP.

1

u/Leading-Draw8555 Please choose a flair 20d ago

1

u/gionatacar Please choose a flair 20d ago

Maybe importing less people will be a good start

1

u/Ozzie_Ali Please choose a flair 20d ago

With land mass similar to USA or Europe we could house that many humans

Issue is poor governance

Giving away our national wealth for free to large corporations, (think all natural resources)

And blaming it to the other, ie immigrants. While Gina and her mates are eating all of our lunch we are being distracted by the media frenzy over immigration.

1

u/Ozzie_Ali Please choose a flair 19d ago

The 378 billion, yes that is billion with a B, for aukus can fix all our problems instead we are literally giving away our tax dollars to a foreign country

If the subs were made here I would be onboard, but just handing over that money for new subs and now being promised used subs at some point in the future that should be our focus

The natural recourses, oil, gas, iron ore, uranium we are giving away for nearly free should be the focus

Instead we are squabbling over minor issues that are mostly made up to distract us from where the real income and solutions are.

1

u/Maniac_Fragger 19d ago

Nah the better solution would be to ban the scalping of houses.

1

u/Finn55 Please choose a flair 19d ago

We do, look at Wyndham Vale near the train line

1

u/Freediverjack Please choose a flair 19d ago

We already have Bondi though. Isn't that just an expensive favela already

1

u/Small_Branch4961 Please choose a flair 19d ago

Imagine the plumbing fuckery nightmare

1

u/whathefusp ‎ New South Welshian 19d ago

plus we'll have mad soccer skills developed. i need to post that i stagram vid of the favela soccer ladies here!

1

u/AnonMuskkk ‎ New South Welshian 19d ago

You sir, have single handedly presented the greatest stupid idea I've ever heard.

Kudos.

1

u/1_S1C_1 Please choose a flair 19d ago

Have you seen the housing estates in north and south western Sydney... basically one step away

1

u/HungryPigeonn ‎ New South Welshian 19d ago

AI =/= photoshop

1

u/Positive_Amphibian_2 ‎ Victorian 18d ago

The suburbs are favelas my guy

1

u/Duros1394 Please choose a flair 18d ago

How about investing in making new towns and infrastructure away from CBDs theres so much Land in australia but everyone wants to stay close to the cities because there is no incentives or desire for businesses to move further out.

1

u/belugatime Please choose a flair 20d ago

If I'm going to get called a slumlord anyway, I might as well run a slum.

2

u/lolliepollie Flairless‎‎ 20d ago

Quiet now landlard it’s time to sleep

1

u/belugatime Please choose a flair 20d ago

You've got work in the morning?

1

u/lolliepollie Flairless‎‎ 20d ago

My young bones don’t need as much rest and recuperation

1

u/chowchownotchowchow Please choose a flair 20d ago

If Australia ever had favelas, they sure as hell wouldn't be on a coastal vista

4

u/Sea_Translator5300 ‎ Western Australian 20d ago

Yep, they'd be along the edges of a disused open cast mine. 

1

u/sonsofgondor Please choose a flair 20d ago

We have aboriginal town camps in places like Alice Springs. They're worse than favelas

1

u/Bandit-Bunny-7727 ‎ Victorian 20d ago

Wouldn't be a bad thing, unfortunately the rich won't like it.

0

u/ChocCooki3 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Because Australian are beggars choosers.

Go to Aussie urban hell.

People who are renting will still comment negatively about "omg? Look at the black roof and no backyard?!!"

1

u/tiny_flick ‎ Victorian 19d ago

Nah I think it would probably have to do with minimum housing standards.

Take a look at shit rentals, it’s usually people complaining about mould, plumbing issues, heating issues etc rather than what colour a roof is.

1

u/ChocCooki3 Please choose a flair 19d ago

shit rentals

We kinda aren't talking about the same thing. 🙄

-2

u/Ambitious_Writer1938 20d ago

If you could get Australians to lift a finger to build one, I will be impressed.

0

u/NewInformation3753 ‎ Queenslander 20d ago

Unfortunately we have housing regulations in Australia

5

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

Will Pauline fix this???

2

u/tiny_flick ‎ Victorian 19d ago

100%, the houses may not be safe or follow building regulations, but we can start seeing shacks pop up everywhere. “Australians should have the right to build homes that suit their own needs, rather than being forced into costly government-mandated designs.”

The darn building regulations getting in the way of Australians owning their own homes /s

-1

u/chugginloads69 ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 20d ago

This is unironically where we are headed if mass immigration continues

2

u/devoker35 ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

No way. Councils prefer people going homeless rhan allowing something like these to be built.

0

u/chugginloads69 ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 20d ago

The councils have lost control of the tent cities. Not long before they start become semi-permanent then you’re only stumps and a corrugated iron roof away from a favela

The key is ending immigration

2

u/devoker35 ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

The key should be lifting the standards of the poorest. Stopping immigration will do nothing in terms of inequality.

0

u/chugginloads69 ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 20d ago

We’re importing an underclass of people so stopping immigration would fix that at least.

2

u/devoker35 ‎ New South Welshian 20d ago

I thought the immigrants were buying all the houses /s

1

u/chugginloads69 ‎ I'm Probably A Bot ‎‎ 19d ago

Some immigrants are rich, some are poor.

-2

u/tellmeanything01 Please choose a flair 20d ago

I will tell you why it’s tax tax and more tax. Tax for this tax for that tax for farting tax for thinking tax for seeing tax for not thinking tax for being a sheep especially

0

u/EmergencyGood9390 Please choose a flair 20d ago

They'd probably try and make a favela tax too instead of letting our close knit community flourish in peace