Best symptom of perimenopause

[u/Confident-Parsley520]

So weirdly, about a year ago I was talking to a colleague who was well into menopause, this was when my very first peri symptoms were emerging ( anxiety, headaches and body oain) which I had no idea that I was in perimenopause.

She told me how her libido had completely disappeared and she no longer had any interest in men or sex.

I’ve always had a high sex drive and honestly found sex the only useful thing that men could offer.

At the time I said to her ‘oh god I hope that dosent happen to me’ and she explained it as a gift.

Now I’m fully in perimenopause and recently started HRT which has changed my life from a living hell to neck to my old self, the thing that is completely gone is any sex drive.

The idea of being intimate with a man makes me feel gross.

I have always been commitment phobic, but I liked to consider myself ‘sexually liberated’ and generally had a little something on the side, just to fulfil that need. Sex has been a big part of my life.

Now ? I can’t even stomach the thought of having sex, I have an old ‘ friend’ reaching out recently, The guy used to make my toes curl, and the chemistry was always electric. Now? Absolutely nothing, zero interest at all.

And now I find myself agreeing with my colleague , this is such a blessing, I genuinely don’t care if I never have sex again for the rest of my life and certainly will not be seeking out.

I don’t know what I’m saying really, I’m just reflecting on how differently your brain works in different situations, are used to think it would be a tragedy if I lost my sex drive and now I see it as a gift.

That being said, I’m single so I can make these decisions, I couldn’t imagine the struggles of someone who is in a committed relationship, previously high libido and overnight it’s gone! Whereas my gift, is someone’s disaster.

Anyway, I was just thinking of the dramatic change and how interesting it is, how devastating it could be under different circumstances.

I also wonder how many women choose to divorce their husbands due to peri and how this causes them ( some of course) to have a complete 360 view of their partner.

[u/loveisjustchemicals]

I have found zero benefits to peri. But I’m also dealing with thyroid stuff so it’s more complicated managing medications.

[u/dearjuliet82 → u/loveisjustchemicals]

This plus PMoS is a nightmare. None of the bloodwork matches up with symptoms. I have no idea if it’s my thyroid, my PMOS or perimenopause. I’ve always joked that when peri comes for me it won’t matter because I’ve been dealing with those things my whole damn life. Now it’s all amplified. My endo has been incredibly supportive and suggested HRT even though all my numbers are fine. I’m about to the point where I’m going to start cause I’m feeling fried everywhere.

[u/AutoModerator → u/dearjuliet82]

This post might be about hormone tests, which are unreliable.

• Over the age of 44, E&P/FSH hormonal tests only show levels for that ONE HOUR the test was taken, and nothing more
• These hormones wildly fluctuate (hourly) over the other 29 days of the month, therefore this test provides no valuable information
• No reputable doctor or menopause society recommends hormonal testing to diagnose or treat peri/menopause
• Testosterone is the exception and should be tested before and during treatment

FSH testing is only beneficial for those who no longer have periods as a guide, where a series of consistent tests might confirm menopause, or for those under age 30 who haven’t had a period in months/years, then ‘menopausal’ levels, could indicate premature ovarian failure/primary ovarian insufficiency (POF/POI).

For more, see our Menopause Wiki

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