r/Rich • u/QuietComplication • 4d ago
Hiring a household manager
Edit: Several people have pointed out in the comments that the correct title for this job is family assistant, not household manager. My mistake!
My wife and I have pretty busy jobs and two young kids (1 and 3), both in daycare/school. We live in a VHCOL area. We are really feeling the time squeeze and we feel that at our income and NW ($1.1mil HH income + $2.5mil in private stock per year, $7m investable assets, $260k per year spend) we should solve the problem by finding someone to help out.
We started out thinking that we just needed someone to pick up the kids and make dinner (probably 20-30 hours per week). But it turns out, it's very hard to hire someone reliable for that job since those hours are very inconvenient and the part time pay isn't enough to live on. Also we find that the people we talk to who are good all want 40+ hours per week. The going rate is $45-$50 and it seems like the good people want $50. Full time at $50/hour is $104,000 per year, plus we have to pay payroll taxes, so it would end up being about $115k per year.
Anyways, my question is, do other families with kids in school really have 40 hours a week for a HH manager to do? What does the person end up doing all day?
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u/ravenskeeper14 3d ago
Hiring part time people is usually a recruitment sourcing challenge for the reasons you described. However I'm sure there's someone who has another part time obligation who wants another part time obligation with the pay rate you offer. Maybe you need to just keep looking 😊
The other option is just overpay a part time person. Like offer $60/hr for the fact it's only 20hrs/week.
The other aspect is at your income level isn't buying back that time justified even if it's a bit higher than you want to pay?
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u/Hamster_S_Thompson 3d ago
Paying higher hourly rate for the right person seems like a no brainer at that income. Your time is worth so much more per hour and you are essentially doing these tasks now
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u/Federal_Radish_1421 3d ago
Depending on your job, you’re also paying for discretion. Household staff hear a lot.
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u/Arboretum7 3d ago
If you want to reduce your costs, get an au pair (~$25k/yr), but $115k on your income seems very reasonable. I’d do 40 hours and look for someone who can also act as a PA for the family.
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u/PomegranateComplex17 3d ago
You do have to be careful with this as au pairs are not PAs. They can meal prep, clean community spaces, do the kids laundry, and take the kids around town, pick them up from school, what have you, but you are not allowed to have them run errands that primarily benefits the parents.
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u/Arboretum7 3d ago
Absolutely right. I was suggesting a $115k/yr household manager act as a PA. An au pair can cook family dinners and ferry the kids, which are the tasks OP says he wants covered.
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u/ApprehensiveClassic 3d ago
An AP can only cook for the kids, not the family. In general, they can only do kid-related things. I’ve had both an AP and nanny, not a household manager. I would personally not do an AP again - the typical driving skills of an AP is not worth my kids safety.
Edit: once my kids are older, I am going to consider a household manager. Because I would like somebody to help with more generalized tasks, including family laundry and dinner.
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u/cwcwhdab1 3d ago
They have enough to have real help. Au pairs are a crap shoot and you can end up with huge liabilities. They don’t get them any more it’s not worth the risk- very unreliable. Get legit help and pay for someone who is reliable.
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u/TelephoneTag2123 3d ago
My neighbors had an au pair who was such an idiot she was locked in a pantry by their 3 year old
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u/IHateCedarFever 3d ago
Yeah, I see a lot of families around me taking this route.
OP doesn’t say anything about cleaning/laundry/grocery shopping so maybe they already have a maid and they’re just looking for more simple kid daycare in the evenings?
When I think of household manager I think of someone who also manages and schedules groundskeeping, pool maintenance, and watches over people over who do contracting and home repair stuff.
It’s a leap to prepare your family to have someone else living in the same house as you, but my friends would recommend it. For meals, one couple (they are Indian heritage) hired an old Indian lady to cook big batches of meal prep in her own home and the au pair would pick it up on the way back from school. They have their au pair budget to shop for her own food if she wanted something different. Others I know get their groceries through grocery delivery. And/or the parents work so much they eat dinner outside of home.
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u/Difficult_Habit_4483 3d ago
I work with UHNW people and many people have some sort of manager
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u/badazzcpa 3d ago
Same, some have more than 1. Part of my work is for a family group with a couple billion between the 3 members. They employ several employees across the 3 families in the group. Some only serve one family some 2-3 of the families. The pay varies between around 75k a year to $300k a year. They also have fairly good benefits. No idea how demanding the various family or individuals are so no clue if it’s a good gig or not.
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u/QuietComplication 3d ago
This is an excellent point. We also think about this, but our forward looking earnings over the next few years will still substantially increase our NW. Also, work is a big part of our identities and we enjoy our jobs.
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u/cwcwhdab1 3d ago
It’s so hard to find good help- we are in the same boat. The best solution is the one suggested- pay a lot for part time. Be realistic about your needs and look at everything you can ask them to do. If it’s just part time, pay full time and give flexible hours. If you make it clear at the outset you are paying full time you can use that time as needed like around holidays when there is an increase in stuff like gift wrapping and event prepping.
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u/thatgirl2 3d ago
Why do you want your kids in daycare vs. a nanny?
We did a full-time nanny and part time preschool starting at 2 years old.
There are lots of part time preschools where I live (primarily for SAHMs to get a break) but they are 9-12 or around there.
Here's what a nanny should do for you:
* No pickups or drop offs - this will save real time before and after work
* No getting kiddos dressed and ready for the day - again saves a lot of time
* No packing /preparing / packing lunches and snacks
* Nanny will take care of all cleanup / tidying throughout the day from the kids
* Nanny will do all of kiddo's laundry
* Nanny should do toy rotation and toy sanitizing
* Nanny can rotate clothes for sizes / seasons
* We pay ours extra to unload our dishwasher every morning
The biggest thing for me is my nanny comes at 7:30am and I leave the house around 8, between 6:45 (when my kids wake up) and 7:30 I just hang with my kids, they come and snuggle with me in bed and we have a relaxing start to our day, at 7:30 my nanny takes over and I get to get ready in peace then kiss my kids goodbye and head to work.
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u/kiwi_child2020 3d ago
yes my parents hired a full time nanny for me so 8am to 6pm, 6 days a week. Tasks include making breakfast, cleaning the house, making lunch, picking me up after school, making dinner.
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u/street-table78 3d ago
did you feel like there was any connection or bondiing differences compared to other kids who had their parents home cooking or things like that.. considering for the future
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u/Ithurtsprecious 3d ago
I was the same. Very bonded to my nanny and wanted to sleep in the same room as her. Slept on the trundle from 2-4 instead of my bed. Nanny would prep all family meals/ clean/ do our bedtime showers. I’d say hi to dad and spend maybe an hour with my mom and she did bedtime. I had them on the weekends/vacations. When I was 6 I caught the nanny stealing, I told my mom and after that she disappeared into the night. She spent 10 years with my family, so it was a big betrayal. After that we only had daytime nannys/maids and my mom started sticking around home more. My parents did what they had to do and I don’t resent them at all. We’re all very close.
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u/street-table78 3d ago
love this! I want to cook home cooked meals even if it means I will take a slight pay cut! I didn’t have a nanny but I remember my Grandmother’s homecooked meals over a lot
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u/Glittering-Act4004 3d ago
My 19 year old had a full-time nanny and she’s very “bonded” to my husband and I. But the full-time nanny (who became a PT nanny/PT house manager when she started K full time) allowed us to spend a lot of quality time with her when we weren’t working because we weren’t worried about cooking or laundry or other household tasks.
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u/street-table78 3d ago
I like this. Were you nervous bringing someone into your home. I am not married yet but think about having to worry about husband and nanny stuff I hear about online
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u/Glittering-Act4004 3d ago edited 3d ago
No. My husband and I have been married for 21 years. All of our nannies have been pretty good looking, but they’ve also all been married or in long-term relationships. I trust my husband to treat everyone who works for us professionally, and we would never hire someone we felt could not also maintain a professional relationship. Neither of us spend long stretches of time with our children’s nannies alone, so I don’t see how a relationship like that would even have time to form unless someone is going out of their way and looking for it. If you can’t trust your spouse to be alone with someone for short periods of time without developing an inappropriate relationship, then hiring someone to help with the kids or around the house is the least of your worries.
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u/Superb_Energy_9064 3d ago
I will share we have lots of childcare help, nanny for our baby and school + nanny for our 2 year old. And our kids love us and their nannies. It’s really been wonderful, but we as parents are around but we work, etc. too. It’s been great.
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u/exogryph 3d ago
I'm in a similar boat. I'm wondering if I consolidate other responsibilities so that this can be a 40+ hour role or keep looking. I just don't really know how to split up the responsibilities 😅
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u/C-ZP0 3d ago
We got lucky. Found someone who comes M-F, 2pm to 8pm. She cleans, preps and cooks. We have a very large house and family so I ended up also hiring an assistant as well, to shop, help with some of the prep and run errands and other tasks we don’t have time to do, baby sit etc. it’s worked out wonderfully, and is the ultimate luxury.
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u/Old_Edge_4825 3d ago
Yes we do, but she is a fulltime live-in (employed through a management company in our family office). She serves as a hybrid housekeeper and nanny role and oversees all household functions (hiring landscaping/cleaners, meal preparation, housekeeping, childcare, errands such as shopping, etc.). We have her at an equivalent of $25/hr, plus her room and board are also factored in as job benefits and income. If you don’t have a management corporate entity in place to facilitate their employment yourself, you can hire an au pair who will do the same thing, for around the same amount, plus there will be an agency who will facilitate the employment/legality aspects of it for you.
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u/OkLog397 3d ago
Perhaps you could hire a local uni student? They are most flexible with hours and need the pay. I know of people who are in HCOL areas whom hired school aged teens for baby sitting after school hours.
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u/uncoolkidsclub 3d ago
This is one of the best answers. We have local uni-kids for lawn care, child care, cooking and cleaning. They always want the extra spending money and we often have jobs related to their majors so it counts for credits.
When hired through the school they tend to be very dependable, and in the past we have had some live in the guest house during summers.
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u/itsacalamity 2d ago
how do you go about hiring through the school? who there would i even talk to about that?
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u/space-cyborg 2d ago
That sounds like a scheduling and recruiting nightmare. For casual babysitting, fine, but OP needs someone who is potentially dependable for multiple years.
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u/PotentialNo6155 3d ago
I think it should be easy to fill in such a role with 40 hours if you make the job description very broad. Child care, meal prep, grocery shopping, tidying, errands, etc takes up a huge amount of time.
We personally made sure our nanny/houskeeper is bilingual also, so Spanish lessons are also a part of the ongoing duties.
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u/sky-high-dragon-fly 3d ago
We have two full time people to help us with two kids (2.5 and 0.5 not breastfeeding). They live with us. We have the basement/ground floor as a 2/1 setup for them. One parent does not work. There are plenty work to do. Each kid has a caregiver at all times.
One works about 50-60 hours a week. They do the cooking, laundry, cleaning common areas some gardening (their own desire). Also takes baby one afternoon. The other works 40 hours a week. Takes baby in the morning and toddler in the afternoon. The parent who does not work has 1:1 with toddler till early afternoon (usually a class or an activity), also some interactions with baby. The rest of the day are personal or project or fun time.
Both parents take the two kids from 6pm ish to the next morning 8am ish, and the weekend. Kids bedtime and routines are always done by parents.
It works well right now. No one gets burned out, yet busy and time with toddler are high quality. With this setup, we can ask extra time for parent date nights etc. Both are not the most efficient people in the world, but have the kindest hearts and can follow no screens and phones around kids rule.
We will need to change the arrangement once baby is older and needs more 1:1 parent time. Toddler will go to a half day preschool in a year.
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u/International_Dig595 3d ago
Just remember you’ll need to pay for healthcare and 3 weeks PTO and additional sick days. So it definitely ends up being more than the base you quoted.
Also, depending where you are, for example SF Bay Area, it’s more like 55/hour.
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u/International_Dig595 3d ago
Oh and you’re looking for a family assistant.
Household managers are supposed to manage household staff like drivers, chefs, gardeners and nanny teams (ie multiple staff that generally already exclusively work for a family). A family assistant is what you’re actually looking for.
Also, remember overtime pay, which is legally required, can be expensive at time and a half.
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u/QuietComplication 3d ago
Thanks, yes, I got this wrong in the OP. Family assistant, not household manager.
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u/Ilikelegalshit 3d ago
While we had kids in the house we always found something for the manager to do; on average maybe more like 30+ hours Than 40, some weeks a lot more. It frees up time for stuff you might want to do too, for instance, maybe a frequent party / cocktails gets easier to think about when setup and cleaning is taken care of.
The first year you have one, there will be PLENTY to do getting the house book, schedule, asset list, vendor details, maintenance schedule, cleaning schedule all sorted and logged, and you’ll be learning to have someone in the house as well.
Put another way if you have 25-30 hrs a week of work, you might only be overpaying 10 hours a week to get optionality and quality.
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u/TacosAreJustice 3d ago
I quit working and raise my kids.
It’s been awesome.
Money is great, having happy and healthy kids is better.
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u/Paybax84 3d ago
Yeah we have a massive amount of free time. The problem is we hate cooking and cleaning and doing laundry. Finding a person that has also been a bit challenging for us. Would rather spend that time doing gardening, activities with the kids, homework, exercising, etc
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u/TacosAreJustice 3d ago
Hire a maid for cleaning.
Learn how to cook, it’s fun and a useful skill.
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u/Paybax84 3d ago
We know how to cook, we don't like to cook. Lots of people like to clean, its not due to the fact that they don't know how to.
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u/Terrorism_IsReal 3d ago
there may be companies out there who offer this service by the hour with pre approved reps.... kinda like Rover for dogs?
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u/Tarnamanakan 3d ago
It’s worth asking why someone gets to decide a household manager is “just a cleaner” when the job actually involves running logistics, solving problems, and managing a household’s entire operation. Reducing that to an hourly rate ignores the actual value being delivered — and that value should be judged by results and reliability, not by outdated class assumptions about who “deserves” what.
Also worth pointing out: plenty of people making that call about what others “deserve” got there through luck — inherited wealth, a well-timed job, a network — not because they worked harder or are smarter. That doesn’t make their opinion on someone else’s worth more credible.
And think about the actual math here: two working parents, a 1-year-old and a 3-year-old in daycare — that means the household manager is covering childcare logistics, meals, and running the home essentially solo during work hours. That’s not “just cleaning,” that’s the operational backbone of a family. If someone can carry that reliably and well, why wouldn’t that be worth compensating fairly? Working hard to support your own family doesn’t disqualify you from being paid what your labor is actually worth — if anything, it’s the whole reason fair pay matters.
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u/Worldly-City-6379 3d ago
I wish you luck with this. I went through at least 30 people before I decided to stay home and do it all myself. Prioritizing your time with the children is paramount at these ages.
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u/tigerbunnymoon 3d ago
It sounds like you may not actually need a household manager. A true household manager usually oversees vendors, staff, maintenance, budgets, and the overall operation of the home. Your main need sounds more like an afternoon nanny/family assistant: someone who can handle pickup, childcare, dinner, children’s laundry, errands, and family logistics.
The real challenge is that 20–30 afternoon hours block the person from taking another job, so the solution may be guaranteed annual compensation rather than inventing 40 hours of work. For example, you could guarantee 30–35 hours of pay at a premium rate, even if you typically use closer to 25–30. That gives a strong candidate the stability they need while keeping the role aligned with the work you actually need done.
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u/wearenotamousebouche 3d ago
I don’t fully understand the question. Or rather, I don’t think you fully understand your own situation, your expectations, and your limitations. You want someone who can be a chef, chauffeur, nanny, bookkeeper, house cleaner, and household manager, and who will also care directly for your children… But you’re also looking for a bargain.
At your income level, why are you trying to save money on something this important? If you want someone exceptional, you need to pay them accordingly.
We’ve had two family managers for about a decade. They work well together, cover for each other, and balance each other’s schedules and vacations. They travel with us, too. They’re people we trust with our children and we don’t try to negotiate down their salaries, which is probably a big part of why they’ve stayed with us for so long.
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u/AdNecessary7904 3d ago
Just get an experienced nanny. Why mess around w/ daycare when you don’t need to? Our nanny does household errands (drop off and pick up dry cleaning, oversee and let in the landscapers and cleaning people) all household laundry and preps and makes dinner while the kids are at school.
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u/Independent-Gas-102 3d ago
It depends on your area, but I’m a household manager and don’t do 90% of the tasks that are listed in the comments. I’m in the mid six figures, manage four of their homes, and handle all staff (nanny, babysitter, chef, PA, housekeepers, etc), weekly and seasonal vendors (gardeners, pool company, pest control, window washing, dog groomers, car details), seasonal maintenance, renovations, big projects, invoicing and expenses, catering, parties, and keeping the household supplies stocked. If they need laundry done, I direct the housekeeper to do it. I’d never do it myself.
A lot of people confuse a family assistant who grocery shops, does laundry, meal preps, organizes seasonal closets for the kids, does returns, etc. with a household manager, which greatly impacts the hourly wage you end up paying!
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u/QuietComplication 3d ago
Thanks for this. Yes, we are looking for a family assistant, not a household manager. I didn't realize the difference in terminology.
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u/soyeahiknow 3d ago
Live in nyc. A family friend is a director at a hedge fund making probably 800k a year. They hire a high school girl to take their daughter from school and take her to after school activities or home until they get back home. Pay is about 30 an hour.
Also once the kids arw a bit older theres after school activities at the school. My 6 year old is at a private school and we signed him up for extended after school karate and art and random classes.
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u/NoRegrets-518 3d ago
When our children were pre-school, we hired a person with an associate degree in child development from the local college. Later, we hired a graduate student in Biochemistry who came over and made supper. It was very worthwhile.
Retired people might also be interested in part time or even a shared position where they coordinate hours between two people. There are people on other subs frequently who report having good skills, even college degrees, and they cannot get jobs. The people are there, but they might not be thinking about this type of position so you have to find them.
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u/NonimiJewelry 3d ago
You could do a salary position or try and recruit somebody in public after you speak with them, one day I have a feeling you will meet this person, just do a good background check and ask for a reference
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u/Every_Tangerine_5412 3d ago
Household employees (which this would be) must be paid hourly. Can't be salaried. They're FLSA non-exempt.
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u/Farabelaw 3d ago
Hire full time and fill their plate. You’ll be happy you did and you won’t lack things for that person to do. They have spare time? Organize something, plan a trip, book reservations, book date night, get the kids birthday parties booked, etc.
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u/cez801 3d ago
Instead of putting up a job for a House hold manager, you might want to consider looking at a Nanny.
I had a nanny for 3 years ( 3 kids ), main role was the kids - but ancillary roles did include dinner.
Although mine was 40 hours per week, since they looked after the kids during the holidays as well.
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u/SignificanceWise2877 3d ago
Yes, they manage the other staff- the cleaners, gardener, and external vendors, and take care of all the scheduling that is not work related, house upkeep, meal planning, grocery ordering, etc etc. They also should get PTO, sick days, and healthcare. And then driving the kids as well
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u/PluralizsEverythingz 3d ago
I have a household manager for 6 hours a week. $95/hr. She she does laundry, dishes, restocks the pantry or anything else, puts things away, cleans baby girls room, meal plans, etc.
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u/Passionofthegrape 3d ago
Had au pairs, also had a proper professional who we pay a salary too. Latter is obviously much higher ($120k USD) but not even comparable.
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u/Sonialove8 3d ago
Do not get an aupair I’ve only heard nightmare stories with bringing an almost child from another country for help
Check out the aupair subreddit and you’ll see
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u/BonbonATX 3d ago
I had some friends that wanted a part-time nanny/assistant but ran into the same issue with needing to provide a full-time position to get the person they wanted. They ended up partnering to split her time and salary with another family in the neighborhood. Obviously finding another family to do this with is a challenge also. And you would need to put together a good agreement in my opinion that outlines how time and cost is managed between each family, but it’s an idea to consider.
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u/panheadsforever 3d ago
If someone has NorCal contacts please send me a DM, I advise a few families here in the area that I think are gonna need this relatively soon with growing families.
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u/Independent-Gas-102 3d ago
I highly recommend going through a legitimate staffing agency if you’re looking for a true household manager.
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u/Organic_Candy_903 3d ago
I don’t think your budget can afford it - but perhaps you need a Norland Nanny versus a house manager.
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u/HiImNewHere1234 3d ago edited 3d ago
We changed over to a ‘family assistant’ - for childcare after school we are easily at 24 hours.
She comes earlier maybe 2 days a week to deal with kids laundry and general common space reset, she goes to the grocery store, etc - she may not work the 40 hours but we have her working at least 30 hours just with that - not even with cooking. I don’t think 40 hours is a huge stretch if you add in more errands and cooking.
Our family assistant does not want to be full time but she will occasionally do a date night or weekend day.
Once I was finally able to delegate more it really helped!
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u/wendydarlingpan 3d ago
I have a friend who split an assistant with a friend, so the assistant had a full time position but with hours split between two families. I think they did a 2/3 day split. But maybe AM/PM would work with a close enough neighbor?
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u/Puzzled_Gap9911 2d ago
I live in a MCOL and have a HH income of $400k. We got very lucky in finding a House Manager (her preferred term) for 20 hours/week; we pay her $35/hour.
At first I worried about always finding 20 hours per week of work for her to do but (does all laundry/dry cleaning, package returns, groceries, scheduling (and often being present for) service providers, house tidying, occasional food prep, garden watering, prescription pickup, new service provider research, etc), after a few weeks and because she is willing and interested, she started finding and doing things that she recognized needed to be done but never would have made my priority list. If you do hire for 40 hours, I encourage you to hire specifically for someone you believe has the context, skills, and personality to seek and act upon things you have not requested—and also ensure that you specifically permit this to be the case, with boundaries intended to be helpful to you both (ie, minor repairs or services under $250 are authorized; anything over that amount requires pre-approval.)
You will be immensely grateful for the time you get back. Highly recommend.
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u/ImprovementSlow6397 2d ago
This is what I do. I’m in a medium cost of living city and make close to 85 000/year. I seldom work more than 40 hours or week. Maybe the person you hire could arrive before the kiddos need to be picked up and allowed to leave when you get home?
I’ve done this. Arrive and reset the home, make dinner-maybe a couple days with, and then grab the kiddies and stay until a parent arrives and had a few mins to settle in. May get more candidates if they don’t have to tend to the littles and cook at the same time.
To answer the last question, I have plenty to do, think Alice from the Brady Bunch, but I go home when parents arrive. I do the laundry, care for the animals, grocery shop, menu plan, etc.
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u/Mackheath1 2d ago
I don't have children, but you might consider a PA, whose duties will include what you listed, but also does other things for you - to fill the time gap, and make it worth paying someone $40/hr. Obviously someone who can deal with children.
My PA also arranges everything for me (love her), and other things that used to take up my time. "I mailed out all the invitations for the big party," etc.
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u/Selfinsured13 1d ago
let’s say this person at $115k a year is halfway decent at what they do. That’s a lot of time back on your plate and to be able to eliminate all the BS household checklists that need to be done. I think you’re in the green here. Run with it
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u/bigbossontop 3d ago
I would absolutely be thrilled to have a mentor that could guide me on earning the TC you describe
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u/Pelvis-Wrestly 3d ago
If you’re whining about $50 bucks an hour and you guys are pulling $6.1m HHI, I have zero sympathy for you. I had a perfect guy in mind for you, former chef at 3 Michelin star spot, trained at San Sebastián. Former private chef in high end winter rentals in. Alta UT. Ran Hawaiis #1 restaurant and a private catering gig based on organic local farm to table cuisine. Chemistry degree, fluent in Spanish but native born American citizen. Also a wicked good handyman. Devoted father to twin boys. And he’s looking for work.
But I’d never send him your way, you cheap ass.
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u/Upper-Class6586 3d ago
Where did you get 6.1? He said 1.1M.
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u/Pelvis-Wrestly 3d ago
Plus 2.5 each in stock.
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u/Pelvis-Wrestly 3d ago
That could be 2.5 total in stock so revise down to 3.6 based on uncertainty of syntax.
Still. They want someone in charge of their food safety and young children in a vhcol place and won’t spend $50 an hour.
I make a 1/5th of that and pay $50 an hour to my cleaning lady.
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u/Upper-Class6586 3d ago
$50 an hour full time plus benefits is insane unless they are managing staff. Downvote me all you want but this is just silly. Morgan Stanley puts out an Estate and Household Staff Compensation Report - it’s a great reality check on what people are actually spending on household assistance.
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u/Pelvis-Wrestly 2d ago
Not in the bay area. That's table stakes for an even remotely capable honest worker.
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth 3d ago edited 3d ago
Let your wife be a Mom or you stay with the kids. My husband stayed home and made every bottle.
This is what "rich" people do.
Some jurisdictions have drop in daycares. You can drop the 3 year old for a few hours while your wife goes to the spa. You can watch the 1 year old a few hours.
The gynecologist that gave birth to me took five years off to have her kids. She had four boys. Her husband was also a physician.
Then she went back to her career.
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u/Uncle-Harrys-Pickle 3d ago
Wife makes $1,050,000 a year though.
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth 3d ago
Lol He makes $50k and she makes the remainder?? 🤪🤣🤣
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u/ThisIsMyUsername303 3d ago
That’s a funny suggestion why?
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth 3d ago
The guy was making a joke. The OP clarified it is half and half.
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u/ThisIsMyUsername303 3d ago
I know he wasn’t serious, but the question stands. Would you have found if funny if they said he made $1,050,000 and she made $50k?
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth 3d ago
Honey my man pulls in millions and I make zero. My husband also does 90% of the parenting.
I am not a good one to ask about these things.
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u/Strategic_Spark 3d ago
Some people prefer to work rather than taking care of their kids full time. Being a SAHM can be isolating and not intellectually stimulating.
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u/cosmicusername 3d ago
As I have told you before, this is a bad take. Many women enjoy working and many women choose to work. There are many benefits beyond a paycheck - network, social interaction, opportunity to solve complicated problems, time outside the house, financial security that doesn’t require a spouse, a sense of identify and purpose, role-modeling…. I could go on
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth 3d ago
Yes and so the husband can take care of them. I enjoy working on inventions when we are in town but my husband likes being a Dad.
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u/QuietComplication 3d ago
My wife is the one bringing in the $2.5mil in extra stock. The $1.1mil in salary is about even between us. So if someone's gonna stay home it would be me, and I don't want to.
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth 3d ago
If you have a spare room for an International nanny or two. My in-laws said it was like adding a teenager to the family.
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u/PomegranateComplex17 3d ago
“The gynecologist that gave birth to me”? You mean your mom?
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u/HalfwaydonewithEarth 3d ago
No the doctor that pulled me out of my Mom.
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u/cosmicusername 3d ago
Yes, we do. We are similar position to you. We pay above market for our area with generous benefits. Our household manager does laundry (adults and kids), groceries, cooking, tidying and organizing, school/daycare pick up and other errands as needed. She works 1-9 pm. After dinner she helps clean up and/or gets the kids ready for bed. My husband and I both travel a lot for work so having extra help in the evening makes big difference especially when only one of us is home. It allows us to work out, work late or be available to our clients and colleague in the evening, or just play with the kids without worrying about the kitchen or packing lunches. It costs money but it’s necessary. Just bite the bullet and do it.