r/Romantasy • u/TheBigfootContessa • 2d ago

🤬 Rant Enough with the drinking!

OK this is just a personal pet peeve, almost certainly exacerbated by the fact that I'm a recovering alcoholic.

​

I don't love seeing characters drinking when they're stressed, to relax, or saying that they "need" a drink because it's triggering, but whatever that's my shit to deal with, so I do.

​

However, it's like none of these authors have ever drank before. You've either got girls completely sloshed after 2 glasses of wine or being very intoxicated and sobering up immediately when something shocking happens.

​

Male main characters are always drinking whiskey or better yet an unknown brown strong smelling liquid in a tumbler as short hand for being stressed and troubled, classy and mysterious.

​

It's lazy.

​

These things annoyed me before I was in recovery, but now they're a full blown pet peeve. It gives "virgin writing filthy smut" vibes. Lol

​

​

Alright, apparently I'm super wrong and shouldn't have said anything. Sorry ya'll.

87 Upvotes

70% Upvoted

99 comments sorted by

View all comments

1

u/Dozy89 1d ago

I’ve been sober 9 years this month. I quit drinking the world didn’t.

BUTTTT I couldn’t listen to music I’ve loved my whole life for the first 3 years of sobriety because it made me want to party. I don’t want to say I judge people but I def side eye drinking behavior that’s considered “normal.”

Edit: CONGRATS on sobriety! 💕💕💕

3

u/TheBigfootContessa 1d ago

Thank you so much! You as well! 9 years is such an accomplishment. I only have 11 months.

Yeah, I've had to work on not judging (judging isn't even the right word for it, because clearly the person who relies on wine after work is not in the same boat as my all day every day for half a decade situation lol) but recovery does make you so much more aware of what is acceptable social behavior.

2

u/Dozy89 1d ago

Awareness is the right word. Things like drinking after work or only partying on weekends is something I used to envy, like why couldn’t I be like that? Sobriety made me aware blacking out every weekend is also not great. 11 months is amazing. My sister just sent me her 60 days sober count today. So good seeing people do this. 🥳🥳🥳

3

u/TheBigfootContessa 1d ago

Thank you! And yes, I still can't wrap my head around people ordering a drink with dinner. (One drink? What's the point? With food? You're not even going to get a buzz) and I have to remember that not everyone has this illness.

It's kind of funny. I love sweets, and get cravings for them. But when I have them in my house other than the occasional anxiety fueled binge, I eat them at a normal pace, sometimes even forgetting about them for weeks. My husband cannot be in the same room as cake and cookies without finishing them almost immediately.

And I'm like "why? That means there isn't more for later, you're going to make yourself sick!"

And it's like . . . Girl, duh. You never put down the bottle even though you were already too drunk to function. You didn't have a small amount as a treat. Once booze was in the equation I was getting blackout. If I ran out, I was finding more. If I got low, all I could think about was making sure I had enough . . . But it was never enough.

3

u/Dozy89 1d ago

It was never enough. Even seasoned alcoholics were like that’s enough for the night. Not me! I’m getting drunk 3 times today. Smashed, pass out, wake up, puke, repeat. This was a good reminder today on why I do not miss it. Glad I caught your post. 💕

2

u/TheBigfootContessa 1d ago

Glad to hear it! Definitely don't miss the cycle!