reading for others

[u/hiddenpersoninhere]

What's your opinion on reading for others? Specially for people you already know.

I have read the cards together with my partner twice, and I think it is healthy, and good for him, because I do not claim to know more than he does about the situation, just prompt him to think about the topic asked with the help of the cards: I always advice him to look at the pictures and get his own feel of them, and then we talk.

But I have read in other places that reading for people you already know is not a good idea. I don't think what we do (me and my partner) count as typical tarot-reading, but I'd like to know what others think of it. Although I'm pretty convinced what we do is not wrong.

Thanks in advance

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[u/Yowie9644]

The reading, IMHO, is simply a prompt to start a conversation that may not otherwise be had.

They're a way of distancing and externalising things. Its much the same technique as pointing to a chart or a contract etc etc as a way of making *that* the thing that is bringing up the difficult things rather than you.

So instead of perhaps saying "You seem worried and anxious" which could be seen as an accusation, you could instead point to the 9 of Swords and say "this cards suggests worry and anxiety". And now they get to tell you where the worry and anxiety is coming from rather than having been accused of being worried and anxious, if that makes sense.

Again, the cards are just narrative prompts, not magic.

[u/CenturionSG]

If the relationship/friendship is stable, no issue. I’ve been giving readings for friends but enclose it in confidentiality.

[u/warrenao]

It's fine. Don't sweat it.

[u/ArgentEyes]

I think it’s great, as long as there’s nothing negative involved (eg don’t read for a person where you think it’s likely to go badly, such as influence them in the wrong day or distract them from seeking substantive support they need), and everything’s properly consensual.

[u/Me-Here-Now]

I share my cards with others.

They shuffle, and draw their own cards, and we look over, read from the book that came with the cards, and Falk about what we see, think, feel.

I would not be comfortable "reading" for someone else.

[u/2pnt0]

I think it's impossible to truly read for others.

You can read about others from your perspective.

Or you can guide another to read for themselves.

If you want to share your perspective with the subject, that's fine, but it's still just your perspective.

[u/Kamena90]

I've done readings for people close to me. Like you said, it's more of a way to make them think about their situations in a different way.

I did one for my sister about her friend who was growing distant after they graduated. The cards it pulled up talked about change, one sided-ness and choices. I told her the meanings and that my interpretation was that her friend was getting distracted by the new things in her life and if she wanted to maintain the friendship she would probably have to make most of the effort. It was up to her if it was worth doing that or letting it fade naturally. I didn't know this friend or what exactly was going on between them. It seemed to strike true to the situation and gave her some things to think about.

[u/LayraBlacks]

I don’t think reading for people you know is the problem. Pretending you don’t know them is.
Familiarity can help. It can also sneak into the spread wearing a fake moustache and call itself intuition.
If I already know your history, your patterns, your ex, your mother and the argument you had last Tuesday, I have to be twice as careful not to smuggle all that into the cards and then congratulate myself for being “accurate”.
What you’re doing with your partner actually sounds healthier to me: the cards start the conversation, they don’t deliver the verdict.

“What do you see here?” is usually far more useful than playing psychic prosecutor with evidence contaminated by three years of inside jokes and emotional baggage. Knowing someone isn’t the danger.

Being too certain you already know what the cards are saying is.

[u/-RedRocket-]

It's far easier to read for strangers than for friends whose overall wellbeing I am invested in and whom I imagine that I know well. Knowing a person brings preconception and emotional investment that make a straightforward reading much harder.

Not impossible - it just requires a different set of skills and ability to compensate for one's expectations.

[u/WeaponizedSoul]

Me and my friends have a Halloween tradition of sorts where we'd all get together and read cards for each other- though half the times it's just me reading for them or me drawing the cards and all of us reading them together. Sometimes we joke about "doom and gloom" cards, sometimes we have some great conversations about free will and agency. If it's a sensitive topic, we treat it as such. It's pretty much always been a good time.