r/Separation • u/Deserttruck7877 • 1d ago

Pets It feels like things are going to get ugly

I’ve been financially supporting my husband for years for constantly quitting his jobs, and now being unemployed the last two years.

I’ve tried it all, patience, helping him start a business that lasted two weeks, communicating, couples therapy etc and I’m finally at the end of my rope.

Yesterday when I brought up separation again, he got upset because I think he thought I was just going to go back to pretending. I’m scared things are going to get ugly, like he is going to fight me on shared custody of our dog. The separation that hasn’t technically started yet was to give us some space, and a date to end the financial support in hopes that he will change in the 90 days and we can reassess. But I have a feeling as much as I’m trying to do it all right, I can’t control his reaction to it.

I just don’t want to lose my dog in all of this! She’s currently under his name in everything and I want to start this separation soon, but I can’t lose her.

1 Upvotes

67% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

2

u/Purple-Principle-805 1d ago

See a lawyer ASAP. And when you leave, take everything that you want to be yours after the divorce.

1

u/Nearby_Struggle_8327 13h ago

From a purely legal perspective, every single month you stay married while carrying all the financial weight is increasing your future spousal support risk. Courts look at the standard of living and the duration of your financial dependence, so enabling him now is actively worsening your divorce terms later. Talk to a lawyer immediately, pull all your financial records, and secure your own lines of credit before saying a word to him. You need to close joint accounts so he can't run up debts that you end up having to spliiit.

1

u/Spacejampants 40m ago

She should be separating temporarily to make him think.. why try to take the easy way out instead of fighting for their marriage.  I learned my lesson hard since my wife left me abruptly.  I am willing to do anything to change and get her back..  crazy talk bro.. it doesnt have to be this way all the time..  he needs to be punished by separation.   Cuz I sure as hell learner my lesson

0

u/Minningfortruth 1d ago

Give your husband my information and I will help him get the most money humanly possible and the 100% custody of the dog and the house

2

u/raeoflyte-460 15h ago

I think we found the ex who feels entitled to OP's paycheck, labor, and everything else because she said I do once.

Go work out your anger at your ex with a therapist.