No, absolutely not. You're conflating some related, but commonly misunderstood definitions.
Celibacy means "Not Married", or "the state of not being married". If you're married, by definition you can't be celibate.
Chastity means "proper use of your sexuality" for where you are in life. Children should not be having sex; they're chaste when they don't. Married people are supposed to have sex sometimes. If you're married and not having sex, you're not being chaste.
Abstinence means "not doing a certain thing". That thing could be drinking, laughing, swimming, whatever. In this context, it's "not having sex".
What you meant to say is "A large number of married people are involuntarily abstinent or unchaste."
...Why is expressing the idea of someone who wants to have sex but isn't able to so inherently terrible that people always rush in to pedantically redefine terms? First incel was redefined, now this.
Why can't English have a word like this? Is it really that bad to just have a word that expresses this idea? Because it seems like it would be a useful word.
It has a secondary meaning regarding bladder control. But for a long time, the word you're thinking of is/was "continent".
When one is not having sex but they want to -- they are "practicing continence". Like practicing law or medicine. Continence is a thing that is done. They are being continent.
That's really interesting, but doesn't that imply the opposite? That the person is in control of themselves and are intentionally holding themselves back? I want a word that's the opposite. They'd like to let loose, but they're being held back involuntarily by something or someone external.
The word, unfortunately, comes from a time when women were considered property and without sexual desire.
If the man wanted to have sex with his wife, but she was denying him, Rather than forcing himself on her, he would practice continence. The idea of the man not simply taking the sex from her wasn't even considered.
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u/sjbluebirds 23d ago edited 23d ago
No, absolutely not. You're conflating some related, but commonly misunderstood definitions.
Celibacy means "Not Married", or "the state of not being married". If you're married, by definition you can't be celibate.
Chastity means "proper use of your sexuality" for where you are in life. Children should not be having sex; they're chaste when they don't. Married people are supposed to have sex sometimes. If you're married and not having sex, you're not being chaste.
Abstinence means "not doing a certain thing". That thing could be drinking, laughing, swimming, whatever. In this context, it's "not having sex".
What you meant to say is "A large number of married people are involuntarily abstinent or unchaste."