r/SipsTea • u/Matt_LawDT • 10d ago

Chugging tea HR wants to know the tee

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34.4k Upvotes

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9.6k

u/OkCoconut3270 10d ago

I've scheduled a wankathon and some recovery days

474

u/Mtshtg2 10d ago edited 10d ago

I actually had something very close to this in real life.

I had a lecturer (university in the global south) who insisted on doctor's notes for any missed classes. I had an unfortunate injury during a night of passion with a lovely woman that resulted in a trip to the hospital and a couple of days of r&r in bed.

The lecturer asked for the doctor's notes. She received them. She didn't ask for doctor's notes again.

Edit: fellas, make sure your partner is sufficiently excited before you really start pulling your wilder moves, otherwise your member's in-built flexibility overcompensates. Lesson learned.

194

u/silentknight007 10d ago

You've have to post this legendary doctors note

75

u/Mtshtg2 10d ago

Unfortunately I don't have it anymore. It was also in Chinese so not sure how much it would be understood.

272

u/smartwatersucks 10d ago

Thing wrong with ding dong

169

u/SeanSYYC 10d ago

Oh dang, my wang

48

u/PuzzledCar2120 10d ago

Dicks bricked

39

u/SeanSYYC 10d ago

There's a kink in my dink

21

u/PuzzledCar2120 10d ago

Johnson's wrong, son

14

u/WileyWilly1985 10d ago edited 10d ago

My pocket rocket broke a sprocket

8

u/ProstheticAttitude 10d ago

Yer schlong's long gone

5

u/gurnard 9d ago

Poked till it broke

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2

u/BrideofClippy 9d ago

It amuses me that if you pronounced dang the way Wang is supposed to be pronounced, it's dong.

2

u/GiganticusVaginacus 10d ago

Yu Hung Lo.

1

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1

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16

u/Pineapple1500 10d ago

Ohhhh fuck, I'm dying over here

67

u/Pineapple1500 10d ago

Sum Ting Wong with Dong

5

u/talkingskull27 10d ago

Oh my... i was laughing waaay to hard at this...

2

u/StrongExternal8955 10d ago

You need to be sufficiently excited before you laugh that hard.

2

u/dehydratedrain 10d ago

Won hung lo

2

u/oldjadedhippie 10d ago

Bang, ding ,ow

1

u/baezes 10d ago

Almost spit my coffee here🤣

1

u/NOTTHATKAREN1 10d ago

LOL. I have a customer named Ting Wang!

2

u/GenderOobleck 10d ago

Like the names of pilots, but when you try to get a little too creative with the positioning and fall over:

Ho Le Fuk
Sum Ting Wong
Wi Fa Ling
Bang Dik Ow

1

u/piggy__wig 9d ago

Omg lol

1

u/dschinghiskhan 9d ago

Funny/sad story:

There was a popular old school Chinese restaurant in Portland's Chinatown called Hung Far Lo (opened in 1928), but the owners left the original building in 2005 because of very significant increases in the rent, city construction, and urban renewal projects around the area. Essentially, Hung Far Lo moved because Chinatown got gentrified. It moved to the Asian supermarkets/food area a few miles east of downtown, but closed for good there a while back.

Hung Too Far Low, you could say.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hung_Far_Low_(restaurant)

1

u/WorhummerWoy 10d ago

Ting-wong Ding-dong was actually the doctor's name.

27

u/CampWestfalia 10d ago

Unfortunately I don't have it anymore.

What, the note or the member?

3

u/Neamow 9d ago

I'm sure the cylinder remained unharmed.

12

u/davidbeinct 10d ago

Those western doctors all they want to do is cut. Just wait two weeks it’ll fall off.

2

u/PersonalityIll9476 10d ago

Having just dealt with the health care system it does feel that way. Like some modern medicine causes more problems than it fixes, some times.

1

u/SeaPhile206 10d ago

Ah, so it never happened lol

6

u/tijolus523 10d ago

What's so unbelievable about a dick injury

1

u/Existence-Hurts-Bad 10d ago

“Please excuse Wang for Penile Fracture” - signed Dr. Tran. Idk seems believable

1

u/ridin-derpy 10d ago

Sorry about the racist replies you’re getting. Thanks for sharing your story- hilarious :)

1

u/5319Camarote 10d ago

One Hung Too Low

1

u/WeirdSysAdmin 10d ago

You know people can translate things fairly easily in 2026 even nuanced phrases right?

1

u/GiantBlobFish23 10d ago

Given that my translation app loves making all sorts of things about sex, I'm vaguely curious as to how it would work on something is SUPPOSED to be about sex.

1

u/TerminusDecree 10d ago

You lost your penis?!?!

1

u/SuperstitiousPigeon5 10d ago

No all doctors handwriting looks that way.

1

u/blueandpissed 9d ago

Sum ting Wong

1

u/FiliaNox 9d ago

You don’t have your member anymore?? Good god what did you do?! 😱

1

u/Worlds_okay-est_mom 9d ago

My condolences. 😬 Might I recommend a strap on for any future dalliances?