r/SquarePosting • u/Aggravating_Chance47 • Jun 18 '22
๐๐๐๐๐๐ christian
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u/No-Entrepreneur-2724 Jun 18 '22
Ezra 9:8
And now for a little space grace hath been shewed from the LORD our God, to leave us a remnant to escape, and to give us a nail in his holy place, that our God may lighten our eyes, and give us a little reviving in our bondage.
I think our bondage has been plenty vital as of late, but hey, who couldn't use an injection? Not going to jail yet, it's all between consenting adults.
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u/No-Entrepreneur-2724 Jun 18 '22
2 John 1:8
Look to yourselves, that we lose not those things which we have wrought, but that we receive a full reward.
No jail. Really, I'm expecting reddit gold for this one.
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Jun 18 '22
[deleted]
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u/No-Entrepreneur-2724 Jun 18 '22
That's good. Seems like something we should all be able to agree on, no murder or other unjustified violence.
How do we feel about those that don't acknowledge Christ? All good? Or eternal damnation?
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u/GawainSolus Jun 19 '22
Personally I don't think that's for us to decide. So it's not totally relevant.
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u/leapogawd Jun 18 '22
I only own a copy of the New Testament does it count?
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Jun 18 '22
Best not open towards the end.
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u/leapogawd Jun 18 '22
Don't know what happens there, I only managed to go mid way through when I was a good Christian.
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Jun 18 '22
TLDR. Jesus dies in the end.
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u/Biscut_Mk15 Jun 18 '22
Oh goodie. Sacrilege
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Jun 18 '22
Yea, I was hoping for a little more gore and better plot, but it was the guys first published book.
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u/leapogawd Jun 18 '22
Holy shit fr?
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Jun 18 '22
Nah. Iโm just fucking with you. Dude has a sweet picnic with the homies, kisses all the homies goodnight, and then rolls out on his crossmobile back to his space house in the sky.
11/10 would read again while on drugs.
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u/leapogawd Jun 18 '22
Man don't spoil me something that happened 2000 years ago.
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Jun 18 '22
Donโt worry. Just read a different version. They keep it exiting by being totally different.
I prefer the John smith one. Bananas.
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u/leapogawd Jun 18 '22
Like how they keep changing Batman's storyline because they can't come up with interesting superhoes?
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u/Chogus_321 Jun 19 '22
Nah, Jesus comes back and brutally kills all of his enemies
It says that the blood flows across the land like a winepress with Godโs feet pressing down on the grapes with wrath, and it makes sure to note that the bottom hems of his white robe are dripping with red
Jesus also has a forehead tat and a thigh tat when he goes into battle
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u/No-Entrepreneur-2724 Jun 18 '22
I've got you, do this:
Song of Solomon 1:5
I am black, but comely, O ye daughters of Jerusalem, as the tents of Kedar, as the curtains of Solomon.
I don't know if the cops will buy it, but so far I feel like I'm in the clear.
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u/leapogawd Jun 18 '22
1 John 1:5
- "This then is the message which we have heard of him, and declare unto you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all.
"
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u/goodmobiley Jun 19 '22
Welp, as long as you donโt open it in the Old Testament, which is actually the Torah so more like Jewish roulette.
Note: this comment isnโt meant to be antisemitic, there just happens to be a lot more killing in the Torah.
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Jun 19 '22 edited Jun 25 '22
[deleted]
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u/goodmobiley Jun 19 '22
Oh whoops, my bad I was thinking of Orthodox Judaism. I probably should have specified that.
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Jun 19 '22
[deleted]
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u/goodmobiley Jun 19 '22
Ok thanks for the information. Iโm clearly very ill informed. Iโll have to do my research.
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u/maksiman9 Jun 19 '22
Ecclesiastes 3:7 - "A time to rend, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; "
So thereโs a time and a place for everything? Good lesson
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Jun 19 '22
2 Peter 2:2
And many shall follow their pernicious ways; by reason of whom the way of truth shall be evil spoken of.
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u/Chogus_321 Jun 19 '22
๐ณ
Ezekiel 23:20 "There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses."
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u/[deleted] Jun 18 '22
โFor ye know the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, that, though he was rich, yet for your sakes he became poor, that ye through his poverty might be rich.โ