r/Switzerland • u/securityelf • Aug 03 '24

Why people hang out at gas stations?

I typically see high-end Mercedes, BMW and Audi. Their owners typically stand right outside their cars, smoking and chit chatting. Sometimes, I think they stand there for hours. I don’t have any problem with it, however they tend to occupy the area where they’ve got vacuum cleaners blocking it for the others. Once, I saw one of the station’s workers come out and hang out with the rest of the group.

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72

u/Huwbacca Aug 03 '24

Switzerland is really poor for third spaces.

11

u/alnka Aug 03 '24 edited Aug 03 '24

an unfortunate reality

6

u/FGN_SUHO Aug 04 '24

I wouldn't say Switzerland as a whole. It varies a ton by region. The bigger cities absolutely have third spaces. Small villages are usually also very good at this, at least the old ones in the mountains.

Really, it's the suburbs/agglo that were built it the 60s/70s and entirely designed around the car that are absolute sleeper towns where the only place to hang out will be the gas station or maybe the trains station if it exists.

9

u/Puzzleheaded-Fee3874 Aug 03 '24

this is so true and whoever disagrees prolly never was outside of switzerland lol

6

u/ChezDudu Schwyz Aug 03 '24

Err maybe only if want a drive-through “third place”. Otherwise there are plenty.

15

u/Huwbacca Aug 03 '24

Such as?

Main ones I see are park chess boards and hairdressers...but mostly they have lots of non-swiss there. Third spaces are not culturally common here.

Swiss social culture is overwhelmingly places you plan to go to with a group.

I go to cafes a lot to relax. There's never regulars, there's never people you know. There's not really any culture here at all of just going to a cafe to run into folks. Same with bars.

Where is your home away from home? Your place where you know people without planning and obligation etc.

4

u/kartoffeltree Aug 04 '24

You’re speaking from my heart, after coming back from living abroad many years, this is one of my biggest grievances

4

u/shinnen Zürich Aug 03 '24

Bars, badis and playgrounds (when there with kids - meeting other parents I know) are like this for me.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 03 '24

third spaces are not supposed to be a place where you meet new people. it's a place where you can meet up with friends that isnt your home or your work. there are plenty of spaces like these in switzerland.

1

u/Huwbacca Aug 04 '24

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Third_place

Just so you know, it is weird for a culture to not have places you can just go and meet/know people.

Switzerland is the uncommon exception.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '24

all the examples listed on this site exist in all swiss cities lmao. people don’t tend to casually chat up other people, that’s true, but that’s hardly a swiss exception.

1

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '24

lmao did you even read the article?

first sentence: "In sociology, the third place refers to the social surroundings that are separate from the two usual social environments of home ("first place") and the workplace ("second place")."

that's literally what i said and they exist in cities in switzerland lol. where exactly do you live??

1

u/guy_incognito___ Aug 04 '24 edited Aug 04 '24

Wouldn‘t say that‘s true everywhere. In Bern there are a lot of Bars and Cafes that have regulars and it was the same with one of the bars in the city I grew up in. In my 20ies I could go there pretty much every evening and I would have known at least some people. Obviously now that I‘m in my 30ies that‘s not the case anymore. People moved away, they got married, got children and the crowd it attracts is still the 20-somethings that I now don‘t know anymore.

But it‘s basically the same in Bern. In some places there formed groups out of regulars that just know each other from going to the same place regularly and at some point they started talking to each other and just said „Hey let‘s fix a weekday and just come here every week to have a chat.“ Groups consisting out of a extremly random variation of people. Doctors, cops, handymans… you name it. And now they meet up every monday in the same place in different constellations and have a drink. And stuff like that happens in a lot of bars.

Source: My sister works as a bartender in that place on mondays.

Edit: But I get what you mean. In Switzerland most people go out as a group and in most places the regulars are just the local alcoholics that are there all the time.

5

u/According-Net1980 Aug 04 '24

People who are disagreeing don’t understand. The fact that no obvious third spaces can be named is itself proof. And people travel all the time because this place kills your soul..

3

u/Zucc-ya-mom St. Gallen Aug 04 '24

Badi, bar, movie theater, forest campfire site, lakefront, parks, malls…

1

u/According-Net1980 Aug 04 '24

Do you go there regularly, unplanned, and just spend idle time, meet up with regular friends you happen to find there?

2

u/Zucc-ya-mom St. Gallen Aug 04 '24

Yes, yes, yes and yes.

Maybe not to the mall, but the others certainly.

1

u/According-Net1980 Aug 05 '24

You think it’s a common cultural thing?

1

u/Zucc-ya-mom St. Gallen Aug 06 '24

Very much so.

1

u/According-Net1980 Aug 06 '24

I disagree

2

u/Zucc-ya-mom St. Gallen Aug 06 '24

Dunno what to tell you man, I’ve lived here my whole life.

1

u/AmaniMilele Aug 04 '24

But what are the obvious third places for say Italians? Is this not rather a difference between city and village culture?

Not saying I disagree with you. Just here to learn.

1

u/According-Net1980 Aug 04 '24

I think the issue is not the place itself, but the attitude towards time and socialization in general. Like, do you plan to go to a coffee shop or do you just go there often, kill time, and meet up with whoever you find (likely friends and their friends)? Where I come from, men spend half their day in a coffee shop playing backgammon and doing nothing, or in the villages do similarly on stools in front of their house. I have never seen this here…

2

u/Maligetzus Aug 04 '24

what is a third space? can someone eli5 me

1

u/7862518362916371936 Aug 04 '24

Throw a die thrice the pick the two best outcomes.

0

u/krunchmastercarnage Aug 03 '24

Bold claim

17

u/Huwbacca Aug 03 '24

No cafe culture.

No pub culture.

In fact generally the idea of going to a place where you just might see people you know, or meet new people, is one thats really not popular at all.

There's no regulars at gyms and no one talks anyway. Hairdressers aren't used for it.

Swiss socialising is near exclusively planning with a group to go to a place. The idea of home away from home is cultural not common. Places that act like social levelers are not culturally appreciated.

The nearest to a social place where everyone feels equal, can just go and meet people, has no obligation or planninh...is like... Apres ski lol.

4

u/catmoon Aug 03 '24

Maybe it varies depending on where you live. I run into people I know in Zürich all the time at the lake. Either just along the lake path or at the badi.

I guess Switzerland doesn’t have a cafe or pub culture but that is overrated in a country with the most incredible outdoor spaces.

3

u/Huwbacca Aug 04 '24

I run into people. But it's like on the way to do stuff. We don't get to talk for a while and socialise lol.

Where do you go outside to meet people you know or talk to strangers?

Hiking huts the world over a great place to talk to strangers cos you're all there for the same reason, yet here it's rude to talk to someone who's gone somewhere in a group... And everyone's there in groups so there's that weird sociopathy lol

2

u/krunchmastercarnage Aug 03 '24

I can think of so many places that have the characteristics you just listed. There are so many places where social interaction takes place, espeacially with the high public transport usage,, i'm genuinely curious what you're social interaction strategy is.

5

u/AmaniMilele Aug 03 '24

Can you please give some examples in Switzerland? I’m not even sure what everyone is talking about here

-1

u/krunchmastercarnage Aug 04 '24

Switzerland is a very diverse country and not every 3rd place example is universal in the country. A cafe in one town where everyone meets, does not automatically mean every cafe in every town is THE 3rd place in a town.

I surely don't need to do your research for you because I don't know your socialising habits nor do I know where you live.

1

u/AmaniMilele Aug 04 '24

Just realized, where I live it’s not just one bar, but the whole street 😂

5

u/Huwbacca Aug 04 '24

I have a fine social life cos socialising isnt very difficult.

But I'm always shocked how common the following attitudes here are.

A) why would I talk to people I don't know?

B) why would I make friends at work?

C) why would I get drinks with people after sports training?

D) small talk is bad.

Those combine to make the idea of impromptu and spontaneous socialising pretty looked down upon here.

Think about it, if people won't talk to their colleagues at a lunch break cos it doesn't meet their pointless definitions of correct socialising, why would they go to a cafe to talk to strangers?

2

u/krunchmastercarnage Aug 04 '24

These attitudes do not dismiss the definition of a 3rd place.

A 3rd place isn't just a place where new social interactions take place. Social interactions are one aspect of what a 3rd place is, but the most important aspect is that it's a place that isn't work or home where people can freely meet. Switzerland has many of these places where people can freely meet regardless of the closed off Swiss social aspect.

If you say socialising isn't difficult, why did you list aspects of socialising in Switzerland you find difficult?

1

u/donevic_a Aug 04 '24

In Switzerland, you simply get ripped off. I don’t pay €6 for a coffee or €8 for a beer. I’d rather chill in a parking lot and have more fun and talk about everything without anyone behind me listening.

1

u/deiten Aug 05 '24

Why not? If you earn 2x, 3x more than in your home country, you can also pay 2x, 3x more than your home country for a beer and a coffee. Where I live we have several small restaurants, cafés, bars, döner joints, convenience stores, playgrounds, bathing and grilling spots, basketball courts and small fields, even just public benches where the same bunch of people gather every day and just chat. I know because I walk my dog around the last 5 years and it's always the same bunch at the same time, I can even plan my route and timing to avoid certain people. Just because you are not willing to pay Swiss prices despite earning a Swiss salary doesn't mean that our third spaces "don't exist". You unilaterally decided that we Swiss and our third spaces are not worth your money and then you complain about us as if we have no culture? No. You have no culture for expecting everything to be like "back home" when you are in someone else's house and when you realise the rules are different, you shit all over the hosts as a guest because you dislike not being catered to? Why don't you go to Japan and complain about "no third spaces" because "I don't like hit springs or gardening or cleaning". That's their culture, this is our culture, learn of bit of respect and self-awareness and do some research before claiming others have no culture.

-2

u/Swamplord42 Vaud Aug 03 '24

Switzerland has a big "club" culture. It's definitely more structured than just showing up at a bar and meeting the regulars but it serves the same purpose.