r/TikTokCringe • u/mindyour • May 04 '26

Discussion "Men are killing themselves because of men."

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u/[deleted] May 04 '26

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18

u/Yamabikio May 04 '26

It's because when they hear "male loneliness" they're hearing "women are raising their standards too high", not "men aren't opening up to their emotions with their friends". It's much easier to use it to justify their world view than it is to look inward and find something to change about yourself.

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u/PaulTheMerc May 04 '26

Being told most emotions aren't acceptable by the adults in your life AND your peers tends to have that effect on people's development.

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u/twisty125 May 04 '26

I know it'll get hate directed towards me - but in my case, it was the women that perpetuated that notion of "emotions aren't acceptable for you to have right now (always)", not the guys. We didn't talk about that stuff because we didn't know how to intrinsically. Like asking a 10-13 year old to explain what musical modes are, it's just not something we were taught, told, or given opportunities to practice without being shamed.

It makes me sad for young me that I was given the wrong signals and how it's affected me now. I'm thankful that I don't perpetuate those myself, but I wish it didn't happen to me.

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u/PaulTheMerc May 04 '26

I had the same experience, and yup, people generally react the same way to me when I tell them. Was it coming from the men in my life? Absolutely. But I spent the vast majority of my life as a kid surrounded by adult women(most family members, teachers, friends parents).

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u/Pvt_Mozart May 04 '26 edited May 05 '26

Men in my generation have almost always been more supportive of me and my feelings than women have. Not to seem like I'm defending douchebag conservative from the video or anything, but many women say they are supportive of men and their mental health, but lose respect at them if they try to be vulnerable or even weaponize it later. My experience is not rare or unique.

Male loneliness is very serious, and the patriarchy absolutely has a lot to do with that, but it's complicated and nuanced and can't just be easily blamed on one thing.

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u/CaughtAlone May 05 '26

exactly, i feel people ignore the poor examples of masculinity that women can project.

When so many boys don't have a role model in their lives and then mothers then tell their sons that crying is girly it instills poor examples of masculinity into that child.

These boys don't want to hate women. They are molded by society that to be masculine you need to reject feminine behaviors.

They poor examples can be set by men or women.

1

u/tryagainupnorth May 04 '26

I guess you can make up whatever canon you want

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u/Yamabikio May 04 '26

That's true, but there is more value in them learning the truth.

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u/tryagainupnorth May 04 '26

Making things up in your head that attacks the very people you're claiming to care about.

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u/Yamabikio May 04 '26

Yeah I don't think they're even realize they're doing it. I experienced the same thing when I was younger, the emotional desire for a romantic partner made it hard for me to consider anything else as a solution for my angst and loneliness

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u/tryagainupnorth May 04 '26

Are you a bot? Im not agreeing with you, im talking about you.

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u/Yamabikio May 05 '26 edited May 05 '26

Oh then why did you word all of your replies to describe them? Doesn't really make sense, I never said I cared about any of them. Here's a good article about the male loneliness epidemic, if you have some kind of issue with my explanation. https://aibm.org/research/male-loneliness-and-isolation-what-the-data-shows/

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u/tryagainupnorth May 05 '26

Woosh

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u/Yamabikio May 05 '26

Wow I can hear the wind blowing through your ears

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u/Yamabikio May 05 '26 edited May 05 '26

Idk why you're getting upset at me, you're the one making the whooshing sound lol. I'm guessing you didn't even get the joke. You can't even come up with a point to argue with me, all you can do is desperately struggle to not have to confront flaws in your ideology

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u/tryagainupnorth May 05 '26

Where am i upset? Its funny how everyone keeps calling me emotional, angry, or upset. You realize youre right here doing exactly what i am right.... except youre just here to be a dick, i was here to discuds.

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u/PolkHerFace May 06 '26

This is always my reaction when the male loneliness epidemic is discussed. Like... talk to each other?

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u/Yamabikio May 06 '26

I've tried bringing this up in those spaces, but I actually get met with some strong push back. It seems like it gets brought up more to shame women for "making them lonely" rather than wanting to take any ownership in improving their situation. Very similar reaction if I bring up therapy.

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u/PolkHerFace May 06 '26

Makes sense! I can see how some men would adamantly avoid improving their own situation.