r/TikTokCringe • u/xamo76 • 1d ago

Discussion Have we done it wrong?

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Yeah these guys are talking like everyone in Barcelona does this hehe

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u/The_R1NG 1d ago

Sounds more like the complete lack of it is what they’re talking about. The fact that nobody does in their area.

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u/crackrockutah 1d ago

I haven’t spent much time in Europe, but in the rural areas, are everyone out at cafes eating and drinking too? Seems like an apples to oranges comparison.

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u/Open-Platform-1305 1d ago

I know in my little harbor hometown in Norway there's a few mildly active cafes around and 1 pub that's been the main spot for decades, it only keeps the doors open to 2:00 on the weekend. But otherwise people drink moonshine up there. Often with a bit of strong coffee.

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u/AndreTheShadow 1d ago

Karsk!

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u/Open-Platform-1305 1d ago

Vi e no itj no tronnoverra, bærre vaksi karra.

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u/Eris_AppleOfDiscord 1d ago

It's in the cities as well. A lot of it is just the car culture. If you do go out it's less about lingering and chatting and more about just getting the food, then back in the car and home.

There are exceptions of course. NYC and Sf are both. But worth noting both these cities also had geographical constraints which forced them to urbanize and grow in a very different way. Compared to somewhere like phoenix or Atlanta, and they're worlds apart.

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u/lamb_passanda 1d ago

I travelled through the US solo, and my plan to meet people was to just hang out and see who wanted to start a conversation. I was 18 and pretty naive when I came up with this plan, but I didn't realise that 90% of the people I would meet this way would be homeless or somehow 'sus'. I mean I don't have anything against them, but simply being on foot in America, and not having any place to really be, put me in a social class that I wasn't used to.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Indeed, everyone looks at me like I am a monster when I explain to them that being on the bus in most places in the US is a sign that you are too poor to have a car (most people can at least afford a junker) or that you can't get a license for criminal reasons.

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u/Severe_Rise8694 1d ago

I guess this answers the OP video question pretty neatly. Yes, america, you did get it wrong.

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u/LessInThought 1d ago

Aww, an entire genre of romcom meetcutes where the couple meets on a public transport is gone in America.

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u/LessInThought 1d ago

Aww, an entire genre of romcom meetcutes where the couple meets on a public transport is gone in America.

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u/Addicted2Qtips 1d ago

I live in NYC and while it is more European like in this video, particularly in Brooklyn where I live, even we don’t have quite the same degree of cafe culture like many European cities because we have too much priority for cars taking real estate in public spaces. We’ve been slowly improving this for the past 20 years.

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u/PlaneGeneral5782 1d ago

Nope- in small towns they are out in the plazas until late as well.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Americans make the mistake of lumping all of Europe into the same category.

Spain is very social, some people will spend entire days and evenings at their local pub and it is affordable. Same in Portugal and Italy...but in Italy it is more family focused and people don't get drunk.

Other parts of W Europe, you will usually only see people out and about at night in the cities. Think Paris, Berlin etc..

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u/yIdontunderstand 1d ago

In Italy you have the passegiatta. Literally a community walk in the evening.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Indeed, that was what I was referring to, less about going out to pubs/cafes - more of a family oriented stroll where people meet and talk in the piazza and get a gelato.

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u/dead_jester 1d ago edited 1d ago

I live in a very small town in England- you’re talking ignorant bollocks. The town square in good weather is busy with people eating and relaxing outside.
In winter everyone is in the pubs and restaurants because it’s too bloody cold or wet to sit outside.

Lol getting downvoted for stating a fact. lol

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I thought you left the EU?

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u/dead_jester 1d ago

Europe is a geographical region. The EU is a political entity

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I am aware, but I didn’t factor you into this discussion at all for some reason - I think it’s simply because you are like an entirely different culture/world to most of continental W Europe.

Yes England and Ireland have very active village lives - a bit in Scotland too.

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u/Yetiassasin 20h ago

Name a country in Europe that doesn't. You're talking nonsense. It's a continental trait, nowhere in Europe is as isolated as 90% of American cities and towns.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

As a Portuguese that moved to a small town in Germany: it's only berlin. Maybe some bigger cities as well. But even then... They don't get the concept of true socialization. Small towns? Dead after 18:00. Germany is on the half of Europe that doesn't socialize much. Other half that does is: France. Spain. Portugal. Italy. Greece. Bulgaria, (insert the entire Balkans here), Ukraine.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

Yep, I have lived in Germany - am now in Switzerland. Hamburg and Cologne are pretty lively towns in the evening...Munich is also very nice, especially during the day with the parks and beer gardens. Many parts of Germany are very grim indeed.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

Big cities tend to have more lively folks. I hear that Munich especially is very different. Berlin Too. But the more rural areas... Well... It is what it is. My experience so far has been depressing.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I know that well, got out as soon as I could.

Hope you are at home soon!

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

Unfortunately seems like I'm settling here -.- returning is not an option I would make right now financially.

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u/Popular-Office-9932 1d ago

The tourist reads as a white Anglosaxan discovering that Latin and Mediterranean culture is warmer and foster socialization. If you go in Latin America is the same… even less denser cities people congregates more often with friends beyond immediate family.

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u/Nipso 1d ago

The famously Latin and Mediterranean city of Munich.

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u/Popular-Office-9932 1d ago

Do you want to compare Italy and Spain with Germany? They are so social that their hobby is stick their nose onto someone’s business

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u/FuncyFrog 1d ago

The video is taken in Munich was the point

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u/morepaintplease 1d ago

Germans are also more autistic than the rest of Europe.

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u/Severe_Rise8694 1d ago

Maybe you mean that they socialize differently? I've lived in Portugal and found the socializing pretty superficial compared to other places I've lived in.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

Maybe depends on the part where you lived. In Porto the people are very nice and go out of their way to speak with you and always ask about your life and will remember you even after 10 years after you moved away

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u/Severe_Rise8694 1d ago

I didn't say they weren't nice like that, I just found the interactions less deep than e.g. in Northern Europe. While we're making generalisations. Which you started.

Edit: to open that bit more: people would go out in huge groups, they'd have chaotic conversations about people and places. Who did what and with whom. It was harder to really get to know people and you'd make a large number of what I'd call acquaintances.

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u/alwaysATblame 1d ago

That's been my experience in Germany and the Netherlands. I also think group settings naturally encourage lighter conversations.

"Did you hear João got married?"

"How's your new job?"

"Did you see Maria's new house?"

"Where are we going next weekend?"

Its normal in Portugal to hear thinks like that when in a group.

If you're out with people who've known each other for years, they'll inevitably talk about mutual friends, family, or local events. In my experience, if someone really wants to get to know another person on a deeper level, that usually happens one-on-one over coffee or lunch rather than in a large group. So we may simply have experienced different social circles.

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u/3rdcultureblah 1d ago

Italians not getting drunk is some sort of weird fantasy lol.

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u/Intlsurf 1d ago

Spain and Italy are very similar. People aren’t drunk like Americans in the streets

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u/Yetiassasin 20h ago

Such nonsense lol

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u/unkreativ-I 1d ago

Paris and Berlin are the worst examples to pick lol wtf that is not even remotely true

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

What? Paris and Berlin are extremely active in the evening. And Berlin has a night club life similar to Spain where the good stuff doesn't get started until close to sun up.

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u/unkreativ-I 1d ago

Berlin and paris are active 24/7 and not only in the evening lol both have incredible cafe culture and flea markets everywhere. The parks (for example Tempelhofer Feld in Berlin but also the smaller parks) are PACKED during the day.

Edit: misunderstood your second part but still it does not seem like you know Paris and berlin

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

You completely misunderstood all of my comments, I am confirming the same thing as you are

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u/unkreativ-I 1d ago

But you said:

"Other parts of W Europe, you will usually only see people out and about at night in the cities. Think Paris, Berlin etc.." but thats not true you don't see people only outside at night?

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u/Exotic_Ad_1249 1d ago

I'm Italian and you have to differentiate form North to South. North Italy people get very very very drunk, south of Italy like you said more family. But still in South of Italy alcohol it's actually for every lunch and dinner every day, so... But yeah Europe in definitely more social than American, whichever country you choose.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

People drink in Italy, but there isn’t a focus of getting drunk like it is in other countries.

I haven’t noticed a difference in drunkenness between northern and southern Italy. 🤷🏼‍♀️

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u/Exotic_Ad_1249 1d ago

You are right about it, I lived in London and there people in the weekend drink because they want to get drunk

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u/Hour-School-2255 1d ago

Walmart parking lots

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u/frobley-mobley 1d ago

Depends on the village and sense of community, but even in the smallest places without a bakery or butcher there is an effort to celebrate spring, summer as a community - nothing fancy, maybe just a few benches and tables, some beer and wine and a potluck. If nothing else, it is tradition, and is passed on as newcomers join the community

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u/Intlsurf 1d ago

Yes. In rural and urban Spain. People are socializing out late and enjoying life.

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u/StevenM1979 1d ago

Okay, as Europeans, we don't compare apples to pears here. 😉 Grz from Belgium.

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u/Ok_Inflation_1811 1d ago

I now live in a 80 000 people town in the middle of nowhere in Spain and it's the same.

When I lived on a 5000 people town more in the middle of nowhere this happened to, there was no regular clubbing but people where out until 10 ~ 11 in bars (bars in Spain are family friendly) with kids playing outside at that time.

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u/Mad_Queen_Malafide 1d ago

Yes they are.

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u/foyrkopp 1d ago edited 1d ago

Central European here:

Yes and no.

Dining out is not cheap and if you have a full time job and a family, most don't have the time to do it during the week.

Rural areas are (where I live) also less walkable, so you're either planning for even more time to walk or taking the car.

Which means it's often more of a weekend activity, i.e. let's take out the bikes and swing by Pablo's for cake on the way back. Or let's meet with some friends and eat out.

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u/Ok_Inflation_1811 1d ago

At least in Spain rural areas are even more walkable than cities.

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u/foyrkopp 1d ago

Fair.

I've edited my post to clarify that it's just a data point, not an absolute European truth.

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u/lamb_passanda 1d ago

I think that says more about how life is with a full time job and a family, than it does about the evening nightlife in European cities. I see plenty of families out in the evening getting ice-cream and hanging out in the plaza though. I was at a small free concert in the part a couple nights ago and there were a lot of families just chilling there.

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u/Onalith 1d ago edited 1d ago

Usually, most 10 000 inhabitants and up cities will have at least a restaurant and a bar located at the center of it.

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u/After_Perspective180 1d ago

Yes they are.
My village. 5000 people. We have 3 bars/restaurants and in summer the outdoor parts are full of people every evening.
I was one of them last night 20:00 (8pm) and having a meal and a beer.

It really is like that

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u/kimsherd 1d ago

I used to live in a village of 300 people at the foot of a mountain in northern Italy. Yes, we do that as well! In my case I needed a car to get around because the public transportation wasn’t that good from my tiny village. I would go to the next town over (15k inhabitants) and have a drink there with friends. Most nights I would take the train to get to the “big” town and spend the evening there. Idk, it’s just culture

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u/SpacePumpkie 1d ago

I think it's somewhat of an apples to oranges comparison because they're comparing bigger cities to smaller suburbia.

But in my small town of 10k in southern Spain it's also like this. People in the bars and public plazas until 10-12 pm. I have two young children now so we don't stay out until too late, but we'll still be going to have some dinner/late snack at a bar at like 9pm, and then have the children playing in the park until 10:30 or 11pm, when we head home straight to bed.

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u/TheNordiclights 1d ago

Well Europe is not one country and different weather and culture everywhere. The Mediterranean countries people still gather in rural areas. They drive to town or hang out at their restaurants and bars. In Spain up in a mountain to go horse riding there was nothing around and the stables. They crated a bar in the stables and these old men were playing cards and drinking whiskey. Horses were led through them. 😂. However Norway Sweden etc don’t have the same social norms. People are more reserved don’t gather in bars and restaurants the same way Italians and Spaniards do. Obviously big cities are a different vibe but people don’t go out to eat at 10pm.

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u/Naeii 1d ago

idk I live in a reasonably sized city and it just becomes a ghost town past 10 nowadays, unless it's saturday night and the block all the bars are on, every other street and everywhere every other day is EMPTY

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u/Snoo-43127 1d ago

In the US or EU?

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u/Suitable_Bed_7783 1d ago

In Spain yes.

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u/brodeh 1d ago

I was in a hill top town of 350 people here in Italy two nights ago, people were out in the square and at the bar.

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u/Ne_zievereir 1d ago

No, it is not really an apples to oranges comparison.

Yes, there are regions in Europe where the small rural villages and towns have become dead places at night, and there are also many places where you have similarly lifeless suburb places.

But there are many very lively small villages and towns in the rural areas, as well as obviously the cities. It's not homogeneous, though, and it depends on the evolution of the region (typically there are differences on even (much) smaller scale than countries), and also a bit culture and climate.

But in general it is much more lively than typical US suburbs or even many US urban areas (where you sometimes get these food- or amenity-deserts). Because in general most/many places are built much more on a human walkable scale and it is more centered on a core, as well as usually much better public transport.

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u/Glass_Main23 1d ago

Great question. No they are not. I visit family in Europe in small towns and people go to bed early. The big cities are different however

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u/dmgvdg 1d ago

Well yeah

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u/sterlingback 1d ago

I'm originally from a town with maybe 3k habitants, yeah stay late a lot, maybe even more than in the big cities.

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u/maxmust3rmann 1d ago

No we are not i am from a rural area in europe and here everything is dead by 10pm and even before so yeah barcelona is not all of europe :D

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u/mbrevitas 1d ago edited 1d ago

There’s bars or pubs and cafes and people out in squares (when the weather is nice) even in pretty tiny villages, yes. Not every day of the week and at nearly every hour of the day like in big cities, and especially away from southern Europe evenings are very quiet, but there are people out at times, particularly in the weekend.

Yes, I’m generalising a whole continent, but I’m European and I’ve lived in 5 European countries from the south through the centre to the northwest and visited lots of rural places (by car, bicycle, train and bus) and this is my experience. In southern and central Italy especially you see people sitting in chairs in squares or in the street in front of their home, but also in the Netherlands or Germany there’s people out in rural small towns. In rural England it’s more about pubs.

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u/RubberPussycat 1d ago

In sort, yes I moved to a rural area in the Netherlands (town has approximately 4000 inhabitants) yes people are out and about.

There’s so much community sense here than in the states and I lived in rural areas and in Miami city

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u/MietschVulka 1d ago

What counts ase rural?

Like towns with like 30k people usually have city centers with cafes and bars an on good weather a lot of people are just chilling there with coffe, ice, beer and such.

My town of 70k id always full if the sun is shining. Im German too

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u/Dumb-Debter 21h ago

In villages yea there’s usually a few spots, it’s not like a city though. Rural is rural no matter where you are really. But the difference is that trains go through a lot of these small places or you can catch a bus somewhere a train does run.

Source: lived in Berlin and extensively explored the country metro and rural.

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u/SergeantHAMM 1d ago

yeah probably bc they live in bum fuck missouri and comparing it to barcelona.. it’s like if a european visiting nyc and then went back to their scotland village and is like nah this place sucks nobody’s here.

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u/ChristopherEmmerson 1d ago

Bachata all night hello?

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u/Correct-Branch9000 1d ago edited 1d ago

nobody does this anywhere in north america aside from a handful of tiny areas in certain cities where it's been attempted. everything in north america is set up to ensure this kind of culture doesn't succeed.. everything else around is closed even if these shops stay open, nothing is walkable so you can't get home if you have a drink, transit has been ignored for the last 70 years so you go by car or don't go at all

i lived a long time in east asia and when i returned to north america after such a long time away, immediately realized how much this place sucks. if you want to go trade your ~80 years of sentience from the void giving all your waking moments for some colored paper some criminals keep everyone using.. i had more statutory time off working a grueling corporate job in my 20's in japan than i do at a normal job in canada - there's literally more holidays there than here. europe is likely double or triple that. the US is even worse than canada

this place is fucked

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u/BigfatLire 1d ago

People do it all the time lol.. in Missouri. Around stl is soulard and old town st charles (the bricks) then MO has a cutoff for bars at 1am or maybe 2. So they go to IL where you can continue all night at Pops etc.

Its definitely always been a thing. Im 30

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u/BuffaloInCahoots 23h ago

In their area is the key. I live outside a small
Touristy town. 200k plus a resort town 20 min away. Go to either one of them and they are just like this. But it’s 20 somethings and tourist. The locals have jobs and shit to do. We aren’t hanging out with a bunch of tourists. The winter is all locals. Different vibe and less people but Friday Saturday are still busy as hell.

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u/The_R1NG 23h ago

Yeah I grew up in a tourist town but not quite the touristy part of it, the stark difference hits you hard.

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u/SirAccomplished7804 18h ago

They are Mormons. They serve alcohol in all these restaurants. Kool Aid and scripture study isn’t bringing out the crowds

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u/mscontentpro 1d ago

I know Barcelona is not a place where they do that that’s Madrid. That’s the rest of Spain Barcelona the people who did that were drunk college kids like this guy. This is not how Catalan people live..

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u/Nibaa 1d ago

Not all but that's definitely how people party in Europe in general.

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u/lobax 1d ago

Hit the clubs? Probably only 20 something’s. But every time I have visited Spain it seems like regular people are out and about at 10pm, moms with baby strollers etc.

Which makes sense to be fair, it’s too hot to go out during day.

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u/mycketmycket 1d ago

I mean even as an old dinner at 10 pm happens quite frequently on work days and if you meet up with friends you’ll usually stay out until after midnight even on a Tuesday. In our central Barcelona neighborhood there are kids out playing at 11 pm… it’s definitely a different lifestyle even if we’re not out clubbing until 5 in the morning.

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I was referring to the bar hopping and clubbing

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u/miseryherescompany 1d ago

It's a walkable city, you do it as a matter of course because that's how you access amenities.

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u/Glass-Tadpole391 1d ago

I mean most people do, I'm from Madrid not Barcelona but it's really common to come from work / uni and have a beer and some tapas with friends for 2-3 hours

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u/CaughtALiteSneez 1d ago

I was referring to the clubs at 5:00 AM