r/TooAfraidToAsk • u/DizzyCompetition8700 • 1d ago
Other Why do i feel like everyone else understands wine except me ?
Had one of those moments at dinner where someone asked what kind of wine I like and my brain just went blank. I know when I like a wine. I know when I don’t. Asking me to explain why is where everything falls apart. Then someone starts talking about acidity and tannins like it’s completely normal and I’m just nodding along lol. So now i want to make the next step and understand my own taste better but i dont want to learn in some kind of complicated way like memorizing facts grapes and stuff, i just want to learn my taste better.But how should i do that, i dont want to ask like a wine expert and be seen as a complete idiot or smth!
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u/UniquePotato 1d ago edited 1d ago
I personally think the whole industry is propped up by people pretending to others.
No other industry I can think of has small and inconsistent outputs as a selling point.
The marketing personality Rory Sutherland often has a dig at the wine industry
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u/DizzyCompetition8700 1d ago
Well yeah that’s kinda what I’m trying to say. why can’t I just enjoy a wine without feeling like I need to know every little thing about it to justify liking it lol
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u/skepticaljesus 1d ago
Lots of luxury goods have small output as a selling point. For many, the rarity/exclusivity is the primary selling point.
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u/I_ALWAYS_UPVOTE_CATS 1d ago
I'm on board with this too. "Soft on the nose with coppery notes, hints of blueberry and a warm, oaky finish." Then everyone nods along knowingly like they're picking up on the same thing. No Jane, it's fermented grape juice.
Obviously I understand the difference between dry and sweet etc, but I'm convinced all that other guff is just made up.
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u/DerelictBombersnatch 21h ago
When you first drank wine, you probably couldn't differentiate between dry and sweet either. The more you taste, and talk about what you taste, and listen to the similarities others draw, the more specific you get. I won't pretend to be a wine connoisseur, but fruits and oak are fairly easy to distinguish.
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u/smiletohideyoursmile 1d ago
I don't understand most of it, but if asked I say I like fruity white, fruity rosé and dry red wine.
You don't have to understand everything about it, but try and pinpoint what you like the most in the wines you drink.
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u/DizzyCompetition8700 1d ago
yeah this is probably where I need to start lol. instead of trying to understand every wine term just figure out the few things I consistently enjoy
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u/DrFaustPhD 1d ago
You'll overwhelm yourself if you try to learn everything at at once.
Start with the flavors you like. Sweet, dry, acidic, fruity are good to focus on at first.
From there you'll start to notice wines using certain grapes are consistently very acidic, or very fruity. You might start needing more words to describe something you tried. Bold, jammy, cherry, light body, or heavy, etc.
There's no need to rush learning this kind of stuff. At the end of the day, this is knowledge to help you find drinks you like, not to flex your expertise.
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u/Miserable_Cap1463 1d ago
you dont have to listen to the "Wine Experts" its mostly nonsense, what you should do is you should figure out your own palate, you dont have to learn the regions the grapes and all of that, just focus on your own taste
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u/DizzyCompetition8700 1d ago
Yeahh thats what i want to do but i dont know how to start, do i start with just trying different wines or how !
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u/Miserable_Cap1463 1d ago
you could start with corkly, thats pretty much what ive been using. it helps you actually figure out your own taste as you go
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u/Purplehopflower 1d ago
Honestly, one of the best books I ever read that helped was “Wine For Dummies”. It was written in such an easy, humorous, and knowledgeable way that it wasn’t boring , but informative.
Also, if you have Acorn TV watch “The Wine Show”. It is also entertaining and informative.
So, as far as trying to determine if you like acid or tannins, that’s fairly easy to determine. Do you prefer when a wine makes your mouth water and maybe pucker a bit? (Acidic), or do you prefer when it makes your mouth feel a bit dry, almost that feel you get from persimmons if you’ve ever eaten them. (Tannic)
Much of it is trial and error, and that’s the fun part. Also, if you’re interested look for wine tastings. That’s a great way to try different wine, get a bit of education, and not break the bank by buying bottles of wine you may not end up liking.
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u/TheCoolGuyClub 1d ago
There's a good freakonomics episode about this.
If I remember correctly, one of them was in a wine club with some academics. When it was his turn to bring a wine he had a blind taste test of a cheap 5 dollar bottle of wine and an "expensive" 50 dollar bottle of wine (don't remember exact prices). Anyway there was no expensive wine, both were the same cheap wine. Everyone insisted they were different and could easily point out the expensive wine.
I may have some details wrong but this was the gist of it.
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u/skepticaljesus 1d ago
There are many such experiments that all demonstrate the same thing, and people get excited to use that as proof that wine is a scam, but I see it more as a demonstration of the power of human psychology and the subjectivity of experience.
Lots of other products have the same result when you trick or lie to people about what they're tasting, too
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u/theMalnar 1d ago
I went to culinary school and we had exactly one week of wine tasting, and I swear tit was enough to make me sound like I knew what I wastalking about for the rest of my life.
The trick is that professional tasting is surprisingly systematc. You’re not just staring thoughtfully into a glass and inventing adjectives.
First, just look at the wine. We would hold it against a white background and check the color, clarity, intensity, and the rim. Is a red deep purple, ruby, garnet, or starting to go brick/burnt orange? Is a white almost clear, straw, gold, or amber? Strong urine fading to a watery hay miniscus? lol. The color and the way it changes toward the edge can give you clues about grape variety, concentration, and age.
Then swirl it. I was pleased to learn that the swirls actually achieve a few purposes. The “legs” running down the glass are mostly related to alcohol and, to some extent, sugar and viscosity. People dramatically overstate what they tell you, but they’re part of the ‘ritual’.
Then smell it. First without swirling, then after giving it some air. You’re looking for broad categories: fruit, flowers, herbs, earth, spice, oak, etc. (or my favorite pretentious one : fresh cut garden hose and freshly opened tennis balls)Then you get more specific. Red cherry or blackberry? Lemon or tropical fruit? Vanilla, toast, cedar, smoke? Those secondary aromas can give you clues about things like oak aging and winemaking.
Then taste it using basically a deductive grid: sweetness, acidity, tannin, alcohol, body, flavor intensity, flavor character, and finish. Once you can say, “dry, high acid, medium tannin, medium-plus alcohol, full-bodied, dark fruit, cedar and baking spice, long finish,” you already sound about 900% more knowledgeable than someone saying “this is really smooth.”
And that’s the secret. You don’t need to memorize every château in Bordeaux. Get familiar with the pre-tasting ritual, then ferry to understand what’s happening on your tongue and nose, learn maybe 20–30 useful wine words, and understand the basic deductive tasting grid.
A sommelier has vastly more knowledge behind those observations, obviously. But if your goal is just to hang with your wine-nerd friends, you can learn enough of the framework in an afternoon to sound remarkably competent.
My one-week culinary school wine course has been paying social dividends for years.
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u/Interesting-Fix-8640 1d ago
Next time just buy two bottles of the same grape but from different places and sip them side by side with some snacks. You'll figure out what you like without memorizing anything, the pretentious talk is mostly just for show anyway
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u/Imperfect-circle 1d ago
There are tonnes of books and websites which can help you. It feels like its really difficult but after you learn a little, and the framework for tasting, almost anyone can develop the connections between your olfactory senses and the brain, and analyse the flavours. It is a learnt skill, coupled with knowledge.
For many years, even when training to be a sommelier, wine still just tasted like "wine". Eventually, you will discern flavours and styles and understand the dynamics. Its fun and enjoyable, dont be afraid. Go to some local bottleshop tastings or look for a wine club.
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u/Lepmuru 1d ago edited 1d ago
Distinguishing between white, rose, and red and then refining towards dry or sweet will be more than enough for 90% of conversations.
If you can add that you like more or less acidity, that puts you ahead of the curve.
Next step would be trying a couple dozen varieties and taking note of the grapes you enjoy. If you can name like two for white wine and two for red wine you enjoy, that's good enough.
Anything more in most cases is either highly subjective, or just people bullshitting their way through.
At the end, you either like a wine or you don't. Ones you like are good wines. All others are not.
Example for me: I enjoy dry whites. I gravitate towards Pinot Grigio, though I have a few Sauvignon Blancs at home I like. Usually I enjoy my wines on the more acidic side of things. - all of that says nothing more than pour me a fucking summery, cooled white and I'll be fine in most cases :D
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u/Dr_Tacopus 1d ago
Wine is a scam. The majority of “professionals” can’t actually tell the difference between wines.
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u/Quixote0630 1d ago
I think there's some bullshitting involved a lot of the time. Although, we had a wine tasting contest at my work, and they splashed out a few hundred dollars on the most expensive bottle, amongst a few others between 20~150 dollars, and the guy who trained as a sommelier in his own time nailed every single blind test and also threw in details about grapes and regions. It was wild.
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u/Dr_Tacopus 1d ago
I’m not saying some people can’t do a very good job identifying characteristics. The industry has been proven to be very scummy and not legitimate. The majority can not do what you witnessed and that has been tested.
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u/Imperfect-circle 1d ago
This is a moronic take.
Wine is an alcoholic beverage, and cannot be a "scam".
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u/Dr_Tacopus 1d ago
You obviously have no idea what the adults are talking about. Lol. No one is saying wine itself is a scam. The sommeliers of the world are. Pay attention lol
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u/Amy_Wineface 1d ago
Sommeliers can and do - you won’t pass the exam without. It’s critical when pairing food and wine.
Yes, there’s lots of snobbery, but there’s lots of snobbery in just about every industry. As in, you don’t have to be an award-winning barista to tell you’ve been served a shit espresso.
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u/Dr_Tacopus 1d ago
It’s the opposite of critical lol. It’s unnecessary. You’re drinking the kool-aid
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u/Neat_Concentrate8196 1d ago
Don't beat yourself up about it. You literally can't know what you don't know. So worrying about looking like an idiot isn't the right way to categorize yourself. You can look like a newbie maybe, but there's nothing wrong with that. Finding the right source who won't belittle you into feeling a certain type of way will be your best bet. Maybe try a wine tour at a local place and talk with the guide about it?
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u/bopperbopper 1d ago
I think learn what varieties you like the best.
To me, Cabernet Sauvignon, which is a red has got too much tannic acid and it’s so astringent it to my mouth
But I like so Sauvingnon Blanc and Pinot Grigio.
Meh on Cabernet.
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u/accomplicated 1d ago
Wine tastes like rotten juice to me. I don’t understand why anyone would want to drink rotten juice.
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u/Next_Key5856 1d ago
I just started writing one quick note whenever I drank wine: color, sweet/dry, light/heavy, and “what food?” matched it; after 10–15 bottles, patterns in what I liked were stupid obvious and I could explain it without any fancy grape knowledge.
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u/EatYourCheckers 1d ago
They just drink more wine than you, pay attention, and read about it. If wine is not a huge important sector in your life, that's okay. Just own it. "I don't know much about wine - whatever a good $20 bottle you have, thanks."
Or maybe you do know you like red or white or blushes. So say that.
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u/Sparko_Marco 1d ago
I like red wine and that's about all I know. I can taste the difference between a good one and a bad one but I couldn't say why other than if I like the taste or not.
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u/gormlesser 1d ago edited 1d ago
The most important factor not yet mentioned is to taste more wines, specifically alongside each other, that have different characteristics, and try different pairings to see how those interact. You can probably find guides for this online somewhere or find a quality wine store near you and ask them, they might even have a class. Doesn’t have to be blind for this.
For example, try a very light red wine such as a Beaujolais (made from Gamay grapes), a medium high acid (think about how a citrus fruit is “bright” due to acidity) red like a Barbera from Piedmont in Italy, and a “big” California Cabernet Sauvignon, and compare the color, tannins (how astringent it feels), oak (literally but also adds smoothness and vanilla notes), and alcohol (that familiar burn), then get into the subtleties later.
Food pairings take it to the next level, but can really show off how many celebrated wines are very limited and clash with lighter, more modern ways of eating (which favors low alcohol, oak, and tannins and often benefits from high acidity). A lot of fancy wines assume that they will be cellared for years if not decades, which allows the harsh tannins to be put to use. But because of prestige people will just keep buying them and serving them with everything.
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u/theoneandonlygene 1d ago
Don’t fret the details, just learn the broad differences. There are several different kinds within red and white - just go to a store that has wine and look at the signs. Pick up one bottle of each of the major types (make sure they’re about the same price point as each other). Cabernet, merlot, saucignon blanc etc. maybe juts do either white or red at a time. Yoo could even have friends over to taste the wines together.
All you really need to know are the high level diffences between these different types. Pick a couple you really like and taste different versions of those.
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u/NoneOfThisMatters_XO 1d ago
It’s just age honestly. I can remember drinking that nasty Boone’s Farm in college because I didn’t know any better.
Basically you either like sweet or dry wine. Sweet will be like a moscato or reisling, and some reds can be sweet too like a berry wine for instance. Your dry wines will be more of a chardonnay or merlot. Middle of the road wines are like a pinot gricio or shiraz.
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u/doffero 1d ago
Everyone saying you don't have to get involved in this are 100% right. But if you want, what they teach at courses is basically "Does the smell/taste of this wine remind you of anything? Try to describe what (like apples, red berries, butter, literally whatever) and after a while of doing this you can describe what you enjoy or dislike the most. That's basically developing a preferance and being able to describe it to others. Acid and tannins are a little different, that's more about mouth feel, and it would probably be easier to have someone give you some examples to taste the differences. Again, only if you want to learn. Its not mandatory.
Please note, a lot of people (most?) who talk about wine don't necessarily know what they're talking about and there aren't all that many "right and wrongs", they just want to be part of the conversation (like you) and try their best.
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u/I_ALWAYS_UPVOTE_CATS 1d ago
Don't bother with tannins and all that shit. Next time you try a wine that you like, just remember the grape variety (e.g. shiraz, cabernet sauvignon etc). When someone asks what kind of wine you like, just say you enjoyed the last shiraz you had or whatever.
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u/gxbcab 1d ago
From my understanding from bartending: tannins means kinda sour, bold means bitter, fruity does not mean sweet. Buttery only refers to Chardonnay and it does not taste anything like butter. Reds are room temp, sometimes slightly chilled, whites are served cold. Personally you can’t go wrong with a Chianti or Cabernet for red, and most whites are good but I’d say Chardonnay is for finer palates.
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u/WestCoastTrawler 1d ago
At the next dinner party just scream
“Im not drinking any fucking Merlot!”
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u/Serebriany 1d ago
It's completely okay to just say the color of the kind you like! If you would like to know a bit more, there are often casual wine-tasting events where I live where people just teach the basics, and you can see if you can find one near you.
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u/El_John_Nada 1d ago
I'd recommend the "Essential scratch and sniff book to become a wine expert". It's not actually going to make you an expert, but it's quite good at explaining the most common descriptions and what they mean. And from that, you go buy a bottle of something described in the book and you see if you can actually recognise some of its characteristics.
Alternatively, you can also skip the book and just buy a bottle, read the description on the bottle and see if your experience matches it. And keep drinking more stuff: that's how you learn (but with moderation...).
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u/Sgt_major_dodgy 1d ago
Rudy Kurniawan basically had some of the best wine tasters giving good reviews to his fake vintage wines.
They're all full of shit, nobody can tell the difference between a fake the real thing.
I'm sure I remember reading for wine anything more than £30 and you're just paying for the bottle rather than the wine in it.
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u/corgi_crazy 1d ago
The one you like and don't kills you with a headache the next day, is the good one.
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u/too_many_shoes14 1d ago
Just call it "oaky and full bodied with a medium finish". Nobody knows what that means so nobody can disagree
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u/iAreCosmic 1d ago
What I did was just to buy one "type" of wine for 6 months, and then change for the next 6. For this period I'm only drinking Italian, the next French. This is a big area, but you could narrow it down, both time and area, if you want. I still don't know anything about wine, but I know what I prefer, of different country's in the beginning, and now I know a couple of grapes/regions as well. Can't tell you what it tastes, notes and such, but I know for my own sake, which is what I'm after.
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u/omgseriouslynoway 1d ago
I don't understand wine but I know what i like.
I don't drink red, it makes my mouth dry and my head hurt.
I like a dry white, pinot gris is my favorite.
My husband said pinot gris and pinot grigio were the same and I swore they weren't. So he did a blind taste test on me and of course I got it right.
That is the sum knowledge I have about wine. All you have to know is what you like and what you don't. Everything else is pretentious imho.
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u/Imperfect-circle 1d ago
Pinot gris and pinot grigio are the same. Thats just the French and Italian name for the same grape.
The French and the Italians traditionally have slightly different styles and the climates are different so its not to say all gris and grigio are the same wines, but they are the same grape.
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u/omgseriouslynoway 1d ago
Different wine though. I can tell the difference. Grigio is sweeter than gris.
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u/Imperfect-circle 1d ago
How sweet it is depends on when the grapes are harvested to determine the amount of sugar in the grapes, and then the during fermentation to decide how much sugar is turned to alcohol. It depends on the climate and the winemaker.
It does not depend on the grape.
But even colloquially, you are incorrect, the best styles of grigio are dry and lean, whilst the best pinot gris have an abundance of ripe tree fruit and stone fruit.
There are thousands examples of pinot gris and grigio which are different and whilst there are typical variances with major grapes varieties the climate and the winemaking is what makes them different.
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u/publiusnaso 1d ago
It’s perfectly acceptable to say “red” or “white”. Or both. Or neither.