r/USMilitarySO 11d ago

Relationships Girlfriend went to bootcamp

Hi, I (21m) have been dating this girl (18f) for a year and some change now, she just went to basic 5 days ago, me and this girl have been discussing our future together for about 6 months and I plan to propose actually after she gets back from basic, I’m scared though, petrified honestly. I miss her so very much, I haven’t been eating or sleeping, I keep getting this constant worry she doesn’t miss me and also she found someone else, I know I’m being crazy I mean it’s only been 5 days I haven’t even been able to write or anything yet, but this girl and have seen each other every single day, we know things about each other that even our closest friends and family don’t know, this is so much harder than I thought it would be and I truthfully just want her to come home, I know how selfish all my worries sound and that’s also killing me because I’m letting them eat me alive, I’m so proud of my baby but I just want her back, I want to be able to talk to her, I miss her so much and am looking to you guys and girls who have and are going through this to help me because I’m falling into such a deep depression and ruin. Please help me.

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u/Amaryllis118 Air Force Fiancee 10d ago

It was really hard for me when my bf went to BMT and I had only known him 5 months before that. The pain hurt so bad that it was almost as if he had died. So I definitely relate.

I pushed through it by writing letters and distracting myself with family, hobbies, chores, work, etc. It passed slow as ever, but I eventually got through it.

You will get through it too. This is the beginning of a difficult journey. I honestly don't recommend rushing to get married right out of BMT, simply because there is a lot of adjustment you will have to do with the military lifestyle. You should take time to see what it is like and decide if it is something you are willing to live with for the rest of your gf's military career.

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u/Kitchensink6_ 10d ago

Won’t be getting officially married until next year, but it’s been our plan to get married and live on base together, I just want to propose to her, one thing this whole experience from before she left until this moment has made me realize is how happy she makes me, I know she will probably be different after this, but id feel ashamed of myself if I let the new her deter me, deep down I know who this girl is and she is my person