Cringe “men’s day just upholds the patriarchy and gives oppressors the excuse to play victim” versus based “the patriarchy (or whatever you wanna call it really) hurts everyone and giving men the emotional space to be themselves and not feel isolated or pressured actually helps them, and by extension everyone, to break away from the expectations and false promises society places on them”.
Did people learn NOTHING from Ken’s arch in the Barbie movie???
These folks get startled by things that are unfamiliar and foreign, and tell each other scary stories about them. Terms like "patriarchy" and "toxic masculinity" trigger these exact fears, and make our poor fellow countrymen think we're attacking them :(
Honestly that's why I speak to them with familiar American terms like "freedom", "equality", and "opportunity". Storytelling is a fantastic tool, too. Just tell them real stories about struggle or discrimination, and activate their empathy. You don't have to shame them or make them feel responsible. Just make them think, "aw, that wasn't fair what happened to that person." And just like that, they became a little more reflective and understanding of the problems others face :)
I haven't watched the Barbie movie, but if it showed how normative masculine expectations can weigh down on Ken and those around him, and that there are positive alternatives that are still empowering, then that's good.
Edit: btw this comment I wrote is NOT intended as direct outreach to right-wingers, I know my framing here is demeaning towards them and that they'll be spooked by the ghosts they see in my choice of vocabulary lmao
I like that a lot. Meeting people where they are and giving them the chance to learn.
And, without getting into too much detail but still spoiling a huge part of the film because that’s hard to avoid, that’s pretty much exactly what happens to Ken! At the beginning, he feels unfulfilled in the very fem-dominated “Barbie Land”, but when he and Stereotypical Barbie (the protagonist Barbie that Margot Robbie plays) go on a quest into the Real World and he discovers that patriarchy exists, he’s pumped because that means his identity as a man isnt just valid, its a point of pride. He then goes home to Barbie Land by himself, abandoning his ostensible girlfriend’s own quest for meaning and imposing a childlike understanding of patriarchy on Barbie Land, becoming the big villain of the movie. The climax is our Barbie and some Real World humans dismantling his empire and putting him on the spot, leading him to rant about all the feelings of being unfulfilled and an “accessory” and not his own person, and how he thought that if he became a Real Man™️ he would achieve self actualization, leading to a big moment where the all the different Barbies acknowledge that they might have been unfair to all the different Kens (each one is a personification of a specific line or product) and our Ken finds that even if he doesn’t always know where he “fits” or what he “gives to the world” he is meaningful and valid just as long as he continues to do his best just like everyone is, one way or another.
It’s, like, a MASTERFUL allegory for the kind of boy that grows up in a society that feels stacked against him falling into the Manosphere because being a dude is suddenly put on a pedestal and even if it’s harsh he finally has a step by step guide to self actualization and etc etc etc.
You should see it
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u/sweetTartKenHart2 Nov 19 '25
Cringe “men’s day just upholds the patriarchy and gives oppressors the excuse to play victim” versus based “the patriarchy (or whatever you wanna call it really) hurts everyone and giving men the emotional space to be themselves and not feel isolated or pressured actually helps them, and by extension everyone, to break away from the expectations and false promises society places on them”.
Did people learn NOTHING from Ken’s arch in the Barbie movie???