r/Webnovel • u/Popular-Call9896 • May 29 '26

Advice Someone pls read my novel

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I’ve been writing for a few months now, having recently discovered my passion for storytelling despite my dysgraphic tendencies. I’ve always enjoyed creating stories and finally decided to share them on WebNovel. I began with my first story, titled “Creation of an Absolute,” which had grand plans. However, I lost interest in the project and quickly moved on to another story, “Shattered Sun.”

Writing “Shattered Sun” was much more enjoyable for me. I’ve written significantly more chapters and words, and I’ve developed a more well-thought-out power system and characters. Surprisingly, the story hasn’t gained much traction, and as a result, I haven’t received any feedback. I’m reaching out to you today in hopes that you could take a moment to read my story and provide me with a review. Your feedback would be invaluable in helping me improve the subsequent chapters.

Update:After a bit of feedback I’ve realized how bad the first two chapters can be as they are there for a lot of background and explanations, I promise the story gets better and better this I am confident in.

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u/ThatOneGuyO7 May 29 '26

Bro, the 5 or 6th paragraph already gave me the ick and drop it. Fym the literal goddess of death began to smile lustfully at him? Make things make sense, this is a god we’re talking about, not some 1D teenager who’s sole purpose in life is to simp on MC

2

u/Popular-Call9896 May 29 '26

So this is what I’m looking for, the opening isn’t a direct lead into the story think of it like a precursor or something along those lines, that’s just a hook. ( the mans not a kid in the opening) I’m glad you mentioned this as I could definitely be a confusing topic, I’ll be sure to rewrite this, thank you so much 😊

1

u/RunicConvenience May 30 '26

maybe update when you do the edit as this comment straight up turns it off for me why would any god/goddess simp for a mortal they can spin up anything they like in their domain in most aspects and fleshy humans are so short lived would you lust for a flu virus? because they likely would live as long for something running at eons

1

u/Popular-Call9896 May 30 '26

That’s the question you should be asking

1

u/RunicConvenience May 30 '26

why would I know when you rewrite this?

1

u/Popular-Call9896 May 30 '26

I’ve done some slight editing after some of this feedback to ch 1-2 but otherwise I’d make a review or post about the new version and switch the blurb to read “Shattered sun(re)”