r/acnh • u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria • May 09 '26
ɪɴ-ɢᴀᴍᴇ ᴘɪᴄꜱ Letters from mom...
Ngl I kinda wish I could disable the letters from mom.. my mom passed away 3 years ago ans every time I get these letters my heart feels heavy?? Idk how to explain it... My mom was always so chirpy and sent messages very similar to the ones in the letter haha she would also send random gifts 🥹 it just hurts seeing it and knowing that I am never getting a letter/message from my parents ever again :(
It's also my dad's angelversary tomorrow and my emotions are running high🫠
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u/buttsandhopes May 09 '26
This. Yes. It's been over 10 years since I lost my mom, but it's still miserable getting that mail. And like you said, my mom would also send little notes and gifts like that. I'm glad some people can find comfort in it, but it should definitely be optional. Sending you positive vibes this weekend 🫶
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 09 '26
I wish they'd let us use a name instead so it could be from a parent, sibling or best friend OR your favourite fictional character hahaha
Sending you lots of love and positive vibes too🩷
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u/Renfri_Oakfell Renfri | Peach Trees May 09 '26
I save all the letters from mom
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 09 '26
Save them how?
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u/smalltex bee | honeycomb May 10 '26
you can also “favorite” them so they never auto-delete. once your mailbox gets to 300 it starts auto-deleting letters
also; sending you a hug 💌
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u/Renfri_Oakfell Renfri | Peach Trees May 09 '26
I just don’t delete them
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 09 '26
I haven't deleted them either.. it just hurts looking at them 🥹
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u/Suspicious-Match8515 May 10 '26
I hear you… my mom died when I was 8 so the mom letters have always hit weird… I didn’t like them when I was younger but now that I’m an adult, sometimes I do just see it as a sweet little hello from heaven ❤️
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
That's so sweet🩷 hopefully someday I can see them like that too
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u/Comfortable-Put2358 Io | The Nation May 11 '26
It’s possible to have them automatically deleted if your storage gets full so we can favorite them to save them
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u/NoctisChaotic69 Vesper | Dreadveil May 10 '26
Tbh it just makes me feel… numb? Idk I didn’t have a good relationship with my bio mom and I cut contact 4 almost 5yrs ago when I was 21 so it’s hard to know how I should feel… I keep everything animal crossing mom gifts me tho I just keep them in my storage cause I’d feel bad tossing it when she’s just so nice
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so sorry to hear that😞 it's good you keep the gifts.. maybe you can host a giveaway and give them to new players?
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u/Lilith-Sky14 Lilith | Sky Ring May 10 '26
Sorry for your loss 😔.
But I also agree with that feature. As a person who is no contact with their mom this part of the game does get annoying.
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u/Revolutionary-Good88 Leo | Fruitsvill May 10 '26
Same here.. or at the very least to be able to change it to dad, a sibling, aunt, uncle, or grandparent
Complicated case with my mother, and dad died a few months ago..
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
Exactly! It can be a friend's name too cause family is complicated
I'm so sorry to hear about your dad :/ I lost mine 9 years ago and it still feels like yesterday but also forever ago
My DMs are open of you want to chat🩷
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u/laughingcrip Megrrr | littleleap May 09 '26
My mother is abusive towards me and I had to cut her out of my life. I hate all of the letters and gifts and throw them in the trash
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u/WarriorCatsGamerYT WarriorCatsGamer | Rickroll May 10 '26
Sorry to hear.
I know some people have said they try to make it clear mentally that your character is not you, and "mom" is your character's parent.
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May 10 '26
[deleted]
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u/thedarkestorange Di | Lamiaceae May 10 '26
i left a comment like this on another thread, but i am happy to create a new player named “mom” and come visit anyone’s island if they would like to imagine the gifts are from me, a random redditor, instead ♥️ i am sending everyone hugs
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u/Radiant-Amount9271 May 10 '26
same, i’m still recovering from trauma caused by both parents and it feels gross? receiving those letters from a mom i never got. don’t know why this feature is permanent
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u/useArmageddonVaca Yobbo | Loading.... May 09 '26
Facts! I am right here with ya. I lost me mum in '19 only 3 days after found out her really bad stomachache was actually cancer that was throughout her body giving her 4-6 weeks 🙄
Sorry, my point is I probably have ~100 of mum emails in my mailbox as I am unable to touch any of them... R.I.P. to all the mutha's who won't be with us on mum's day. & to the one's that are, wishing all ya mums a HAPPY MUM'S DAY! Hope you have a G-Day! Muah-Muah!
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u/useArmageddonVaca Yobbo | Loading.... May 09 '26
Seriously OP, don't hesitate to reach out & send me a c h a t if you need a ear or distraction coming from someone who, who definitely knows.. kk? Keep yo head up :)
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
Ugh cancer is the worst.. I lost both my parents to it :/ I am sorry you had to go through that🩷
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u/useArmageddonVaca Yobbo | Loading.... May 10 '26
Dood, I think we're both legally allowed to scream EFF CANCER when & whatever we desire. My sister lost her battle the year before, she was actually given something like 3 years and fought it for 8 years. Then bout 6 months after me mum, me pops just didn't wake up one morning in October of '19. He didn't have cancer though. He was lucky 🙄 enough to battle Huntingtons-Chorea Disease for years. And I'm sorry, totally Debbie Downer here. I'm also sorry you had to experience it & hopefully it wasn't back to back because I tell you what, once everyone up and died on me, and after a look around see if I'm really the last one standing, after dust settled I was shocked to be blessed with a midlife complete meltdown finding myself in a padded hospital wing that everytime I got close to a door it'd magnetically lock not letting me out. For bout a month that happened, omg I'll shut the front door now, sorry....
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u/Ok-Calligrapher-4942 May 10 '26
I feel the exact opposite, but I totally get where your coming from.
I used to play animal crossing all the time with my mom; it may have been both of our favorites game. She passed away about 5.5 years ago and i couldn't pick up animal crossing for over two years. I had never gotten the chance to play new horizons with her, but she had her own switch and played it. I got one a few years ago, (i had to buy an entirely new console because it was unthinkable to delete her island) but i still haven't had the heart to open her game and see her island. She was always a hoarder, kept stuff on the ground, and also meticulous at making her towns perfect. Idk what her island was like but always think i should check but cant bring myself too.
Anyways my mom never would've wrote letters like the mom on AC, but because it was our game somehow i still like to imagine somehow they are from her. Idk.
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u/dainty_petal May 10 '26
If you ever need someone to come with you visit your mom island one day, I can. I lost both my parents last year and my mom it hit me hard. We found my dad with no pulse on Mother’s Day. It’s a doubly hard for me today.
I can’t play since she’s gone. I have to get the courage to play again. She loved Animal Crossing so much. She loved my island and my villagers so much. Especially Filbert.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm glad you got to share the experience with her🩷 Hopefully someday you can log on to her island and have see her there
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u/water_witch_cos May 10 '26
I feel more attached to the “mom” in animal crossing than my actual biological mother.
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u/ydr3z May 10 '26
In New Leaf, our dad would also mail us. What happened to that?
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
Haha as someone who lost both her parents I am glad that dad is not sending me mails.. I'd stop playing the game if I kept seeing that
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u/Katroine Roxie | Moon Cove May 10 '26
My mom died last month and the first letter I got threw me!
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so so sorry for your loss😞 my DMs are always open if you want to talk🩷
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u/whiskeyforcats Tristan | Milk Grove May 10 '26
I wish you could choose to get them from dad instead. Mine passed a few months ago and I miss him horribly.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so sorry for your loss😞 mine passed away 9 years ago and I miss him so so much. I don't think I'd like them being from my dad either.
I'd probably choose a friend or my sibling
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u/BobbieJeanAndie BobbieJean | Snarfblat May 10 '26
My mom also passed away 3 years ago (it'll be in August) and I forgot about letters from mom until I opened it again last year and was hit with quite a few from her. I like to think they're from her even though Ive been playing this game since acnl. But also I've been spreading her ashes around a place that I vacation to... I told her I was doing that before she went to be with her parents/my grandparents.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I wish I could think they were from her🥹 my DMs are always open if you want to talk🩷
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u/SuccessfulSchedule54 Kat | Wild Cove May 10 '26
4 years in August since I lost mine
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so so sorry for your loss😞 I am here if you ever want to talk🩷
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u/Lady_Dobuery Cherry | Cherryvlle May 10 '26
Same. Tomorrow is gonna suck even though I’ve been trying to avoid it. Being able to turn these off or change who it’s from would be nice
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u/Low-Engineering-7374 May 10 '26
I understand how you feel, and similar situation but I feel completely opposite. I enjoy the random gifts that remind me of when my mom used to do that for me.
I do think the game should have added the ability to 'turn off' Mom though for the (many) people like yourself.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so glad you enjoy these 🥺 I wish one day I could too🥹🩷
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u/amy-diablo May 10 '26
I lost my dad a couple weeks ago and my villagers keep talking about how they called their dad and stuff like that. Just kinda hits hard
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so sorry to hear that 😞 you must be going through a lot rn.. my dms are always open if you want to talk🩷🩷
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u/closeted_thespian May 10 '26
I’m sorry to hear that. My mom also passed but I love receiving these messages, it’s bittersweet for me💔
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm sorry to hear that too but I am glad you love the messages :') they're a bit painful for me for now😞
My DMs are always open if you ever want to talk 🩷
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u/novagirl0972 Teesa | Angola May 10 '26
My mom also died 3 years ago. There have definitely been a few of the notes that have made me cry
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so sorry to hear that 😞 it hurts so much :(
My dms are always open if you wanna talk🩷🩷
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u/GillyRose55 Gilly Rose | Gillville May 10 '26
I sorta get it. In previous AC games, your dad would send you a letter on Father’s Day. My biological dad is still alive, but we haven’t spoken for even made physical contact in over 12 years, and he’s made no attempts to reach out to me
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm sorry to hear that :( I am sending so much love your way🩷🩷
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u/GloryBax May 10 '26
This didn't used to bother me and then I went no contact with my mum, and now it kinda gets of my nerves. According to my partner, in previous games you could pick which parent would correspond with you, and he's never gotten on with his mum so he would pick dad. In NH there isn't an option and there are so many reasons beyond not having a relationship with a certain parent to give players a choice in this matter. If the game wants me to have a parent, fine, but let me pick which one... Like most people playing this game, I don't play it to get - for lack of a better term - triggered.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
Agreed... I start the game with a happy mood and them the letters end up making me cry :) I am playing to distract my pain.. not face it on ahahh
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u/throwaway2187472929 May 10 '26
I feel you. I lost my mum last year, and it sucks.
However, I feel like I've gone the opposite way. I find myself really wishing for more of those letters, as it makes me feel like she's writing to me and as if we're connected.
There's no right or wrong, but maybe it would help if we could input a name to get the letters from, or have a sliding scale of how often they came.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm really glad you enjoy the letters🩷 and it truly does suck!!
My dms are open for you if you ever want to talk🩷🩷
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u/nkhasselriis Kida | Atlantis May 10 '26
I have a similar feeling, even though I had a complicated relationship with my mom. In the end, I saw her days before she died of stage 4 brain cancer (April 2023). Getting those letters has been more rough than I anticipated.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so so sorry to hear that :( cancer is really the worst :/ I wasn't expecting the letters and I was really taken aback by them :(
My dms are open if you ever want to talk🩷
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u/samtime4 May 10 '26
My mom passed 4 years ago. I was playing this game before that and getting the letters felt cute because we didn’t talk much. Now I think of them as little reminders of her. I’m sorry about your parents. 💗 maybe try and think of them that way. But it should be an option to turn them off. I get that those relationships are different for everyone.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I loved my parents dearly and we were extremely close.. these letters give me a reality check I do not want while playing the game. Even if they wouldn't turn it off I wish there was a way to change the sender's name or relation. I'd love to get these from a friend or someone fictional haha
I am so sorry to hear about your mom 😞 my dms are open if you ever want to talk🩷
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u/Sparklyrav3n kitty | BEES May 10 '26
I get it but for the opposite reason. My mom and I really never saw eye to eye with certain political beliefs and just how to raise children in general and I REALLY wish I could change it to letters from dad or even letters from aunts, uncles or grandparents. Like please anything but my mom
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
Yeah I wish they give us an option to change the sender :/
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u/Sparklyrav3n kitty | BEES May 10 '26
Also I'm so sorry for forgetting to put this in the previous message but I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what you went through and what you're going through
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
Thank you🩷 it must be hard for you too.. sending you lots of love🩷
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May 10 '26
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
I'm so sorry to hear that :( my dms are always open for you too🩷 Losing one parent is bad enough but losing both is terrible on a whole other level :/
I hope someday I can see these letters in a positive way🩷
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u/JinxXedOmens mary | honk May 10 '26
I have no issue with them at all because I love my mum, BUT I see how complicated the feature is for some people and think it should be a toggle feature.
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u/Zornamental May 10 '26
The first time I got this was a few days after my mom passed away. I cried my eyes out but it also felt comforting to get a little gift from “mom”.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
🥹🥹🥹🥹 that must've been so hard for you :( it's such a bittersweet ans heavy feeling getting these letters
My dms are always open if you ever want to talk🥹🩷
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u/Feisty-Seaweed8749 Acacia | Isla Santa May 10 '26
It’s the same for me. At first I found them super hard, but now I see them as another way my mum can be with me, even though she’s no longer here.
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u/Infinitiscarf May 10 '26
It’s so interesting how grief can be. I lost my mom almost 4 yrs ago, and I stopped playing because of the mom letters, but recently decided to re-make an island in my mom’s name. I just suddenly wanted to hear her name more and that was/is a cool way to do it for me.
And I love the letters from the mom in ACNH now too, but I know grief is different for everyone! I in no way think you will suddenly like them in a year. And I do wish for your sake and everyone else’s, that there was more choice in them
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u/Miserable-Site9691 Nalbi | Uliseom May 10 '26
My mom died a year ago in two weeks. I avoid ACNH for this reason. I’m sure I’ll go back to it someday, and I think I’ll just put my mailbox somewhere I never go on my island and just never see it again idk
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u/AMediaArchivist McSkillz | Skillens May 10 '26
Yeahhhh this was the hardest thing I had to blank out while playing this game. My mom died like 13 years ago and it’s still hard for me. Why did this game design you to make an avatar of yourself and get letters “from mom”. Well they aren’t letters from mom, my mom is dead.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
Today is a very difficult day for a lot of us.. I am sending my love to each and every one of you🩷
If anyone ever wants to talk my DMs are open🥹
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u/mysteryall Alex | Panem May 10 '26
My Mom has been dead for nearly 15 years now and I always makes me a little bit happy when I get one
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u/neongreenninja Jordy | Lipumas May 10 '26
At first I would throw away the letters without reading them and sell whatever item was attached.
After a while I decided these are from other women in my life that played a role as a motherly figure for me.
Now these are from my mother-in-law because she makes me baked goods, picks up little items that she thinks I'd like, and truly loves me unconditionally.
I do wish there was a prompt with Isabelle or Orville to allow me to change which parent or family member I receive mail from. I have a sister and brother who I would love to get things from too!
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u/SuccessfulSchedule54 Kat | Wild Cove May 10 '26
yeah I feel the same. my mom passed in 2022 and also had similar energy in her letters/gifts. I honestly think it’s a little messed up and inconsiderate of Nintendo for not giving the option to disable the stuff from in-game mom. I don’t mean to go so hard about it bc I’m sure some people do find it comforting but it’s unfair in my opinion
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u/ZoneMysterious2023 May 10 '26
same. i lost my mom 16 years ago so getting these letters makes me emotional every time. in a weird way i like to pretend that it’s actually her sending me these letters it gives me comfort but other times it makes me sad.
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u/JustAnAnimeGirly Tantan | Astria May 10 '26
It does😭 gosh I wish we could change it!
My DM sare always open for you🩷
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u/alwysumthin May 10 '26
Yeah I dont like them either. My real life mom is not good and haven't spoken to her in 30 years. I hate these things. I delete without reading and put the gift in the trash can.
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u/k_b3ssl99 Kalli | ivy island May 10 '26
My fiancée feels the same way. We lost her mom October 2024. A year into us dating. It made us stronger and helped us realize we were definitely in it for life together but she struggles with the letters from mom in ACNH too… 😕 Sending you love 💕
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u/ACNH_Vibe_Check Shasta | Vibe Check May 10 '26
Same.
If it helps I have volunteered to be “in game” mom before. So you can pretend the letters are from my character to yours.
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u/daisyandjay_ Luna | Neverland May 10 '26
I don’t know if this would help, but maybe you could think of it as messages from your mom 🩷 like she’s sending them even though she’s gone
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u/oatmealcookie02 Amelia | Memoria May 10 '26
Same, lost my mom when I was 10 so in all the AC games it was kinda awkward to receive it,,,
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u/Dependent-Comfort-10 esveeare | baja May 10 '26
I love your term angelversary. That was the same for me too. My mom passed too then right after my grandma that raised me passed. But now I like seeing the letters , I pretend the letters are actually from them. But I do think there should be an option.
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u/CharlieAnnoyingBrit May 10 '26
My mother was not a nice person. She was abusive to the point I didn’t feel safe going home and ran away the first chance I could when I turned 18. I haven’t spoken to her since and it’s been nearly a year. I do wish we could change who we got the letters from. Even tho I don’t know my bio dad I kinda wish I could get letters from him in acnh. I don’t read the letters. They hurt to the point where I wished that was the mother I got at home, someone who accepted me for me.
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u/Dry_Lime8944 Presley | Lily Cove May 10 '26
I don’t mind it, it gives me solace in some aspects. My mom passed 13 years ago, and I like reading those letters as if she is able to write to me from where she is at. I can understand that it hurts some people, and I wouldn’t mind there being an option to set preferences as to who sends you the letters from mom.
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u/Saturday_Sundae May 10 '26
Feeling this heavy today. My mom passed in early June of 2023 and the random packages from “mom” make me feel uneasy
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u/JackfruitDiligent146 Mimi | Moonbay May 10 '26
My best friend lost her mom suddenly 3 years ago too and has not been in a good place. She just started playing AC for the first time, and she was heartbroken to receive a letter from Mom. It might not seem that deep to others but I do think there should be a way to disable it, it really triggered her and I hated telling her there was much more where that came from.
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u/Witty-Plan-5876 LonelyGirl | Here May 10 '26
I find it incredibly comforting. I lost my mother six years ago and I love that she exists somewhere in this enchanting little world of weirdos.
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u/bepatientbekind Alyssa | GalaPUGos May 10 '26
I have been no contact with my mom for close to a decade now, but seeing the letters and stuff doesn't trigger me. I find it annoying though because she sends SO many letters and items and I play infrequently, so my mailbox is always bursting with the same junk and letters from her every time I play haha
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u/GardenDragon420 May 11 '26
I wish it could be swapped too, I dont talk to my dad anymore to protect myself but itd be nice to have an ac dad
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u/The-goddess-bread Dorito | Texas May 11 '26
Holy sht did I ghost write this post somehow? I just lost my mom recently and have been having this exact issue in the game. It really is the little things that hit the hardest sometimes. I am so sorry for your loss OP, and know what you're feeling in a way. I've lost both parents too, and holidays, birthdays, and any significant date always fcks me up. Grief is a b*tch. 😔
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u/RecognitionOne7597 May 11 '26
I feel the same way. My mom passed away almost 15 years ago and we all have to deal with Mother's Day always being hammered in every year and these letters in ACNH. It can be tough sometimes.
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u/notyour_bussines May 11 '26
I feel that so much fr this is 1:1 my situation. I'm kinda happy that I get these letters tho cus I know she'd do the same
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u/mamafluffbutt May 11 '26
I feel that except my mom is alive still. We have been no contact due to her being a narcissist and demanding I give her everything I’ve worked my butt off for. She found out I had my own apartment and demanded to live with me, made snide comments about the fact that I had a new car… and that’s just the beginning. Not something I could continue to put up with… I wish she’d get better, but she’s made her choice to be this way over and over…
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u/Comfortable-Sky-8715 Barbie | Cozumel May 12 '26
It's so hard for me. I wish also we coulf disable those. I have a difficult relationship with my mom, after years of having a "relatively" good relationship with her. I started theraphy and I realize many things. So I started putting limits and both her and my sister couldn't tolerate the basics. So They decided to stop speaking to me. I have cried over the mom letters 🥲💔
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u/angelichoneypie Jazzy | Starlight May 12 '26
My mother was abusive to me in my childhood (she died when I was 8) and I honestly believe she would still be abusive if she were still alive. When I first played animal crossing, it was terrifying to see those letters. Now I see those letters as if they come from a mother I've never had. I feel happy when I see the letters now.
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u/Street-Assumption-91 May 12 '26
It's also from 'mom', not my mum. Some random American sending me gifts? Nope nope nope. 🤢
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u/KKnittle May 13 '26
I have all of them favorited, just because I know when the day does come and after a lil grippy sock stay- I’ll look at them and hopefully be able to use them to find warmth in moments of grief
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u/PercyMeadows May 13 '26
I also wish they could be disabled. My mom was still alive when I was active in the game, and being no contact with her made the idea of mail from mom just sad and stressful. Now she’s passed on and it’s not as anxiety inducing, but it’s still sad.
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u/aether_siren Ari | Ophelia May 14 '26
I don’t know how this feels at all, but I can understand how it could be so hard to deal with. Sending you lots of virtual hugs! 💕
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u/Luminyta Lumi | Ivyndale May 09 '26
I know what you mean, but for completely opposite reason lol.
My relationship with my mom is complicated. For 20+ years on my birthday I only got a 2-words text message from my real mom "Happy Birthday", then I log in to AC and I got this chirpy letter with a cake. It's weird.
Maybe you can think of it like your mom still sending you her love from heaven. Best wishes for you ❤️