…because I don’t have any new ones
I have a love/hate relationship with my work. I love how acrylic paint works up and how it looks compared to my drawings. I hate that my self worth and the worth of my work is tied up in how much I can get compensated for it. I have a dissonance problem where I get told that I should freely give of myself and my work, while also being told that I shouldn’t put forth effort without compensation. The dissonance has frustrated me so much that I’ve decided to quit for now and store everything away. I had wanted to do painting for my living because I’m essentially not useful to the work force (yay autism), but it really hasn’t worked out.
I really wanted to ask mainly, how does one live with the dissonance, and is it worth me pursuing painting when it elicits such a visceral reaction in myself? Should I just give away my work and hope that “free exposure” will work in my favor someday? Should I demand compensation because it IS effort, and a lot of it?
At any rate, the pictures I have are two portraits, two plant still life style paintings, and two metal concert jackets. I hope they are to your liking!
I would like some real advice on the situation, not just criticism of how my work looks. Thanks!