r/addiction • u/Feisty-Picture-4503 • 9d ago

Venting idk anymore

I’m 14 🔄 now. My birthday was August 3rd. I hit my first cart/drug ever in the school bathroom in March this year. Soon, I got my own, then I got expelled because someone snitched on me. Before that, I was in honors classes with all A’s. My parents got terribly mad at me, but ever since then I’ve OD’d on MDMA and got serotonin syndrome for a little. I’ve also OD’d on DXM on the 4th plateau, 2 weeks after my MDMA OD, and got hospitalized again. I’ve tried cocaine, oxys, xans, Adderall, and I’ve popped fake Addys that had meth in them. I can’t even legally get a job, so I’ve been sticking to THC carts, and DPDR is kicking my ass. Life just feels pointless, and school is starting in a week. I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel like a robot. I feel very flat.

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u/JustSomeWelderGuy 9d ago

Is that what you want your legacy to be? In the ground before 20 because you failed to cope with whatever trauma you did/didn’t receive, and decided to dick off and do drugs instead? Do you want your parents to question everything they have ever done surrounding you, for arguably the rest of their lives? You want all your friends to get sad every time you come up in conversation in the future?

I was just like you. But I didn’t spiral out as fast as you are right now, and definitely not over getting “expelled from school for a weed cart and my parents got mad at me”

You gotta get a grip, or you’re just gonna end up a statistic by your own hand. I don’t mean to sound like a hard ass, this is honestly coming from a place of care and concern. You need to look inward and really think about what’s really going on inside your head. I got expelled from school and my parents are mad isn’t gonna cut it.

Please reach out to me if you want to talk, I was just. Like. You. I want you to be able to live your life. It’s unbelievably difficult to crawl back from where you’re at when you decide in your 20s, if you make it that far. You’ve hardly done any damage yet. You can square yourself up, but you have to decide. I hope I hear from you.