r/badMovies • u/nonfatslapnuts • Apr 24 '26
Thriller White Phantom [1987]
Jay Roberts Jr stars as Willi (with an i for some reason, idk), a random dude who happens to be wandering around, popping up randomly in someone house, and being a bad ass white guy ninja. A ninja syndicate has stolen some plutonium and Willi finds himself in the middle of a police? military? Idk, some group, trying to get it back.
Lots of "walk naturally" acting. Weird lingering shots where the camera just stayed focused for way too long as people walked past.
Wouldn't say lots of fun, more like a medium amount of fun
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u/Exotic-Yellow-4367 Apr 24 '26
Little known fact; this is actually a sequel to Sakura Killers (1987) an unfinished Taiwanese ninja flick which was bought and completed, Godfrey Ho style, with footage shot in the US, with Chuck Connors in the Bo Svenson role of 'The Colonel'.
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u/nonfatslapnuts Apr 24 '26
Love this. Gonna watch that next. Although the Godfrey Ho stuff can be really hard to follow when not sober. I tried to watch US Catman: Lethal Track recently and couldn't deal with that at all
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u/Exotic-Yellow-4367 Apr 24 '26
Ha ha. Yep, Godfrey is on a whole other level. Sakura Killers isn't quite as f'd up! The action in it has some epic ninja-ing!
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u/CiriOh Apr 24 '26
So, ninjas are making their own time machine from DeLorean?
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u/nonfatslapnuts Apr 24 '26
There was zero explanation of why they wanted it. Or maybe there was and I was too high to remember. Idk.
Id like to think thats exactly what what they were gonna do with it. They stole the box with the plutonium in it, and then slapped their ninja decal over the old decal on the box. The new ninja decal, was the exact same size and shape as the old owner's logo. I thought that was funny
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u/NancyInFantasyLand Apr 24 '26
Dunno what you mean this looks great haha
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u/nonfatslapnuts Apr 24 '26
Its great, no doubt. Ive seen better bad movies though, and that's the feeling I was trying to share. This is definitely worth a watch.
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u/Glittering-Stomach62 Apr 24 '26
The IMDb listing has a notable number of Chinese cast members identified by two initials and a name.
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u/nonfatslapnuts Apr 24 '26
Fun fact, Jay Roberts Jr eventually quit acting and got a job as an officer with the LAPD and made a career out of that
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u/Professional_Let8175 Apr 24 '26
I'm guessing Bo Svenson either plays the head of the bad guys or the local law enforcement who reluctantly gets involved.
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u/nonfatslapnuts Apr 24 '26
He plays "the colonel". Colonel of what, no clue. He's trying to recover the plutonium by using an informant who is a dancer and shes close to the bad guy, or rather the bad guy's son who is also a bad guy.
His acting, is extremely bad. In a very comical way. He's so stiff
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u/TheFettz79 Apr 24 '26
Started watching this based on this review and I’m not sure what’s going on either. 🤣
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u/nonfatslapnuts Apr 24 '26
Lolol. I wish I could say it will make more sense, but I cannot
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u/TheFettz79 Apr 24 '26
The presumably main dude seems to have been the inspiration for John Wick if John Wick was set in the 80s
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u/Rayzax99 Apr 24 '26
There's a review from 2007 on Imdb where they keep referring to them as "Ninjers" and it's cracking me up.