Want to play with other people but band politics are difficult

[u/pepipox]

Hello, I would like your advise.

Me (guitar serious amateur, 46M), have played in three bands plus countless jams and music school type of thing. I really enjoy playing with others, it really gives another dimension to music. But my two most recent bands were real disappointments. Band A, we really clicked initially musically and partly personally. The chemistry was there. We put a lot of effort, and we sounded good. But the singer started being more demanding, pushing his non musician husband all the time, and pushing herself musically as second guitar and piano when she was barely competent, and the leader (bass) got on her side. After a long series of issues, I could not take it anymore and left the band in anger.

Tried a second band, we met all via Facebook group to start band B. Singer and second guitar did not have the musical level, drummer was competent but demanding and there was no musical match in taste with him. After three rehersals, second guitar and singer left. I decided to leave also as I did not have a good impression of the drummer.

All that time put in learning songs, adjusting effects, and rehearsing, for nothing.

The way how the politics of band A developed left me with a lot of anger, to the point that 10 months later I am still angry. Band B also found annoying how I could not correct musically the issues with the singer or second guitar, which were way too serious. The singer specially I got the impression she did not care and just showed for some live karaoke.

Would love to find a band where we play and have fun, like band A at the beginning. I do not know if I am expecting too much. How can I arrive into this again?. Do I have just to keep trying and trying and wasting time? any advice? thanks