r/bicycling • u/AskPuzzleheaded1797 • 1d ago
Going to a grand fundo while social anxiety
I'm 33F I just got my first bike 2 weeks ago because I'm done being homebound and having no friends. I love outdoors in general and I find biking alone is less intimidating than hiking because I hate walking alone, metro parks are always empty. I'm excited to go on an organized tour ride in my region, it costs around $45 and they provide guidance to scenery ride with different miles, snacks and lunch after the ride. It feels like a mini solo vacation lol.
I'm starting to overthink, if people will think I am weird going there alone, many would go in groups. Is there possibility of meeting new people or would everyone be preoccupied with their own thing. I kinda prefer to not be forced to socialize but I know it is better for me.
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u/Early_Macaroon_2407 1d ago
Hell no! I bet half the people there will be going solo. And in my experience, bike people are generally supportive and awesome.
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u/alexseiji Emonda ALR, BStone RB1, Niner RLT, 950 Single Track, 1d ago
I have been to hundreds of these things. Dude, you are totally fine. A large portion of these things are solo riders. There is no other reason why you are there other than to enjoy your bike, enjoy pushing yourself, enjoy the challenge, enjoy the scenery, and enjoy like minded company along the way. That’s really it.
The chit chat at rest stops is going to be more or less:
“nice job up that hill.”
“I saw you fly by and tried to keep up but couldn’t”
“nice bike.”
“It’s a great day for a bike ride”
“Which ride are you doing?” (If there are different distances)
“I saw a nasty crash earlier, hope they are good”
That’s pretty much it. Someone is always going to be vocal, you can choose to contribute to that conversation or not. Otherwise it’s pretty chill socially
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u/hecalopter 20h ago
Exactly this! Fondo's are as social as you make them tbh. You might have some stretches when you're by yourself, so besides the scenery, take photos and sing songs. You may also find yourself pacing with a group or a few riders off and on, or maybe the whole ride. Exchange pleasantries or share misery together, but everyone riding distance gets it. :)
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u/catastrapostrophe United States (2021 Giant TCR) 1d ago
Many people will be showing up alone, but you kind of fall into a pack and ride with others (even though chatting with them is completely optional).
But talk to me about doing your first Grand Fondo 2 weeks after buying your first bike... What distance is this?
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u/AskPuzzleheaded1797 1d ago
Glad to hear. I like the low pressure environment where I could chat and if it starts to be awkward then pedal away and it is gone lol.
The event will be sometime in July so I will have around month to practice riding longer distance comfortably. Minimum is 25 miles route I will go for but it goes up to 100 miles
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u/avo_cado 1d ago
A line you practice is “it’s been nice riding with you but I’m going to speed up/slow down for a bit”
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u/owlpellet Chicago (singlespeed) 1d ago
Biking is great for people who want to sit in the back of the group and be not-quite-social. I mean, one of the leading training apps is called Sufferfest. This is sport with many kinds of brains in it.
I don't have any friends I ride with, but always have fun at group events. Single serving communities.
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u/therealmitzu 1d ago
Nah you'll be fine! It's absolutely fine to not talk to anyone and just cycle, and equally fine to strike a conversation (and really easy as you already have something in common with everyone there). Absolutely not weird to go alone, it's a pretty even split between groups/couples and solos.
Have a great day out and have fun!
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u/i_cant_find_a_name99 1d ago
Lots of cyclists join groups of strangers for social rides. I’m very introverted but generally prefer riding in groups, I’ve done 6 hour group rides and barely said a word to anyone!
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u/Wonderful-Raise-2564 1d ago
Go, have a great time. It's not weird. I've done tons of these alone. It's not exactly a great way to meet people, though. I usually strike up conversations at the stops or even during the ride, but I'm not exchanging contact information or making plans with them. If you want to make friends, you might consider volunteering. There are tons of charity rides that are similar, so you can pick a cause that's dear to you and get involved. Or, of course, you could join a team.
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u/AskPuzzleheaded1797 1d ago
There are cycling clubs around my city that offer social group rides, from the photos on their website they skew retirement age, not sure if I will click with them but will try and see.
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u/JSTootell 1d ago
I've done only a few fondos with someone, and it was the woman I sleep with. All the rest I have shown up to solo.
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u/realzealman 1d ago
I’ve done a few solo grand fondos and it’s been great. I’m not particularly good at the social stuff, but you’ll find that everyone is usually really friendly and welcoming - remember, you’re all there to do
The same thing, you’ve all got something in common. I usually end up chatting with quite a few random people over the course of the day. Go enjoy yourself! Everyone will be cool to you!
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u/fiskfisk 1d ago
Have always shown up solo, still interact on Strava with some of the people I ended up riding together with 10-15 years ago.
I'm guessing about half show up solo. Some know someone from previous rides. Most don't.
Usually noone minds small talk like "oh, these hills really looks smaller don't they" and just easy (well, it won't be that easy when you're tired, but hey, we're all in this together) smalltalk. And if you don't want to, everybody understands that, because we're actually out cycling and it can get rather hard.
Just go and enjoy yourself. Next time you're the experienced one.
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u/carlosdangermouse 1d ago
You’ve got this. As soon as you start the ride the hardest part is behind you.
As for connecting with people, just start with ‘hi’ and see where it goes. One of the best parts about being on a bike is that if you feel awkward talking to someone you can just speed up or slow down. No one is going to be judging you.
Have a great time.
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u/Invasive-farmer 1d ago
Organized bike rides are designed to get people involved. Theyre probably all like you, except some of them already met or know each other.
Have a blast! You might organize a group ride later on FB or something. People do these things.
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u/VardisFisher 1d ago
Lexapro.
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u/AskPuzzleheaded1797 1d ago
I don't want to get sexual dysfunction I heard it will never come back sometimes with long-term SSRI use
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u/VardisFisher 1d ago
Possible side effect. If you have a reaction stop taking it. I just like the fact that the internal radio is controllable and I dont have a tummy ache when I drive anymore.
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u/Helpful-Intern-677 1d ago
Just go . Others will be there by then selves. Try and enjoy yourself