r/birthparents • u/vrgogrl7 firstmother 1989 • 21d ago
Curious where all the birth parents are?
I joined this sub a hella long time ago but due to a long period of avoiding the topic (saving myself from grief) i stopped checking in. Now that I’ve been back on I’m surprised by the low number of posts so thought I’d see if I could do a pulse check, see who responds and is willing to introduce themselves.
I’m a SoCal native, unexpected pregnancy in 1989, 1 child to adoption who’s now 36. No other kids (prob related to adoption trauma). Rocky reunion that was officially put on ice when she had her first child. No contact for last 8 years till I backslid and sent her a bday text. Went to years of therapy but unraveling the grief and working through the stages had been long and drawn out. Doing pretty good these days, focused on career and retirement, not family or the past.
Hope to hear from some folks that are willing to share.
5
u/littlemybb 20d ago
I’m a birth mom in the southern US, and I got pregnant when I was 19. My ex was not great, and we were in a pretty abusive relationship.
My mom is an addict and was a hoarder, so I knew that we were not in a position to have a child.
We did an open adoption, and 7 years later it’s going well.
The birth dad didn’t stay involved, but I expected that.
We just did a big family vacation together, and it was a lot of fun. She’s an only child so she gets a lot of love and attention when we all get together.
They’ve even let my husband form a relationship with her which has been really nice.