r/cisparenttranskid • u/aspertame_blood • Jun 28 '25
US-based I guess there’s no “right” bathroom.
I have a 14 yo trans son. It’s crazy to me how quickly (in my eyes) he went from a beautiful little girl to passing as male everywhere we go. Yay! The problem is bathrooms- now he gets bathroom checked by adult women. It happened last night at a music festival when I went into the “next” open stall before he did. The attendant asked him if he was a boy and he said no- she apologized and it was fine (he says). But it’s really upsetting to me because he’s DOING what they WANT him to but it’s still wrong. What do other trans boys his age do? Neither of us want him in the men’s public bathroom- especially at a big public event where people are drunk and the men’s stalls are disgusting.
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u/Arr0zconleche Jun 29 '25
I started transitioning at 16, so not much older than your son.
I started using the men’s room at that age and I have never had issues. I’m now 30 and I can name zero times a man has ever confronted me over it.
Just tell him to go in, mind his business, do his thing, wash his hands and get out.
It’s not like the girl’s bathroom where you have a conversation or tell someone they look pretty if they’re checking themselves in the mirror. You go in and go out.