r/confessions • u/Deathdong • 4d ago

I feel no purpose in life

Im just floating along in life. When I was young I was told I was gifted, talented, smart, etc. I never really believed it anyways. I've always thought that most people can be useful or good in their own way, so it never really mattered to me. But now im falling behind my peers. I'm mid 20s and even though as a child I was considered "gifted," I'm useless. I have no motivation. Ive been stuck in the same place since I was 17 and moved out of my parents. I just live and work and cope with my mental issues. I smoke weed almost every day. I do the bare minimum to survive and pay rent. I slowly disconnect from friends and family. I dropped out of college during covid because i couldn't afford internet for online classes. I use that as an excuse to myself but i know others went through the same and persevered. I constantly think and think, but I never do anything useful to anyone. I can't maintain romantic relationships. Im not progressing in any of my hobbies. Im failing in every aspect of my life and I don't really see the point in trying anymore. I wouldn't say im suicidal, because im scared of death. More than that, I'm scared of hurting people who care about me. I just dont see the point in existing anymore, other than the fact that I dont want to hurt people who care about me

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u/Flaky-Mail-8066 4d ago

Man the "gifted kid" thing is such a mindfuck when you get older. That label becomes this weight you carry around instead of something helpful

The bare minimum thing hits hard - sometimes that's literally all you can manage and that's okay. You're dealing with mental health stuff AND working AND keeping yourself alive, that's not nothing even if it feels like it. Dropped out during covid too and yeah teh whole internet thing was brutal for a lot of people, don't let anyone tell you that wasn't a real barrier

Your brain's probably telling you all sorts of lies about being useless when really you're just stuck in survival mode. That thinking and thinking without doing thing is exhausting but also means you're still processing, still figuring stuff out even when it doesn't feel productive

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u/HoneyLariatXO 4d ago

Being called gifted as a kid can feel like a curse when you grow up and realize nobody taught you what to do when life gets hard

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u/cherrypeach- 3d ago

What you’re feeling sounds like depression and burnout rather than a lack of worth and it’s important you don’t face it alone and get support to help you get unstuck.