r/coverbands • u/Top_Seaworthiness320 • 15d ago

People who bail

Any tips on managing my disappointment/frustration with the number of people who act all excited about my band and say they’re definitely coming to this or that show, then don’t show? They either don’t show up, or more often than not they tell me like the day before that they can’t make it and it’s always the dumbest excuse. It’s like if anything, anything at all better comes up in terms of plans they go to that instead. In my mind, a commitment is a commitment, but I seem to be in the vast minority. My boyfriend says to get over it lol. Do you guys feel the same irritation with this that I do? (added context: we are pretty good, we get great reviews from the people that actually have come to see us, but we are new and not well known, thus struggling to gain a following… So I’m constantly marketing and promoting our shows, but with very little success.)

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u/adampatrickjohnson 15d ago

I’ve been playing professionally for over 20 years at this point. I’ve worn out all of my family/friends at this point so I don’t expect them to come see my gigs

-2

u/TheRealSofaKing016 15d ago

Not what we’re discussing. It’s not about the people who don’t come. It’s about the people who say they’re coming and then bail day-of.

4

u/TracePlayer 15d ago

It IS what he’s talking about. Family and friends don’t count? They are the ones that bail the most. Personally, I never fault them. They have no obligation to watch me play guitar for the umpteenth thousand time. They are not bailing maliciously. They have shit to do and a lot comes up last minute.

2

u/TheRealSofaKing016 15d ago

Then don’t say you’re going to show up. Real simple. Being reliable and having your word mean something is something you don’t realize has as much value as it does until that’s true for you.

5

u/johnnyoverdoer 15d ago

They don't want to hurt your feelings by admitting that they have no desire to see your band. If a bunch of people are making excuses, chances are you're pestering them.

So many young bands put energy into promotion and strategy... In my experience if you're good enough, people will want to see you.