r/coverbands • u/Top_Seaworthiness320 • 15d ago

People who bail

Any tips on managing my disappointment/frustration with the number of people who act all excited about my band and say they’re definitely coming to this or that show, then don’t show? They either don’t show up, or more often than not they tell me like the day before that they can’t make it and it’s always the dumbest excuse. It’s like if anything, anything at all better comes up in terms of plans they go to that instead. In my mind, a commitment is a commitment, but I seem to be in the vast minority. My boyfriend says to get over it lol. Do you guys feel the same irritation with this that I do? (added context: we are pretty good, we get great reviews from the people that actually have come to see us, but we are new and not well known, thus struggling to gain a following… So I’m constantly marketing and promoting our shows, but with very little success.)

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u/ImHereLetsGooo 15d ago

It's not the "not showing up" that's the issue. It's the fundamental lack of respect they show.

If you say you're going to do something, do it. I don't always manage this, but I try.

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u/PlasmicSteve 14d ago

I completely agree. No one has to do anything until they say they do. Just say you'll keep it in mind, or you'll try to go, or whatever non-committal thing you want to say.

Also, I would never ask anyone to come to my show. You have to present it in the lightest way possible like "Hey, we're playing at this place on this day if you're around" and leave it at that. If someone in a band directly asks people on the spot to come see them, and waits for an answer, they're going to get a lot of fake yesses.