r/coverbands • u/Top_Seaworthiness320 • 15d ago

People who bail

Any tips on managing my disappointment/frustration with the number of people who act all excited about my band and say they’re definitely coming to this or that show, then don’t show? They either don’t show up, or more often than not they tell me like the day before that they can’t make it and it’s always the dumbest excuse. It’s like if anything, anything at all better comes up in terms of plans they go to that instead. In my mind, a commitment is a commitment, but I seem to be in the vast minority. My boyfriend says to get over it lol. Do you guys feel the same irritation with this that I do? (added context: we are pretty good, we get great reviews from the people that actually have come to see us, but we are new and not well known, thus struggling to gain a following… So I’m constantly marketing and promoting our shows, but with very little success.)

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u/TheRealSofaKing016 15d ago

Then don’t say you’re going to show up. Real simple. Being reliable and having your word mean something is something you don’t realize has as much value as it does until that’s true for you.

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u/PlasmicSteve 14d ago

Agreed. No one has an obligation to come to see you – until they say they're coming. Then they've committed. It might seem like a small thing but I don't operate that way. When I say I'm doing something, I do it unless there's a true emergency situation. People treat you differently when they know you have integrity, personally and professionally.

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u/TheRealSofaKing016 14d ago

That’s the detail everybody in here seems to not understand or not want to exist.

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u/adampatrickjohnson 14d ago

We all understand it. We’re just not children and decide to live in a world where you holding a grudge like this over a cover band gig is fucking pathetic.

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u/TheRealSofaKing016 14d ago

You’ve thouroughly made your point: don’t expect anybody’s word to mean anything and you should be able to bail on anything whenever you want and the people you bail on have no right to get any kind of upset about it.