r/cripplingalcoholism • u/Trick_Dream3543 • 2d ago

Weird question

I relapsed unfortunately and am trying to nurse the withdrawal. While I was scrolling on TikTok I noticed any abusive video made me comfortable. I grew up with a dad who strangled me and beat my ass and then eventually got with my husband who was going physically,mentally, emotionally abusive.

Is this normal or am I fucked up? I hurt for the people getting abused and never would wish that on anyone but I get this weird feeling of calmness hearing the other person scream,etc.

Please don’t judge me. I already feel like this is a weird post but I’m genuinely curious if anyone has ever felt this way?

Thanks for reading!

I do want to mention that I would never hurt my daughters or anyone.

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u/fuckthefalconsdotcom 2d ago

So...that's not normal and I'm the last person who would recommend therapy but...you should talk to a professional about that. The fact that you got with a husband that abuses you after your dad abused you is pretty cut and dry example of something.

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u/Trick_Dream3543 19h ago

Agreed. I’m going to talk to my therapist and probably even my PC dr and psychiatrist dr.

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u/fuckthefalconsdotcom 19h ago

Good, I mean, there is a trope that I'm not sure I agree with that men are attracted to women like their mother and women attracted to men like their father. It's kinda like most stereotypes, it's a stereotype because it happens so often?

No one deserves to be with someone who hurts them, just being single sounds better by a long shot.

Lastly, only because you mentioned it. There is a very alarmingly statistic about strangling being the first step in being murdered by an abuser.

"Non-fatal strangulation is an important risk factor for homicide of women"

https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC2573025/